Trying to get things sorted....

My name is Brandi and I am currently living in San Diego having a relationship with the love of my life who resides in Oldham.  I stumbled upon this site and am learning so much by just reading everything.  Here is my situation.....
David and I met on a chat site in 2010.  It was not a romantic relationship... we were just excellent friends from the very start.  He made his first journey to San Diego in Jan of the following year.  When we actually laid eyes on each other and as I kissed him on the cheek, it was as if we were both inundated with animated bluebirds and hearts.  We have been going back and forth for two years, and made the decision to try to work it out so that we can just be together.  We eloped in March here in San Diego.  Now comes the hard part...
David has a 21 year old son and a very good job where he has worked for over 10 years.  I am currently unemployed and have 4 daughters, aged 22, 19, 16 and 10.  The two older girls are out of the house (in college).  The 16 (almost 17) year old has a wonderful boyfriend and has expressed without reservation that she will not move to England and leave the boyfriend behind.  Economically, it would be in our best interest to move to Oldham.  There are things that I need to investigate, however, such as schools and such.  But the hard part would be tearing my family apart. 
I have not submitted papers yet for David's visa because, honestly, I am not certain how this story will end just yet.  Any advice, information regarding transferring schools and the quality of education in the UK, immigration, etc would be of great help.  We are planning a wedding ceremony in the UK in June of next year and I would obviously like to know what my plans will be by that time.
Thanks in advance for any and all that you have to share.

Welcome to the forum.

It seems like you and your husband and families need to really come to a decision as to which country you want to live in.  Because you don't want to go back and forth and apply for visas and such without really planning on moving. You say you're going to apply for a visa for your husband to come to the US, but you also say it would make more sense to move to the UK.  So I think you need to think about and talk about this very important decision before you start thinking about visas.

Exactly....  That is why we haven't done so as of yet.  His main concern s of Bella, my youngest.  He wants to make sure that she will have the best education and will adjust to the new family situation with ease.  Neither of us is too concerned with geography.  He has been in Oldham his whole life, and I in San Diego.  I would gladly give up the fine weather for the amazing people, and he feels the same.... 

I know we probably come off as being wishy-washy, but the fact is that we simply want to be together...  regardless of where.

You should also probably make sure you are eligible for the visa in each country.  In the UK, your spouse needs to have a job with a minimum amount of income to sponsor you for the visa.  Does your daughter's father approve of her moving to the UK, or do you have sole custody of her?  You would need explicit permission to take her out of the country.

I am not sure of the requirements for the US visa but don't you need to be able to financially sponsor someone for the spousal visa? 

I know we probably come off as being wishy-washy, but the fact is that we simply want to be together...  regardless of where.

I agree with geeta.

You need to first make a decision what country to move to; make lists of the pros and cons in each country if you have to.  I know the feeling of wanting to be together as soon as possible no matter where, but it really is best to have a serious and long discussion about it.  The last thing you want to do is to spend lots of time and money moving to one country thinking it doesn't matter which one so long as you are together, only to change your mind and decide you want or need to move back for whatever reason - and will have to spend even more time and money moving a second time.