Trouble With Neighbors - Advice Sought

(things like this never go well)

The OP has never met them before. Why would she (or anyone else) assume that they aren't nice, reasonable people?

They're smoking pot, not running a crackhouse.

I don't think you can ever hope to be on good terms with your neighbours if your first line of action is to call the authorities rather than simply talking to them face to face. Just my opinion.

I'm going to try to mention it to them in a casual manner and hope they make the "right" decision...but I don't have very high hopes when we're talking about people who smoke pot all day with a baby in the house.  That's kind of a-whole-nother subject though.    

I'm not faffing around with it though.  I'll be calling the cops the first time I smell anything after they've been warned.  I'm not bothered with being on good terms with them in the first place (I always tend to avoid neighbors and not be too friendly for various reasons) but it would be nice to have a mutual respect for neighborly type things.  I don't want this to turn into a war...just don't want to have to smell that every day.

I totally agree with WebyJ.  Sometimes people have a hard time calling the police in a case such as yours, however, it is the wisest thing to do.  You are not being the bad guy; you are reporting a serious problem that will affect the health of others.  It's also safer for you if you keep out of the situation.  If I were in your shoes, I would call the police when I was away from the home - do it at a time when you would normally be away or perhaps in the evening when you and DH go out for dinner or whatever.  That way your husband will be home if there is any unpleasantness from the neighbors.  Again, you are not being the bad guy by calling the police. 

I don't think you can ever hope to be on good terms with your neighbours if your first line of action is to call the authorities rather than simply talking to them face to face. Just my opinion.

Yes!

I agree with WebyJ, I'd certainly phone the police but do it when my hubby is home or we're both out or whatever.  It's obvious these people aren't reasonable if they smoke pot when there very own grandchild is in the house. 

Whatever you decide to do I hope it works out for the best.

If there is a baby in the home, it should be reported to child protection. An infant being exposed to drugs can be devastating to his/her growth and development. Plus if all of the adults in the home are getting high, no one is going to be able to properly take care of the baby. Which puts the baby's safety at risk.

This would be my main concern in combination with the health and welfare of your family, due to exposure to the smoke.

I don't think you can ever hope to be on good terms with your neighbours if your first line of action is to call the authorities rather than simply talking to them face to face. Just my opinion.

True, but is the greater priority being friends with them or protecting her own family? I'd go with the latter.  If these people have a child in their home being exposed to dope smoke, I would definitely alert social services for one thing and if nothing changes after that, the police. 

If it had just been your adult neighbors that had been smoking, that's one thing.  But if there's a child being exposed, then IMO, it becomes something else entirely.  I would call child protection about it.  Sorry to hear you've been having to deal with this!  Uh! 

True, but is the greater priority being friends with them or protecting her own family?

Not being friends, but just avoiding unnecessary animosity. I'm not saying that it won't end up with the OP having to phone the authorities - it just seems a drastic first step to me. As I've said, it's just my opinion and the way I'd handle things if these were my neighbours.

Not being friends, but just avoiding unnecessary animosity. I'm not saying that it won't end up with the OP having to phone the authorities - it just seems a drastic first step to me. As I've said, it's just my opinion and the way I'd handle things if these were my neighbours.

Yes. She may have to live next to these people for a very long time.

She wants to avoid the conflict that comes from knocking on the door and talking to them. Do you think that there will be less conflict after she has phoned the authorities on them?

I agree that I basically want to keep everything as peaceful as possible.  I don't want to be friends with them (I've never wanted to be friends with any of my neighbors) but I also don't want them throwing bricks through my window at 3am.  We're planning to move in the next 6 months at the latest (we have to get a bigger house for baby whether we like it or not) so I guess it's not a huge deal if we don't on...but still.

Interestingly enough, DH overheard some people from next door talking about the cops.  One comment was along the lines of "Why did you call the cops?" and the other was something about the cops being there earlier.  This was between the people that live in/frequent the house...not them and someone else.  I'm not sure what happened because we were gone all day but it sounds like someone might have beaten me to it anyway.  No mysterious smells wafting from the house this evening so I guess we'll see how it goes.  Hopefully whatever happened today might scare them "straight" at least until we move.

I hope it's all sorted! 

Not being friends, but just avoiding unnecessary animosity. I'm not saying that it won't end up with the OP having to phone the authorities - it just seems a drastic first step to me. As I've said, it's just my opinion and the way I'd handle things if these were my neighbours.

Yes I get where you and sweetpeach are coming from, just saying what I'd do, as a parent. Just my opinion.

Interestingly enough, DH overheard some people from next door talking about the cops.  One comment was along the lines of "Why did you call the cops?" and the other was something about the cops being there earlier.  This was between the people that live in/frequent the house...not them and someone else.  I'm not sure what happened because we were gone all day but it sounds like someone might have beaten me to it anyway.  No mysterious smells wafting from the house this evening so I guess we'll see how it goes.  Hopefully whatever happened today might scare them "straight" at least until we move.

That would be the best outcome, if someone else already did it!! Keep us posted.

Interestingly enough, DH overheard some people from next door talking about the cops.  One comment was along the lines of "Why did you call the cops?" and the other was something about the cops being there earlier.  This was between the people that live in/frequent the house...not them and someone else.  I'm not sure what happened because we were gone all day but it sounds like someone might have beaten me to it anyway.  No mysterious smells wafting from the house this evening so I guess we'll see how it goes.  Hopefully whatever happened today might scare them "straight" at least until we move.

Good. If you're lucky everything will work out without you having to get too involved.