NHS and resident status

My husband and I could move to the US tomorrow, but then you would say that we are abandoning HIS family.  We can't win with you.

Does the US allow next day spouse visas? I thought it took nearly a year to get a spouse visa to the US, even with finances in place??

Does your husband have siblings who live in the UK who could care for his parents when they get old?

If you are an only child and you move to a country that doesn't allow chain migration (or a country tha then perhaps these things should be thought about when you decide you want to settle in that country.

Seriously Susan. It's a figure of speech. She's making a point, not a plan.

I personally hope you realise most people don't move countries on a whim.

I'm not really sure what you're trying to suggest and why, but your posts come across as quite condescending and disrespectful. I'm not sure if that's how you intend it, but that's how it reads to me..... I'm sure I'm not the only one....

So much hate, so little time! 

Does the US allow next day spouse visas? I thought it took nearly a year to get a spouse visa to the US, even with finances in place??

I wanted to deduct a few style points for this bit of feigned ignorance as it is too transparent. But the last bit where you casually prod every human's natural concern for a sick or ageing parent is so acrid that it makes up for the slight slip in tone.   

Susan you are an artist.

I come from a family of realists. If you move abroad, you should talk about these things beforehand. It's what my family does if one of the family is going abroad for a year or two with work or, if they move to another country. We don't only talk about parents getting old, we talk about how they and the family would handle it, if a family member was very ill or dying in another country.

At the moment my little teenage niece is seriously ill in Australia and the family are taking it in turns to fly out for the lengh of a visitor visa and stay with my sister to support her, as we always planned to do if this happened to anyone abroad.

If the family don't talk about these things beforehand, then all sorts of things crop up that people are not prepared for.

So much hate, so little time! 

You can't help it.

I too like realism, as an artistic clan does your family prefer Millet or Von Herkomer?

I hope I understand you correctly I might be confused.

/I must admit I have no idea who Von Herkomer is, but I think Eddie Von Herkomer would be a cool band name.

Susan I am getting more and more fascinated. Do you and your family plan for every eventuality? I'm just trying to get around the logistics of all the different permutations and combinations. What if two family members are sick but on two different continents? What if one gets falsely imprisoned or stranded on an island. I mean do you have contingencies for that? Is there like a family 'reserve squad' held back for insertion if something goes wrong? Like, "Susan you have to stay home Wednesdays and Thursdays to man the phones'? What about budgets? Do you have a slush fund to cover emergency travel? I am worried that if even one family member begins to shirk, confidence in the whole familial rescue system could erode. That way lies anarchy.

I come from a family of realists. If you move abroad, you should talk about these things beforehand. It's what my family does if one of the family is going abroad for a year or two with work or, if they move to another country. We don't only talk about parents getting old, we talk about how they and the family would handle it, if a family member was very ill or dying in another country.
If the family don't talk about these things beforehand, then all sorts of things crop up that people are not prepared for.

Well, when I moved the retired person visa still existed and my dad was alive and didn't have brain cancer, so we thought it would be possible for my parents to move over if they wished after my dad retired. When he died, we still thought my mum could move, but they got rid of the retired persons visa (which, by the way, required you to have private health insurance until you got ILR and an annual income of at least £25,000 pa, so not exactly for spongers) before she was old enough. We couldn't have planned for these events at the time. And sometimes stuff happens, there's a job loss or an unexpected health problem and suddenly you can't afford to go halfway across the world to take care of relatives. Circumstances can change and sometimes no amount of planning can make up for them, and for some people living in the US (or whatever country the immigrant is from) isn't an option for a variety of reasons. How great for you that your whole family is sufficiently well off to take turns spending long intervals in Australia to help out, but not everybody has the means to do that, even if they are otherwise able to live comfortably. However, considering your past posts, you probably just think they don't work hard enough and can just pick up a bunch of extra jobs (since there are so many available) so they can afford to do so.

International couples live in a cruel world.....Someone's family is always gonna feel left out.  And as excited as I was to move to England, mostly to be with my husband again as I don't actually care where we live together, it broke my heart to leave my family.  I have 1 blood grandparent left and some that are grandparents by marriage.  It will kill me if/when they pass and I am not there.  Same for my parents.  Susan it is very ignorant to think that we all haven't thought about and talked about it with our spouses and our families.  This was the hardest decision we had to make.  I cried my eyes out with my parents over it.  But some of us didn't choose to relocate to another country.  Some of us were forced do to issues out of our control.  Thinking before one makes a broad statement will help in the future unless you meant to offend several people......

It's all been said - unfortunately Nancy, the OP, is unable to make it to the UK to live close to her family which totally sucks. We're moving into a new territory, so I'm locking this thread.