The Irish are still proud to be Irish. Just because the government is crap, doesn't make them any less proud of their nationality. Likewise, when George Bush was the president (and the world was hating America) I wasn't any less proud to be an American. My American-ness isn't tied up with what the government is up to.
I wasn't pleased he was president, but, aside from sparking some interesting conversations of the "don't assume I liked him because I'm American" variety, I didn't see it affecting my connection to the US, even if I felt that the direction my country was going was worrisome, nor do I let my pride in my birth country "control me". I'm the daughter of an American history teacher (who spent a few years writing speeches for congress); I'm the grand-daughter of immigrants who came to American for a better life (and found one), and I am diligent about voting in US elections still because it's both a right and a responsibility. In fact, my banging on about how important voting is has gotten three of my UK friends to vote for the first time ever! (It was all LibDem, and now we all feel a bit foolish, but still!).
None of this has any bearing on me being over the top or uncaring about others, and none of it has prevented me from falling in love with living in the UK.
I think patriotism is more about caring deeply about making your country a better place than feeling as if your country is better than some other place.