The official UKY inlaw venting thread

Umm...yeah.  My sister got a FB birthday greeting from me.  And I'm pretty sure I didn't get her anything for her graduation because I was 20 and had no money.

Aww, ImissEngland, my sister doesn't even remember my birthday half the time--these days I'm lucky if I get a text on my birthday, let alone a card.  I've lowered my expectations.  I think you and your fiance need to as well.  When you expect nothing, you are not disappointed.  Anything you do get then, is a bonus.

Timely and good advice.  I am going to try adopting this in my life.

Timely and good advice.  I am going to try adopting this in my life.

It's kinda Buddhist in a way--non attatchment.  But it brings peace where otherwise there would be suffering.  It's a work in progress for me.

So true Andee. I am lucky if my mother remembers. She doesn't even remember her grandkids' birthdays, even when I phone a couple weeks ahead (time for a card), then when I phone the day before (at least she could call and say happy birthday). Very sad for the kids.

yep, I was even home for my birthday about 5 years ago and I didn't even get a card. When my husband gave me all my presents (he'd brought them from England so I could open them) she said, "is it your birthday??".

Yet, if I ever forgot HER birthday, there'd be all kinds of stinking hell to pay

They drove about 400 miles "for his birthday and graduation." but in reality they've spent the majority of their time here gambling away $100's. Df has gotten his family really nice bday presents over the last few years that he's put alot of thought and effort into. He is expected to. I
think after this it's gonna be $25  gift cards for all of them

I just found an extremly disgusting, Stinky, Overflowed, clogged
toilet in the spare bathroom  df just left to go
out of town for work too, so that means I have to clean it all up and unclog
it. I know df's moms husband was the last to use it.     

It's kinda Buddhist in a way--non attatchment.  But it brings peace where otherwise there would be suffering. 

I like this. 

I just found an extremly disgusting, Stinky, Overflowed, clogged
toilet in the spare bathroom  df just left to go
out of town for work too, so that means I have to clean it all up and unclog
it. I know df's moms husband was the last to use it.     

EEEK! I'm sorry you have to put up with that.

For Christmas, I've bought DH the Musto gloves he asked for. I also got him a matching woollen hat, even though he didn't ask for that.

Last week, the MIL told me she'd bought gloves for him too! I explained what I'd done (mentioning and describing the hat as well), and she said she'd return her gloves.

Fine.

This morning, I asked DH if he knew what his mother had got him for Christmas. He said, "I know she's got me a woolly hat."

 

We just received SIL's package. It contains presents for everyone including my sister's husband (but not my sister) and my dad (but not my mom). What kind of logic is that??

MIL keeps ringing my cell phone because DH never has his with him. Stop it!!

When you expect nothing, you are not disappointed.  Anything you do get then, is a bonus.

Good advice. 

I like this. 

Good advice. 

Thank you. 

DH invited the inlaws over for Christmas lunch.  Normally I don't mind, I truly like them. 
However...
I was planning a dinner similar to what I am used to having in the States.  Today MIL called saying she was bringing the Christmas crackers and FIL was going to cook some parsnips. 
I know compared to others it isn't much to complain about, but I really struggle with Christmas.  Each year it gets more difficult. 
Hopefully I'll be off the day/night nurse by then so I can hit the wine and not worry about it.   

I agree that is good advice. But DF had been told that he was going to be given family property in another state when he graduated from college. They have been telling him that ever since he started college. Then when it came down to it, DF's mother decided at the last second that DF couldn't have it after all.   It's really DF's grandmother's property, and DF's mom is mad that she wants to give it to him instead of her.

If anything, this is going to make all future shopping for them much easier.  $25 Visa gift cards for all.  

MIL was on the phone with DH and told him they'd invited a couple to live with them for six months.  I guess the woman works near to the in-laws and have a long commute, so this would make it easier.  Well, the parents of the couple came to visit my in-laws and somehow it got back to MIL that they recommended the couple NOT move in, based on (I'm sure) the state of the house and the neighborhood.  DH was not surprised.  This led to DH suggesting they could move to a nicer neighborhood, and MIL 'didn't want to get into it'. 

Then, in a stunning move, MIL stated that she is so glad she doesn't live in a community where they make you clean up your lawn and keep things nice because these types of places attract thieves.  According to MIL, if your place is too nice, thieves will know you have nice things inside of it and will target you.