Inconvenient Annoyances

YES!!!  Drives me batty when my husband gives me a hard time about that too.  (rather poor pun intended  )

I learned to shift when the car 'tells you to' which is NOT right at 20mph most of the time. It's usually closer to 30. It's dumb that it's something you arbitrarily have to do.

My annoyance is trying to get a more accurate diagosis of health issues I've had my entire life but have evolved into new and interesting (ugh) symptoms since moving here.  The NHS makes me want to scream.  Right now I'm trying to investigate if my crazy body has Ehlers Danlos or not. My GP said she couldn't refer me for x-rays and had to refer me to a specialist to then refer me for x-rays. Appointment finally arrives and the consultant is the consultant from hell.  My husband filed a complaint with PALS and we are still waiting to hear back. 

Never had an appointment with such a sick person before. The consultant purposely put me in a great deal of pain after telling him his motions during exam were extremely painful and tears streaming down my face.  But he kept on and continued doing it more forceful and at a greater range of motion until my husband literally begged him to listen to me and to stop!  The entire consultation was hostile and degrading ending with the punishment of not referring me for x-rays after spending most of the appointment scolding me like I was a child.

Another specialist I went to last year was bad but not this bad. He would not listen to me until I let my husband talk on my behalf. We chalked this up to cultural differences as the specialist we think was from an area where men talk for the women. This current consultant we think was the same as he was very hostile with me and I nudged my husband to talk for me and he listened about 30 seconds until my husband motioned for me to supply some info. When that happened the consultant again interrupted (interrupted everything I said during the visit) what I was saying and was being hostile. He wasn't hostile to my husband until after he told the consultant to stop hurting me.

So I've been in bed since Weds in a full flare of symptoms. I don't have a lot of hope for this PALS complaint to actually punish the guy but the rant is more having my health detoriate to the point of just existing some days and then get x-rays/diagosis pushed further back (which lets be honest can be a 9 month or so wait for another consultant) to finding out what's wrong with me. I find most of the GP's attitudes here really lacking

Do you have any chance of going private? I've done this a couple of times to get things done quickly, my insurance (that I've since dropped) at the time was pretty reasonable with the cost. I think one of the reasons I let my insurance drop was that I have had pretty reasonable care where I am. From what I have seen over the years it can be a crap-shoot on having good medical care.

I find most of the GP's attitudes here really lacking

Sadly, survey after survey reveal these same feelings.

Doctors too express feelings of being stretched so thin they compromise quality of care (though this guy may have just been a plain sexist a-hole).

I don't know that much about healthcare....but from what I read, I can't help but feel that the NHS is missing a great opportunity to offer a more proactive service - which by diagnosing and treating early and correctly....would end up actually saving money.

You are a good example. Do we really want you to end up bedridden?

I'm so sorry you've had such a terrible experience. I don't understand how in a nationalized system there can be such a difference in care from place to place. I have found that I have to specifically ask for what I want (for example, I'm asking for a referral to a pediatric dermatologist this afternoon when I take my eczema-ridden son to the GP), but generally I get it without much trouble. Maybe that's not the usual British way? The GPs usually seem relieved that they don't have to think too much about it! Which, now that I'm typing this, may be the issue - it sounds like you're not sure what's up and the GPs are being terribly unhelpful in figuring it out, rather than you know what you need and just need someone to OK it.

But still, that totally sucks that you're in this situation. Which is definitely more than an Inconvenient Annoyance!

My annoyance is trying to get a more accurate diagosis of health issues I've had my entire life but have evolved into new and interesting (ugh) symptoms since moving here.  The NHS makes me want to scream.  Right now I'm trying to investigate if my crazy body has Ehlers Danlos or not.

For EDS you need a referral to a rheumatologist versed in it or a geneticist. You will get no where with common doctors, they still think it's rare and that the beighton score is the only indication for it. My recommendation is to find a local support group near you, and to take their recommendations on the doctors you should see. You may need to travel and go private to get the diagnosis. I've heard a lot of nightmares from certain areas of the U.K., but London has some of the leading researchers for it and bath rheumatology has a hypermobility unit. It took me until I was 34 to be diagnosed here in the US - I have marfanoid habitus, many functional GI problems, arthritis, "fibromyalgia" (which is probably small fiber neuropathy), chronic fatigue, severe chemical sensitivities and a host of other symptoms. Send me a pm if you'd like some global resources, most of my groups are still for my local area where we also lack care but there are a few good ones I've found in England. I'll be moving to London soon and doctors are my second biggest fear. (Sorry I have no specific info but I've had more experiences like yours than I can count in the US and have diagnosed PTSD from it.)

Thanks for the replies. Was suppose to hear from PALS today at the latest (so their complaint phamphlet said) but nothing.  Right now we cannot afford to go private (Money is super tight this month and next due to hubs starting a new job and a larger unemployed gap than originally planned.) but I hope by December or Janurary we can. I read an EDS person's blog on specialists and found a few Dr's in London specializing in this condition at a hypermobility unit. We rang them late afternoon and no answer so trying again tomorrow.  At least I can see how much a private diagnosis would cost plus try to schedule an appointment sometime this winter.  I went to a rheumy in Janurary and was diagnosed with fibro but that diagnosis did not seem to fit all of my symptoms including frequent dislocations, etc.  The rheumy is the other GP I mentioned above. I can ask to see a different one to help with a diagnosis.

Yeah I think regular GP's here don't know what to do in this case. Hopefully this hypermobility place can help.  Had to shake my head at the GP's this week, my husband has had this half golf ball sized lump on the palm of his hand for three years now. It was 'we're not sure if cancer but probably not' to 'we looked at the ultrasound scans (which took nearly a year to do) and we don't know so nothing we can do'. Kept pressing husband and come to find out the ultrasound scans never actually made it to a GP they got lost. So now to wait on a scan appointment again. You really got to laugh.

Thanks for your PM Margo, I will PM you later today. Still feeling awful from the exam.

Just really annoyed...

Just started working for myself. Already have a client not paying me when it was due Friday. She said yesterday she's not messing me about, was just waiting for a payment from someone so she could pay me and she would pay last night...even to send her another invoice and all...but she never did. I'm so annoyed because I feel like no one takes me seriously because my clients right now are people I know, which makes situations like this harder. Feel like throwing in the towel :-(

What makes me even more angry is that she initially said she would pay me two weeks ago but suddenly couldn't, but all these pictures of bottles of booze showed up on her FB. I didn't say anything because the due date wasn't until this last Friday. It's annoying though.

Argh...sorry about the rant!

Just started working for myself. Already have a client not paying me when it was due Friday. She said yesterday she's not messing me about, was just waiting for a payment from someone so she could pay me and she would pay last night...even to send her another invoice and all...but she never did. I'm so annoyed because I feel like no one takes me seriously because my clients right now are people I know, which makes situations like this harder.

That sucks. While it might not help with someone you know and want to maintain a pleasant relationship with, there are laws in the UK that can help motivate people who aren't paying their invoices.

http://payontime.co.uk/

I hope that helps, if not with this, someday in the future.

Thanks for that. It is still good to have. I rightfully earned this money due and hopefully I will get it but I think I will tell her that I think this will be the last month I will do work for her because I don't want it to ruin our relationship.

So sorry to hear that BriKH!

I hope it gets worked out soon. Nothing worse than clients who aren'the paying.

I might suggest writing up a contract future clients?

So sorry to hear that BriKH!

I hope it gets worked out soon. Nothing worse than clients who aren'the paying.

I might suggest writing up a contract future clients?

I did draw up a contract. I just am new to all of this and hadn't a clue what to do especially since its someone I know...

I did draw up a contract. I just am new to all of this and hadn't a clue what to do especially since its someone I know...

Well... You're acquaintance/friend is a bit of a prat then. I'm guessing you emailed them referencing the terms of your contract? Possibly stating they have X number of days to pay you as they are now overdue by Y days?

It may come down to you deciding if getting paid  by this person is more important than your relationship with them...

All I can think to do is email them, tell them they have X number of days to pay you or you will be taking legal actions against them.
Probably small claims court, I know that takes some time.

My invoice template has a bit of fine print at the bottom that says the full amount is due in 90 days, overdue amounts will be subject to a service charge of %5 per month. 

Once I had a client who did not pay me for those 90 days.  When I started to send them another invoice each month, they soon paid up. 

My invoice doesnt have it on there, but my contract does. Also about a late fee. However, she requested that I send it to her on PayPal on Saturday night so she could pay via credit card with the due date as "to be paid upon receipt". It's bothering me so much.

I think it's because I know them which makes it so awkward to impose anything and I just don't have the guts to do it. She still hasnt said anything to me by the way. This is ongoing work that I do as well but I will be telling her that I don't think we should continue (after I get this last payment!)