I hate being pushed around in the supermarket.

Oh dear. I wish I hadn't read this thread. I am a polite shopper but I am a man on a mission. The problem is I don't know UK food. I move in a few weeks and one of my favorite activities is shopping because I like dreaming up things to make.

I am going to need to find somewhere I can go and a time to go that isn't busy it looks like. I don't like run-ins!

I was just remembering that in the US if a stranger saw that I was carrying something that looked heavy they would come up to me and insist that they help me, whether I wanted them to or not.

Huh? Where does that happen? I've never experienced it.

I do think that British politeness has deteriorated some in the last 30 - 40 years. Don't see so much orderly queuing at bus stops, for instance.

Oh dear. I wish I hadn't read this thread. I am a polite shopper but I am a man on a mission. The problem is I don't know UK food. I move in a few weeks and one of my favorite activities is shopping because I like dreaming up things to make.

I am going to need to find somewhere I can go and a time to go that isn't busy it looks like. I don't like run-ins!

Don't worry - it's not really that bad. You'll be fine! 

I was just remembering that in the US if a stranger saw that I was carrying something that looked heavy they would come up to me and insist that they help me, whether I wanted them to or not.

Huh? Where does that happen? I've never experienced it.

This has happened to me a lot in the US when I was carrying my harp, but the cynical side of me said it had more to do with being an attractive female than anything else (judging by who offered the help!)  

I do think that British politeness has deteriorated some in the last 30 - 40 years. Don't see so much orderly queuing at bus stops, for instance.

Just today at the doctor's office I was waiting patiently for my turn at the receptionist's desk while a woman was frantically trying to make an appointment for her friend who had addiction problems.  I gave them some space since it seemed very personal and didn't want to make the friend uncomfortable by hearing everything.  After I'd been waiting a bit, a woman *stepped in front of me and into the space I was leaving the two women* and acted like she was next in the queue!  The receptionist turned to me and said, "I haven't forgotten that you were next".  That was very professional of her.  the queue jumper may not have seen me, but I was *right there*.

This has happened to me a lot in the US when I was carrying my harp, but the cynical side of me said it had more to do with being an attractive female than anything else (judging by who offered the help!) 
Just today at the doctor's office I was waiting patiently for my turn at the receptionist's desk while a woman was frantically trying to make an appointment for her friend who had addiction problems.  I gave them some space since it seemed very personal and didn't want to make the friend uncomfortable by hearing everything.  After I'd been waiting a bit, a woman *stepped in front of me and into the space I was leaving the two women* and acted like she was next in the queue!  The receptionist turned to me and said, "I haven't forgotten that you were next".  That was very professional of her.  the queue jumper may not have seen me, but I was *right there*.

Queue jumpers are the worst!  I have this theory that the people in NYC aren’t initially rude, that it’s the subway that makes them that way.  I can’t tell you how many times I’ve literally been pushed aside so that someone could go in front of me in the turnstile just to watch them not be able to get their card to swipe.  The subway definitely brings the worst out in me and I’m slightly embarrassed (only slightly) to admit the horrible names I find myself calling people.  I don’t remember it being as bad when I lived in Kips Bay and just took the 6, but the 4/5 at 86th street is a nightmare!

When I chimed in earlier I didn’t mention that for some reason (maybe an assisted living type place) there is a huge number of elderly people at my supermarket, all the time.  It drives me up the wall when they won’t move when I say excuse me several times and loudly, or when they argue over $0.10 when the line is miles long.  I’ve even had someone step in front of me in line and then turn and tell me that they have less things so they get to go first.  My reply was ‘actually you don’t’ and I pushed passed them. 

Just today at the doctor's office I was waiting patiently for my turn at the receptionist's desk while a woman was frantically trying to make an appointment for her friend who had addiction problems.  I gave them some space since it seemed very personal and didn't want to make the friend uncomfortable by hearing everything.  After I'd been waiting a bit, a woman *stepped in front of me and into the space I was leaving the two women* and acted like she was next in the queue!  The receptionist turned to me and said, "I haven't forgotten that you were next".  That was very professional of her.  the queue jumper may not have seen me, but I was *right there*.

DO NOT get me started on queue jumpers!!  They are one of my biggest pet hates here!!  I hate when I'm waiting for a bus and people just walk past you and stand at the front of the queue.  

The only time anyone has ever stopped to help me carry anything was in Paris, when I was lugging a giant suitcase up some steps in the Gare du Nord.  However, I don't extrapolate from that experience that Parisians are more polite than anyone in the UK and the US.  

As for the supermarkets, there certainly is order to where the items are placed in UK ones.  If it's different from the order used in American supermarkets, well, it's a different country.  It's just a question of getting used to where things are, which frankly isn't hard.  I shop mostly at Waitrose, and while people are sometimes a bit un-self-aware, I've never found them to be rude.  Even at Tesco on Saturday where it gets really crowded, no one has been noticeably rude.  

In many cases like this I feel that you get what you expect to find.  

As for the supermarkets, there certainly is order to where the items are placed in UK ones.  If it's different from the order used in American supermarkets, well, it's a different country.  It's just a question of getting used to where things are, which frankly isn't hard.

No, but it's a common ploy in supermarkets and other shops to keep moving things around, presumably to get the customers to pick up something they wouldn't have otherwise while looking for their intended quarry. 

This has happened to me a lot in the US when I was carrying my harp, but the cynical side of me said it had more to do with being an attractive female than anything else (judging by who offered the help!)  

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This happened to me constantly in the US. As I said, practically evey week when I did my grocery shopping.

I am a petite woman and probably look more fragile than I am.

I look the same in the UK as in the US, though.

It's a common ploy in supermarkets and other shops to keep moving things around, presumably to get the customers to pick up something they wouldn't have otherwise while looking for their intended quarry.  

Yes!
I have lived in the UK for 6 years and have shopped at the same Morrisons weekly for the vast majority of that time.  

Items are constantly being moved around.

I’ve had workers wander around looking for things when I’ve asked them where something was because they didn’t know.

while people are sometimes a bit un-self-aware, I've never found them to be rude

What do you consider to be the difference between being un-self-aware and being rude?

I’ve certainly never had anyone intentionally push me hard, shout at me, insult me, etc.

What about the couple who stand in front of the shelf having a conversation while people behind them are trying to get things?

What about the queue jumper who doesn’t check to see if anyone else was waiting before them and assumes they are first?

What about the guy I saw this weekend casually strolling around the aisles while listening to his ipod?

What about the woman who let her daughter ride her scooter down the aisles till the daughter fell and started crying? (Happened the week before.)

When does un-self-aware become rude?

I think that being polite, by definition, means being aware of, and considerate of, other people.

Don't worry - it's not really that bad. You'll be fine!  

Definitely. I wouldn’t even have thought about it if it wasn’t for this thread. You will get used to the way things are done.

I’ve certainly never had any confrontations with people,  just been annoyed.
I was much more annoyed when I first moved here. Now I am used to things and would probably not be used to a US supermarket.

I find people annoying in any country!  They just walk around like - you know, people being people.

Although I've not found people more rude here I know I struggle trying to pass others, maybe because, even on foot, I'm used to left to left? As for the iPod thing, when I first got here I was REALLY anxious anytime I went out, even just to the shops, and truly the only thing that let me cope was always having my headphones in. I just couldn't handle the sensory overload. I'm not saying that is what that young man is doing, but you never know what is going on with others. My husband and are friends are fairly universally considerate people; of course, that's why they're my husband and friends!

I find people annoying in any country! 

I find people annoying in any country!  They just walk around like - you know, people being people.

I love this too!  In fact, I could make a list by country!  But I won’t, as it would be mean and not come across the way it was meant to!

Although I've not found people more rude here I know I struggle trying to pass others, maybe because, even on foot, I'm used to left to left?

I've figured out the passing thing.

In New York City I would take in the whole scene around me, looking at all the people around me and constantly making little adjustments in my position to avoid bumping into anyone.

So, for example, if I saw that someone was at the end of the street and slowly walking towards me, if they were slightly to the right of me I would shift a little bit to  my left. Then, if I noticed someone else toward my left, I would move a little bit to the right but not far enough to bump into the first person.

I would base my movements on the position of every person I could see, so that, for example, I could weave in and out between people in a crowded subway station without bumping into anyone.

I made these little movements constantly, and it seems like other people did this too.

My experience here in York is that people walk straight ahead in one direction until they are just about to collide head on with someone. Only then do they move aside.

Once, when I was walking down the street, there was a woman behind me and I kept trying to step to the side to let her pass because I felt like she was walking right on top of me. Eventually, she did pass me and she told me off for not walking in a straight line.
It used to be a habit for me to step to one side when I saw someone coming along my path. I expected that they would step over to the other side so we would both have room.
I found that they would instead stride along the centre of the path, taking up most of the space, while I would be squished into the side of the footpath.
So now I just keep walking straight ahead until someone is just about to get close to me, and then move aside just enough to avoid bumping them, then continue along my original path.
It works. I don’t get bumped and I don’t get squished into a tiny space, either.

You think about this a lot, don't you, sweetpeach?