So how did you meet? Well...

But I have also said "we met online" and been met with this response: " .... okay..." It depends on the person and what they have heard or read about online relationships.

My stepdad still kind of thinks this, I think, despite all my relationships originating online (curse of being a shy computer geek attracted other shy computer geeks ). I think now he realises that it doesn't mean they're psycho or anti-social, but he still can't quite wrap his head around how you would go about meeting someone that way.

Actually, for us it was on Facebook of all places. It actually makes sense when you think that if you are sharing similar interest information on FB that you will come across like-minded people - and that's what happened to us - through a joke I told.

Usually the response I receive when telling someone how we met is quite positive - everyone seems open to it. But when I tell them she's in England (I'm in the States) and it's a LDR is when the interesting responses come. The ones one I hear most often is "How does that work?" and "LDRs never work out."

But when I tell them she's in England (I'm in the States) and it's a LDR is when the interesting responses come. The ones one I hear most often is "How does that work?" and "LDRs never work out."

Like historyenne, I met my boy in person (and agree that we're probably a minority, here!). But after our first 6 months of dating in the UK, I returned to the US, and those responses are the same things people told me.  Gladly, they were wrong, as being in an LDR probably strengthened our relationship and forced us to talk honestly and openly about everything. At the time, my friends and housemates were just having flings, (which always fizzled) because they never really got to know the person the way you can through an LDR.

I honestly wouldnt worry about what people think of how you met. It's your story and you should tell it, because it's obviously been romantic and meant something to the two of you

I think that when people ask you how you met, it's because they like to hear romantic stories. I don't think they are being judgemental.(Unless it's an i.o., of course.)

But when I tell them she's in England (I'm in the States) and it's a LDR is when the interesting responses come. The ones one I hear most often is "How does that work?" and "LDRs never work out."

My niece has a crush on a boy from a school 20 miles away from where she lives. She is in the throes of woe because 'if we dated, we'd never get to see each other... we are too far away... etc'. I just giggled and reminded her that her uncle and I made it work from 4000 miles away from each other.

I think that when people ask you how you met, it's because they like to hear romantic stories. I don't think they are being judgemental.(Unless it's an i.o., of course.)

I think a lot of people do like to hear romantic stories, but I have a difficult time believing that they find the story to be romantic when they proceed to make rude comments or funny faces. Some think it's romantic and some find it odd. I can tell you from personal experience that IOs are not the only group of people who are judgmental about LDRs and Cyberdating. However, I think more people are supportive and positive than not. It's probably just easier to remember the negative stories.

From my experience, people question less the LDR and more the meeting online.  Like, being in a LDR with a UKC you met while doing a year abroad in the UK is somehow more "acceptable" than being in a LDR with a UKC you met online.

I also met my BF in person, but that didn't stop people from being incredibly suspicious of him in the beginning.  When I went to go visit him for the first time since we had met, I can't count how many people said something along the lines of "Better hope he's not an axe murderer!". 

I also got a lot of weird looks with the LDR thing for a while.  Many of the people I knew in the US just didn't get it, and if I had been them I'm not sure I would have gotten it either. 

I tend to be pretty evasive about it in general, but it's due to the fact that I don't want people to know my business. When people ask, I say "We were staying at the same place in Berlin" and leave it at that.  For friends, I elaborate, but otherwise...*shrug*

From my experience, people question less the LDR and more the meeting online.  Like, being in a LDR with a UKC you met while doing a year abroad in the UK is somehow more "acceptable" than being in a LDR with a UKC you met online.

I guess it is true that people were more accepting of me having met someone in person rather than online, but it is something that people still find questionable.  I once had someone ask very personal questions about how I "satisfy my needs."  I declined to answer, but I find that by nature, people are just curious.  Some take it past being curious and start to pry into every detail though.

I think it's important to just dodge whatever questions make you feel uncomfortable, whether it's about how you met, what it's like to be in an LDR, or any other detail that you might like to keep private.

Not knowing the ages of all the people posting here, I wonder if there is an age issue involved.

I was 38 when I decided to travel to the UK to meet someone I had only known online and then  became engaged to him.

Maybe people are less likely to questions a 38-year-old's decisions about their romantic future than they are to question a 25-year-old's.

Oh man. I could have written your original post myself. It gets annoying, embarrassing and downright frustrating to have people ask you this all of the time. I want to just smile and say "How did you meet your wife?" and put them on the spot instead. It's like, I've only known you for five minutes and will probably never see you again. Why do you have to be so nosy? Someone who was booking me into A & E even asked us! Geez! As if I didn't have more pressing things going on. I imagine even after I've lived here 20 years people will still ask. But now instead of telling them how we met online (which I think is a great story and love to tell my true friends or people I expect to be a part of my life for more than a few days) I just tell them we met in London on holiday and change the subject. We did meet in person in London and we were both on holiday, so...  Usually that puts an end to it.

Not knowing the ages of all the people posting here, I wonder if there is an age issue involved.

I was 38 when I decided to travel to the UK to meet someone I had only known online and then  became engaged to him.

Maybe people are less likely to questions a 38-year-old's decisions about their romantic future than they are to question a 25-year-old's.

I'm 35 and people still ask me loads of questions about it. 

So you did meet online, but instead you've made up a story that you met through a mutual friend?

Hmm...I find it really strange that you feel you have to make up a story rather than be honest!  I don't see the problem in saying how you met online.  Who cares if people make a big deal out of it or find it odd...in this day and age, it's really not unusual at all.

I agree that it isn't a big deal, but often it leads to so many other questions, like which web site you met on and what you were doing there and all sorts of stuff like that. In our case, we met on Second Life which is a virtual world and kind of hard to explain to someone who has never been on there. Sometimes I do say we met online and just say we were playing a game and just started chatting, but other times, I just give the London on holiday story to strangers because I'll never see them again anyway and I'd rather just cut that conversation short as it feels far too personal to talk about my relationship and all the particulars to someone I just said hello to. 

I agree that it isn't a big deal, but often it leads to so many other questions, like which web site you met on and what you were doing there and all sorts of stuff like that. In our case, we met on Second Life which is a virtual world and kind of hard to explain to someone who has never been on there.

Yep. We were both members at Funtrivia, both the quiz part and forums. Things started going a bit haywire on there with some control freaks, so hubby decided to start his own forum. We were aware of each other but didn't interact much, but when he and the two people he started his forum with were looking for mods, a mutual online friend of ours from Canada suggested me, and within three months I'd become Admin. We all talked on MSN messenger and could find other admin or mods to talk to 24 hours a day with all the time zones, and after a few months he and I started having our own chat going without the others, and it took off from there. It is time consuming to explain all of that to people you will probably never speak to again, or rarely see. For those people I just say we were introduced by a mutual online friend. Some people also have to have the whole forum concept explained to them in addition to the rest of the story. I don't mind telling people who are or will be involved in my life the lengthy version.

It does feel weird to explain such an intimate detail at length with strangers. The way I see it, in past relationships I was rarely asked how we met because we were always from the same area, or at least the same state. Now, everyone wants to know, and some act as though they are entitled to know and press for more details than I want to give to a stranger.

Bluebell- I understand where you're coming from! I find when I tell people I barely know or ones I don't keep in touch with that often they usually go "Oh really?" or "Hmm, how does that work?" lol But for the most part everyone compares our story to a fairytale To be honest I feel like we're a real couple, with real lives and real, normal issues The fairytale compliment is sweet and very lovely to say though. I think the people in my life were curious to know how it worked (me living here, him in the UK) and what website we met off of. Most of of my gf's think I have a great catch in Phil and I must say I agree! We're not afraid to tell people how we met, but we do dislike some of the reactions we get. I guess the only advice I have for you is to not let what others say/think get to you. Take the positive comments as a compliment and brush off the negativity. You shouldn't feel that you have to lie about how you two met, be proud you landed yourself a sexy and sweet Brit, reguardless how it happened!

We met online, also, at the Yahoo.com date site (when it existed). I've never had anyone act negative about it when I told them. They think it's pretty neat.  I was so "head over heels" in love, I remember taking the laundry basket down to my basement to do laundry, then realizing I hadn't put any clothes in it. LOL