Group dinner: How to split the bill

If going out in a group for dinner, I highly recommend inviting Geeta along. She can divide a bill up and give everyone the correct change in seconds. No mess, no fuss, no quibbling.  

So true!  I always try to take Geeta.  

This is why I love group dining in Germany. The waitress/waiter comes around to each person and you pay for what you've ordered.

Genau! 

I was going to say earlier, that if you are wanting seperate bills, you'd better specify that at the outset, as it's not like Germany, where when they come with 'die rechnung', they ask if you want seperate bills.

I personally hate the 'split it evenly between everyone' thing, as someone is always at a disadvantage, and it's usually the person with the least money. 

I personally hate the 'split it evenly between everyone' thing, as someone is always at a disadvantage, and it's usually the person with the least money. 

I hate it too, mostly because I usually get the cheapest item as I'm vegetarian, and I usually am one of the ones to lose out.  (This never happens with Shahbanou and Mindy, though!!)

The latest was in the UK when we went out to dinner with my old office mates.  We were a big group of say 15 and everyone had beer and drinks except us, plus everyone had meat except us.  We paid 35 quid each and I know there's no way we ordered that much food.  I was annoyed but I wasn't really going to make a fuss in that sort of situation.  But it leaves a bad taste in your mouth.

I used to get upset, especially when I'd be out with friends and a few people would order a lot to drink, more then me especially since I'm usually only a one or two drink per meal person. But then I just decided that was the price I had to pay to enjoy their company and it was totally worth it

My parents go to dinner with friends that order $100 (at least) bottleS of wine every time. They don't drink the wine, but they have the same mindset as I do. (maybe that's where I get it from)

I used to get upset, especially when I'd be out with friends and a few people would order a lot to drink, more then me especially since I'm usually only a one or two drink per meal person. But then I just decided that was the price I had to pay to enjoy their company and it was totally worth it

My parents go to dinner with friends that order $100 (at least) bottleS of wine every time. They don't drink the wine, but they have the same mindset as I do. (maybe that's where I get it from)

That's pretty much how I feel about it. Because I don't eat red meat, I usually spend less than the people who order beef ... but it doesn't bother me too much. Every now and then I drink enough to balance it out! 

Sometimes we split, sometimes we pay for what we ate/drank- if we split it evenly, we get it back in drinks afterwards.

One of my US friends since college has always underpaid, no matter what, every single time... it became a joke between the rest of us that if you go out with her, bring extra cash! She's an electrical engineer, so she should know how to do basic math! However,  I was pleasantly surprised last time we went out that she actually put in her fair share!

My parents go to dinner with friends that order $100 (at least) bottleS of wine evey time. They don't drink the wine, but they have the same mindset as I do. (maybe that's where I get it from)

I'm so not ok what that! If I'm going to have to pay a share of a $100 bottle wine I'm at least gonna have a glass of it. 

I hate it too, mostly because I usually get the cheapest item as I'm vegetarian, and I usually am one of the ones to lose out.  (This never happens with Shahbanou and Mindy, though!!)

The latest was in the UK when we went out to dinner with my old office mates.  We were a big group of say 15 and everyone had beer and drinks except us, plus everyone had meat except us.  We paid 35 quid each and I know there's no way we ordered that much food.  I was annoyed but I wasn't really going to make a fuss in that sort of situation.  But it leaves a bad taste in your mouth.

I agree with you.  I don't drink and always get the veggie (cheapest) option, so I lose out every time the bill is split evenly.

I'm so not ok what that! If I'm going to have to pay a share of a $100 bottle wine I'm at least gonna have a glass of it. 

I agree, I'd have to have a glass or two!!!  Actually, I have if I go out with them all.    (But then I don't pay at all, hehe)

Being the forthright, direct American that I am, I know that some people in our circle of friends have different budgets than others.  If I'm organizing the gathering I send out an email beforehand that clarifies that we won't be splitting the bill evenly, in a nice way of course.  I've had friends that weren't going to attend our monthly girlie meetups because they just couldn't afford it. Heck with that, it's about the friendship. 

I agree, it is different in the states where it's customary to have the wait staff split the bill. If we're doing something like Sushi or tapas where everyone is sharing, then it makes sense to split the bill.

I think that being honest and upfront about how the bill is going to be taken care of can prevent hard feelings later.

I had a friend in the US who would always pull out a calculator in a restaurant and work it out to the penny. I thought that was incredibly mean, as well as tacky tacky tacky. Generally, our meals cost about the same and I could see no sense in behaving that way over what was essentially pennies. And we ate out together so often that it always evened up, anyway. I hated that and, to me, splitting it evenly to avoid such awkwardness is worth a bit of money!

When I was in the military and a group of us would go out to lunch, we'd occasionally play a game called "Credit Card Roulette" in which we'd put everyone's credit card into a hat, and whichever one the waiter/waitress pulled out paid for everyone.

We all thought this was great fun until one guy got into big trouble with his wife.  Apparently he'd lost the game and paid a $100 lunch bill using a debit card, and didn't tell his wife, who wound up bouncing a bunch of checks because she thought they had more money in the account than they did.

 

I had a friend in the US who would always pull out a calculator in a restaurant and work it out to the penny. I thought that was incredibly mean, as well as tacky tacky tacky. Generally, our meals cost about the same and I could see no sense in behaving that way over what was essentially pennies. And we ate out together so often that it always evened up, anyway. I hated that and, to me, splitting it evenly to avoid such awkwardness is worth a bit of money!

Uggh. Now that's a bit excessive!!!!!!!!!!

I had a friend in the US who would always pull out a calculator in a restaurant and work it out to the penny. I thought that was incredibly mean, as well as tacky tacky tacky. Generally, our meals cost about the same and I could see no sense in behaving that way over what was essentially pennies. And we ate out together so often that it always evened up, anyway. I hated that and, to me, splitting it evenly to avoid such awkwardness is worth a bit of money!

I admit I'm a calculator kind of girl. But I do it for other people, as much as myself. This has been a commonly discussed topic between my friends, and I find that a lot of people feel that they get screwed over when it comes to splitting bills evenly. Because I would never want to put someone in that uncomfortable position, I have no shame in being the one to split the bill as evenly as possible.

I'm happy to go whichever way, but I think my preference generally is to split the bill evenly - much simpler, and it seems when I'm out with friends (recently anyway) people end up having about the same amount of drinks, courses, etc.

I have been out with large groups before where everyone just put in for what they themselves ordered (or what they think they ordered several drinks on), as the bill got passed around the table, and then the last person got stuck making up the difference because someone along the line (not knowing who) didn't put in enough or didn't add some for service charge/tip, etc.  Which then becomes a stressful thing either to figure out who didn't pay sufficiently, or the last person having to suck it up and pay more than their portion.  Complicated and awkward!  So it's not just splitting up evenly that can leave people feeling ripped off, if you see what I mean?

And I agree with chary about calculators.