Leaving do etiquette?

My last day of work is Friday and I've had a few people ask me if I'm going to have a leaving do.

This is the only company I've ever worked at in the UK (I've been there for 3 years). I can't drink alchohol for medical reasons and I'm not the type of person to mingle and make small talk with large groups of people, so I'm not big on inviting a huge group of people to the pub, which seems to be what is usually done at my company. I wouldn't mind inviting a few people out to lunch. But either way, I can't afford to pay for other people's drinks or lunches. If I invite people to lunch, am I expected to pay for everyone? Am I  expected to invite my line manager and/or the people in my immediate team or can I just go to lunch with whomever I want?

I know that I'm really free to do whatever I want, but I want to leave on a positive note.

When we have leaving dos at work, we usually just go for a meal somewhere like Bella Italia, Frankie and Benny's or TGI's, with between 10 and 15 people from the department and everyone pays for themselves. Also, we will generally do a collection a few days before the person leaves and use it to buy a card and a leaving present for them. The person leaving doesn't have to contribute anything cost-wise apart from paying for their own drinks/food (unless we treat them).

In my experience the other colleagues pay for the meal of the person who is leaving. At my last work, we also used to have an afternoon tea (snacks, cakes and soft drinks) for leavers, paid for by the boss.

In my experience, it's usually drinks after work... no meal involved.

In my experience, it's usually drinks after work... no meal involved.

That's my experience too, but I thought I might avoid the pub as I can't drink alchohol anyway. Also, my experiences have been that the person who is leaving invites everyone they've ever worked with and their friends (I've received email invites to leaving dos for people I've never met) and that's just not my thing. I'd rather sit at a table with a couple of friends and chat, at the pub at lunch or wherever.

On my last leaving do I just told everyone we were going to the pub on friday for my last day and asked everyone if they wanted to come.  The leaver is DEFINATLY not expected to pay for everyones meal and drinks. Then at the pub they gave me flowers and a card and my boss paid for everyones lunch on his company card.  Theres no reason why you can't go to the pub or a restaurant and not drink? I only had a diet coke when i went.

Also, I brought in cakes for everyone on my last day. 

I'd rather sit at a table with a couple of friends and chat, at the pub at lunch or wherever.

I think it would be a bit odd to just invite a few people, but your leaving...so do you really care what the others think?!

I didn't bother with one at all at my last employer before I started teaching at Uni. Like at your place, leaving do-s were an excuse to go to the pub but I didn't like the local pubs and didn't want to drink with those folks anyway.

Stick to your guns. Invite some folks to have a quiet lunch if you want, or just politely decline the whole thing.

If you don't want to do it, don't.  But I think bringing in some cakes is a good idea.

Vicky

Remember this is your last opportunity to be nice; you might want a reference, you might work there again, compete with them at a future job, work with some of the team again in the future or any of these things.

So I also vote for buying quality cakes to leave on a sweet note plus drinks/lunch if you want but personally say thanks to everyone (even those you hate!) so people think good of you in the future.  

Stick to your guns. Invite some folks to have a quiet lunch if you want, or just politely decline the whole thing.

I agree with this. Do want you want to do, not what you feel you have to do.