Inconvenient Annoyances

Note to self, never purchase an Indesit.

I am very much looking forward to a nice, old-fashioned top-loading washing machine.

I miss them so much. And people not having to rely on nice weather to dry their clothes, so I could actually sit in the garden when it's sunny and open windows. Still recovering from yesterday's migraine because my husband had put the bedroom windows on "trickle".

Hello, everyone! I really need to vent. I'm really exhausted by my BIL and his girlfriend (he's British and she's American). She's here on a visa that is expiring soon so they're both going a bit mental at the moment. Anyway, I've seen way too much of the girlfriend lately and I'm so fed up with her.

One thing that really irked me was this weekend she told me about how she gets "all this free stuff" from the NHS. She begins by telling me how she's been recently tested positive for an STI. I told her she needed to tell my BIL and she said, "Oh no, it's fine because he won't get it." I was pretty stern with her and she just wouldn't listen. I told my husband that he should speak to his brother and so that's going to be a fun conversation.

And another issue came up: the travel ban. I'm 99.99% certain my BIL is only with his girlfriend because she's American, as he LOVES all things American and desperately wants to live there. The travel ban in place has him pretty freaked out. Anyway, the girlfriend was telling me he's wanting to use my husband's passport to try to get into America as he's exempt from the ban and I shot that idea down pretty quick. I told my husband and so he's now on edge about his brother stealing his passport to travel to the US. It's pretty messed up, and what is horrible is that the girlfriend fully supported the idea.

And on a final note, the girlfriend recently came to me for visa advice. I told her that this forum has been massively helpful for me and I encouraged her have a look. She did not agree. At. All. I asked her how so, and she said, "The people can be pretty mean." With that, I presume someone gave her a good wake up call and told her something she didn't want to hear. So, well done to whomever did that! Thank you!

Ah, rant over. Thanks for letting me vent. 

And on a final note, the girlfriend recently came to me for visa advice. I told her that this forum has been massively helpful for me and I encouraged her have a look. She did not agree. At. All. I asked her how so, and she said, "The people can be pretty mean." With that, I presume someone gave her a good wake up call and told her something she didn't want to hear. So, well done to whomever did that! Thank you!.

Usually the case. Lol those type of people tend to like certain FB groups where they are supported and even encourage to skirt the actual laws/requirements.


RE the STI.....that is weird .. red flag to me. It's weird that she isn't wanting to tell her partner.....presumably (depending on what it is i guess) she would have had to get it from somewhere and would need to inform him so he's aware and can get checked if needed.



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Hello, everyone! I really need to vent. I'm really exhausted by my BIL and his girlfriend (he's British and she's American). She's here on a visa that is expiring soon so they're both going a bit mental at the moment. Anyway, I've seen way too much of the girlfriend lately and I'm so fed up with her.

One thing that really irked me was this weekend she told me about how she gets "all this free stuff" from the NHS. She begins by telling me how she's been recently tested positive for an STI. I told her she needed to tell my BIL and she said, "Oh no, it's fine because he won't get it." I was pretty stern with her and she just wouldn't listen. I told my husband that he should speak to his brother and so that's going to be a fun conversation.

And another issue came up: the travel ban. I'm 99.99% certain my BIL is only with his girlfriend because she's American, as he LOVES all things American and desperately wants to live there. The travel ban in place has him pretty freaked out. Anyway, the girlfriend was telling me he's wanting to use my husband's passport to try to get into America as he's exempt from the ban and I shot that idea down pretty quick. I told my husband and so he's now on edge about his brother stealing his passport to travel to the US. It's pretty messed up, and what is horrible is that the girlfriend fully supported the idea.

And on a final note, the girlfriend recently came to me for visa advice. I told her that this forum has been massively helpful for me and I encouraged her have a look. She did not agree. At. All. I asked her how so, and she said, "The people can be pretty mean." With that, I presume someone gave her a good wake up call and told her something she didn't want to hear. So, well done to whomever did that! Thank you!

Ah, rant over. Thanks for letting me vent.

That's a whole lot of very shady behaviour! 

Usually the case. Lol those type of people tend to like certain FB groups where they are supported and even encourage to skirt the actual laws/requirements.


RE the STI.....that is weird .. red flag to me. It's weird that she isn't wanting to tell her partner.....presumably (depending on what it is i guess) she would have had to get it from somewhere and would need to inform him so he's aware and can get checked if needed.



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She's the sort who only listens to what she wants to hear. It's pretty painful to try and reason with her.

The STI thing is really bad. She didn't seem bothered by it one bit, saying that she'd had it before in the past and wasn't "too bad." Like, what?! Come on!

The STI thing is really bad. She didn't seem bothered by it one bit, saying that she'd had it before in the past and wasn't "too bad." Like, what?! Come on!

Without too many details, is it something that plausibly could be there on and off for a while or is it something that may very well mean she is being less than faithful...? Either way, if she loves him, he needs to know whether or not *she* thinks it's needed. Even if it's a small percentage he could get it, he has a right to know and it's awkward (i get it) but shouldn't be too horrible if it's not something she got elsewhere.


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The STI thing is really bad. She didn't seem bothered by it one bit, saying that she'd had it before in the past and wasn't "too bad." Like, what?! Come on!

She seems to be missing the point!

Without too many details, is it something that plausibly could be there on and off for a while or is it something that may very well mean she is being less than faithful...? Either way, if she loves him, he needs to know whether or not *she* thinks it's needed. Even if it's a small percentage he could get it, he has a right to know and it's awkward (i get it) but shouldn't be too horrible if it's not something she got elsewhere.


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I spoke to my friend who had it at one point, and she told me that you bascially get antibiotics and follow the instructions. She was advised that it wouldn't come back unless she was with someone who had it and passed it to her. If she's not being faithful, then it coming back makes sense if she's been with someone who has it.

My husband works in healthcare, and while this isn't his area of expertise, he said that with what she has, it is likely that if she is actually being faithful that she's passed it to my BIL, he's asymptomatic, and she just gets it again after her treatment (she may also not be following the treatment play correctly). She then gets treated for it, and because he still has it, he gives it back to her. I will say that neither of them are exactly the brightest, and this is pretty well-known to all who know them. It honestly would not even occur to my BIL that he could be infected, and I'm willing to bet she's not even told him and has him thinking she's just taking some medication for something else.

She seems to be missing the point!

She seems to miss a LOT of points!! When I first met her I thought she was lovely. Now that I've come to really know her I'm like, "What?!!?"

I spoke to my friend who had it at one point, and she told me that you bascially get antibiotics and follow the instructions. She was advised that it wouldn't come back unless she was with someone who had it and passed it to her. If she's not being faithful, then it coming back makes sense if she's been with someone who has it.

My husband works in healthcare, and while this isn't his area of expertise, he said that with what she has, it is likely that if she is actually being faithful that she's passed it to my BIL, he's asymptomatic, and she just gets it again after her treatment (she may also not be following the treatment play correctly). She then gets treated for it, and because he still has it, he gives it back to her. I will say that neither of them are exactly the brightest, and this is pretty well-known to all who know them. It honestly would not even occur to my BIL that he could be infected, and I'm willing to bet she's not even told him and has him thinking she's just taking some medication for something else.

she is just going to keep getting it (best case scenario where she isnt cheating) if she doesn't tell him and get him checked/sorted!

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she is just going to keep getting it (best case scenario where she isnt cheating) if she doesn't tell him and get him checked/sorted!

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Exactly. My husband has agreed to chat with him this evening. It's awkward, but it needs addressing and what makes it even more awkward is having to hear from your brother that your girlfriend has been telling people she has an STI.

Exactly. My husband has agreed to chat with him this evening. It's awkward, but it needs addressing and what makes it even more awkward is having to hear from your brother that your girlfriend has been telling people she has an STI.

To be fair, she had her opportunity...the fact she had no issue telling you but won't tell her partner she is sleeping with is odd...

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To be fair, she had her opportunity...the fact she had no issue telling you but won't tell her partner she is sleeping with is odd...

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It's pretty weird. If she had come to me to explain her situation and wanted help on telling him, that'd be one thing. But to come to me and tell me and then say she's not telling him...nope. Weird.

My husband spoke to his brother last night about this, and his brother was pretty confused. Not like "how could this be?" but, "No, I don't think that's right" confused. He said he's at least told him, so he's done his bit. It's now up to him what he does with this information.

It's pretty weird. If she had come to me to explain her situation and wanted help on telling him, that'd be one thing. But to come to me and tell me and then say she's not telling him...nope. Weird.

My husband spoke to his brother last night about this, and his brother was pretty confused. Not like "how could this be?" but, "No, I don't think that's right" confused. He said he's at least told him, so he's done his bit. It's now up to him what he does with this information.

It's like she wants to get found out by your BIL  without having to do the hard part of having an adult conversation.

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It's like she wants to get found out by your BIL  without having to do the hard part of having an adult conversation.

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You know, I hadn't thought of that. Thanks for that, and yeah, she really doesn't like "adulting." I will point out there is a considerable age gap between her and my BIL. She refers to the 90s as "a really long time ago."