In matters of cultural differences, projecting your own prejudices and judgements upon the actions of other people is not normally "best form", in fact, I wouldn't like to call this narrow-mindedness but it can be suggested as such.
Something that could be done instead would be considering opposing viewpoints -
For instance - how about considering the following, without jumping to the idea of cowardliness? (Btw, I find that the idea that a man would be afraid of telling his wife laughable, and quite old fashioned! It conjures up images of a fishwife in curlers from an old sitcom! If my DB or my friends DB is going to be late, they will TEXT in case of worry, not for any other reason.)
1. It would be rude to call at the table, so in order not to ruin atmosphere and leave people seated alone, a 10 second text could be sent instead.
1a. If people did in fact call at the table, or in the group then everyone could hear their conversation, this is a double whammy of rude and uncomfortable for those who could overhear.
2. Most men would not consider this to be hugely important information and more of a courtesy, certainly not akin to being broken up with (poor Jewlz, what a jerk!) in levels of importunateness, and therefore perfectly acceptable to being put in a text. That one person's wife (which he obviously did not expect) was offended was unfortunate, and seems to be the exception rather than the rule.
3. The wives may have taken this opportunity to have a relaxing bath, watch a film, read a book, go out with their own friends, they may have small sleeping children and would not appreciate the interruption of a text.
4. It would not normally provoke a discussion topic, the response to "I'm going to be later than normally" would not usually solicit a response of more than "Have fun", "Don't be home too late", "can you grab some milk at the 24 hour garage?" and therefore suitable for a text.
5. If a simple text to tell your spouse escalates into a "war" for your friends in the US because of what is "implied" then I would honestly suggest contacting Relate to discuss trust issues in their relationship.
How is this preferable to a UK spouse sending a text to say their going to be late not being a big deal? Surely the latter is preferable to the former?! This makes absolutely zero sense to me.
A text implies trust in a relationship in this manner. It can be sent from anywhere, it is not a discussion it is information. It is one loving partner telling another that they will be home later and not to worry. A call in this situation is an untrusted partner checking in with their prison guard to ask permission to stay out later.