My dog died and I just found out today

This was the staff cross lab that I re-homed. I didn't keep in touch for a year because I was trying to let go. Then I sent a message today to see how he was and the owner said she had him put down because of cancer spreading through his legs.

I'm so upset and I don't know how such a young dog (2.5 yrs) can have cancer. I don't know anything about it. I'm scared I'm being lied to and she actually gave him away or something else. She unfriended me on facebook shortly after we stopped talking and I figured it was only because we didn't know each other well but there's just something that doesn't feel right.

Am I just in denial because something I love is dead? I've never really dealt with anyone I love being dead so is this normal?

Any support would be appreciated.

Aw, poor dog.

I know it's hard, but I think you'll have to take her explanation at face value. Even if he has been re-homed, that doesn't mean his new home is necessarily bad. And why tell you he had cancer? That seems a pretty harsh cover story to come up with.

I've lost a couple of horses quite young (4 and 8, normal lifespan is 20-30), and it's really, really tough. My first mare who died (age 8, broken leg) was the worst - it took me a good 2-3 years to really get over it, and I still miss her today (10 years after she died).

((Hugs))

I'm so sorry.  No advice to give, but big hugs to you!

I'm so sorry, GibbyGab. 

So sorry GibbyGab     and yes they can get cancers at that early age.  Take care and hope you feel better soon.

Thank you so much everyone. You have really helped me feel at ease. You're absolutely right I was being ridiculous with my suspicions. I'm just in shock because he was our little guy. It was bad enough rehoming him but to know he's just gone kills me since I predicted him having at least 10 more years or so. She told me he's had a great life though while he was alive. I believe her too because she was great with him. Thanks again for the support guys

Thank you so much everyone. You have really helped me feel at ease. You're absolutely right I was being ridiculous with my suspicions. I'm just in shock because he was our little guy. It was bad enough rehoming him but to know he's just gone kills me since I predicted him having at least 10 more years or so. She told me he's had a great life though while he was alive. I believe her too because she was great with him. Thanks again for the support guys

Sometimes when bad things happen, you want to believe anything but the truth to protect yourself because it feels so bad It's really natural, but I think in this situation it was just horrible and tragic thing to happen to your little pup. You did the best you could for him and gave him to someone who sounds like they were great with him, and he had a lovely life until he got sick, which would have happened no matter where he was.

Sorry it had to happen love Cancer sucks.

So sorry, G G.

Sometimes when bad things happen, you want to believe anything but the truth to protect yourself because it feels so bad It's really natural, but I think in this situation it was just horrible and tragic thing to happen to your little pup. You did the best you could for him and gave him to someone who sounds like they were great with him, and he had a lovely life until he got sick, which would have happened no matter where he was.

Sorry it had to happen love Cancer sucks.

Thanks CB that really helped. You're right about everything. I'm dreading telling DH when he comes home. He never got over the sadness of re-homing him. I don't know how he'll take this sh*t news .

Sorry to hear about your dog GibbyGab.  

I know how you feel.  I have been fostering guinea pigs for about a year.  I rehomed three with a family about 10 months ago.  Last week I contacted them and found out that two of the guinea pigs had died.  She didn't even tell me how.  It has definitely made me suspicious because one of them I estimated at only 1-2 years old, but I guess it's plausible.  I just wish she could have given me a proper explanation.  The best you can do though, is just to make sure you ask the right questions when you rehome them, and after that, it's out of your hands.

Hi guys, an update. I went on this person's facebook and the story she told me doesn't add up to a comment she made under a photo of my dog that she has up. I'm kind of freaking out now. She told me that he spent his last days with her and all this other detail but under the photo she said that she actually re-homed him and gave him to a couple. I'm now unsure of why she lied to me and frankly I feel sick like I made a horrible decision. I don't know why she told me he's dead. From the date the comment was made she said he's doing well. So why upset me with the worst possible news of him getting cancer and then suffering and being put down? I don't know what to do. Do you think she just told me that out of embarassment of re-homing him again or something? I'm shaking because the worst thoughts are running through my mind right now.

Hi guys, an update. I went on this person's facebook and the story she told me doesn't add up to a comment she made under a photo of my dog that she has up. I'm kind of freaking out now. She told me that he spent his last days with her and all this other detail but under the photo she said that she actually re-homed him and gave him to a couple. I'm now unsure of why she lied to me and frankly I feel sick like I made a horrible decision. I don't know why she told me he's dead. From the date the comment was made she said he's doing well. So why upset me with the worst possible news of him getting cancer and then suffering and being put down? I don't know what to do. Do you think she just told me that out of embarassment of re-homing him again or something? I'm shaking because the worst thoughts are running through my mind right now.

Sweetheart, just ask her, don't get upset about things you don't know for sure yet.

Just say "Hello, I was looking for pictures of our dog, because I wanted to remember him, and I noticed this comment on your Facebook...Please can you let me know if he was rehomed, or if he genuinely died from Cancer, or both? I wont be angry either way, but I would like to know the truth. Thank you GG"

Let us know how it goes x

Sweetheart, just ask her, don't get upset about things you don't know for sure yet.

Just say "Hello, I was looking for pictures of our dog, because I wanted to remember him, and I noticed this comment on your Facebook...Please can you let me know if he was rehomed, or if he genuinely died from Cancer, or both? I wont be angry either way, but I would like to know the truth. Thank you GG"

Let us know how it goes x

thanks CB. I basically just copied and pasted (tweaked a bit) what you said above. I hope she won't ignore me. If she does though, should I just let go? Or should I keep pursuing this? Is there even anything I can do? I just want to calm down and not have to worry or think about this anymore. You have helped loads as you always do with all my problems . You're a gem!

thanks CB. I basically just copied and pasted (tweaked a bit) what you said above. I hope she won't ignore me. If she does though, should I just let go? Or should I keep pursuing this? Is there even anything I can do? I just want to calm down and not have to worry or think about this anymore. You have helped loads as you always do with all my problems . You're a gem!

Unless you can figure out where he's been rehomed to, I don't think you have a choice but to let it go. You could stalk all her FB friends, I suppose, and hope that if you find the dog via pictures whoever has him won't mind you coming across like a crazy stalker person. That's assuming that their account is public, etc.

Best case scenario - you find the pup, he's alive, and maybe he needs a new home. Can you give him one? Can you give his owner a few hundred quid to help pay for food/vet bills/whatever? If so, definitely pursue it. If not, I'd just try and let it go (unless you wanted to try and get the RSPCA involved or something).

Worst case scenario - you find out he did die, or got rehomed someplace awful, or both, and can't do anything about it. Then you're left feeling really bad, still.

I know it's really hard not knowing all the information, but if this woman ends up being stubborn, and/or FB stalking doesn't work, you won't be able to find out anything anyway.

Good luck!