Going on monday and worried about my mother

This, and again, not to pour salt in the wound.  But why didn't you just go?

Agree. You have to assert yourself over your family. You are an adult now, and you can't keep letting them control you like this. They need to learn when to let go. My mother was terribly upset the first time I was going to travel alone, at age 19, to the point where she wound me up at the airport, telling me she knew the plane would crash. I nearly had a panic attack, but I told her off and got on the plane anyway, even though she had me so worked up I was terrified. It was the best thing I ever did, in my opinion, and I had a great time.

Unfortunately, you don't get a do-over on this one, but if I were you, I would tell my uncle to shove that his offer to buy your boyfriend a ticket up the whazoo, that I don't need his help, that I am sick of my family interfering in my life, and I would probably try to find a way to get another ticket on my own, no matter how long it took, and tell them to sod off. I wouldn't let them have any control over how or when I saw my boyfriend, if it were me. But, you have to decide for yourself. You really need to stand up for yourself, though, and do what's best for you, not let them convince you that THEY know what's best. Good luck to you.

What a terrible thing to happen to you, Phantomrose .

The others are right though - you're 19, you're an adult and you can do what you choose to do... it's not fair that you should have to sacrifice your happiness and your choices for your family, especially when you're an adult yourself. I can understand that they might be worried about you meeting up with and staying with someone you've never met before, but you have already made it known that you have a back-up plan if anything goes wrong. It sounds more like your mum just doesn't want to accept that you're grown up now and old enough to make your own decisions .

When I was 18, I flew to the US on my own and stayed there for a month (with US relatives)... then I did it again a few months later and stayed for 5 weeks. I don't think my parents got a say in it at all though... I just told them I was going and they said 'as long as you can afford it, go for it and have a great time!'.

Then at 20, I moved to the US on my own for a year... I was moving 5,000 miles away from my family, but my mum just told me she'd miss me and practically pushed me onto the plane! In a few weeks, I'm heading off to South America for 2 months... completely on my own (although I will be joining a guided tour when I get there) - I actually think I'm more scared about the whole thing than my mum is (she was the one who suggested I go travelling in the first place and keeps saying she wants to come too)!

Mucho Hugs for Phantomrose90.

I was really hoping it would go the other way. Someone mentioned paying the $200.00 change fee and just leave! I would do that in a heart beat!

It is your life. At 19 you should know your mind, and you had all the contingencies in place - I don't think you're being stupid or foolish. You definitely have thought this out - and no one should try to stop you.

and don't think you've failed. It's not your fault! Everyone here is supporting you, and I hope you'll be able to make it "across the pond" very soon.

Lisa

And what was the role of the police officer? I can't believe the police would get involved in something like this.

My guess would be to get the uncle past security.

I'm so sorry it didn't happen for you, but I do think that you shouldn't give up.  Like many of the posters said - you are an adult, and you were very responsible in your plans and even in telling your parents about your trip. There's no reason to let your family talk you out of doing something you want to do.

Like Zoya said, you might be able to still change your ticket for a small fee and be able to go. Since your uncle wants to pay for your BFs ticket, I'd ask him for the money back for your original ticket and then book a new flight. 

Thank you everyone for being supportive; seriously, your replies are helping me feel a little better.

Unfortunately, my parents took my passport right when I got back home, so even if I did book another flight, I would have to find a way to get the passport back from my parents.

About the police officer- I did feel scared that he was around. If he was there just to scare me out of it, then it worked. Also, when I left my parents told my grandparents, and got them all upset and worried. My grandparents knew that I was talking to him for two years, but they did not know that I was going. I was planning on telling them, but only when I got there because I knew they would be worried sick about me. I almost put my spanish grandmother in the hospital (according to my uncle) and that made me feel really upset.

Holy Guilt Trip!!!

Find your passport actually its stealing or something it is a government document and you are of age. I really think you need to move out or stay with a friend but my god get your passport back OR HECK apply for a lost one expedited and not tell your parents pay the fee if the airlines lets you and go...

You cannot put your grandmother in the hospital - if you are close with them go to their place and talk with them. Explain everything and maybe they will see your side and know your plans and support you.

Huggs to you!

I almost put my spanish grandmother in the hospital (according to my uncle) and that made me feel really upset.

My best friend's mother pulls that kind of cr@p guilt trip stuff on her all the time, and she's 30-something!  She finally stopped falling for it.  It is not your responsibility if living your own life and making your own choices upsets your family.

By taking your passport away they are treating you like a little child.  They have no right to do this.  It seems you are almost being held prisoner in your home, but sometimes parents can say, "As long as you are under my roof, you live by my rules."  So I'm thinking you've got to move out.  If you can't afford your own place can you find a room-mate or perhaps stay with a friend temporarily?

You have my support Phantomrose--time to live your own life and have your own adventures and make your own choices and if need be, learn from your own mistakes.

cross-posted with Zoyabean.

Also, as far as I'm concerned they owe you the full price of the ticket--check, cash, or paypal payment.  They can stuff the idea of buying your BF a ticket to the US. 

Now *you* have grounds to call the police.  Yes, they are your parents, but you are an adult so they cannot just take your stuff.

How did your relatives convince a police officer to take the time to get involved in something like this?  Do they know people who are on the force personally or something?

Phantonrose - do some research it is technically stolen and yes there will be strings.
You can't rely on their financial support but also claim to be an adult and do what you want BUT if you wanted to pursue this read up...
http://www.justanswer.com/questions/1xztb-someone-steals-passport-find

Good Luck Dear!

<edit their to there>

How did your relatives convince a police officer to take the time to get involved in something like this?  Do they know people who are on the force personally or something?

I was wondering about this too. In the UK, the police would just tell someone trying to do this to get stuffed, or even arrest them for abusing their adult child!

Is there a women's refuge type organisation where you live? I would give them a call and get the hell out of your family's house. They sound like something out of a bad reality movie.

How did your relatives convince a police officer to take the time to get involved in something like this?  Do they know people who are on the force personally or something?

Yes- My Uncle's girlfriend is close friends with somebody from the force and had him come down with my uncle.

Ziyabean- Thank you feel the link and I will definitely read up.

To answer a previous question that was asked (sorry I did not answer earlier), I live in CT. I do not know if there is a women's refuge type organization, but it is a good idea to look that up. Thank you for that suggestion.

How did your relatives convince a police officer to take the time to get involved in something like this?  Do they know people who are on the force personally or something?

Pure speculation, but I bet sobbing to the police that your "baby girl" "ran away" to meet a man "off the internet she met online" would gain police help and the police probably didn't even ask how old she was!

Yes- My Uncle's girlfriend is close friends with somebody from the force and had him come down with my uncle.

In that case, I would report him because this was NOT a police matter.

Wow, which airport was this from?