Mixed Feelings

So I made the decision, because of a great job opportunity and partner always wanted an American adventure, to move back to the States. I have been here for a little over four years now and the UK feels like my home. It's strange that I sometimes find it hard to remember my life before Britain. Anyway, we are applying for DCF in London in December and hope to be back to the States by May or June. I guess the reason I am writing this is because I am starting to feel really sad. I know that the move will be great for us financially and really great for my career, but somehow I am still sad. We don't plan to make the move permanent and to be honest, I would love to be back in 3-4 years...but I'm still having cold-feet. I wonder if this is normal..Has anyone else had theses feelings? When I went back to the States to visit family and friends in July, it just didn't feel the same. It wasn't bad, but just wasn't what I remember. I'd appreciate anyone with motivating words for me! :-) I'm definitely needing some right now!

Whenever you live in more than one place for any length of time you end up feeling torn.
Which ever place you are at eventually feels like "home" and the other place less so.  It's a question of acclimatization.  I don't know if people who have lived in many different places have this problem, but it is certainly true of one or two moves.  And I don't think that flitting between the two places constantly helps -- that will only do your head in.  I have a theory that no matter where you end up, if you live there long enough, you will eventually regard it as "home" even if it's only a cardboard box.  It becomes your cardboard box and you do get over the uneasy thoughts of anywhere else.  But that's just a theory. 

A couple of months ago, my husband decided he would like to try living in the US.  This came out of left field as we had decided to live in the UK permanently.  We won't do anything before I have citizenship which is still several years away.  But the idea of moving back to the US is slightly terrifying to me.  I did not enjoy my first two years in the UK but now I'm quite happy.  Yeah, I'd love to improve the weather but I've made some great friends now, have a job I love, and and just at peace living here.  So, yeah, I know exactly how you feel.

Get citizenship before you go!

Thank you both for your comments, much appreciated. I feel like this place is the only place you can really find people that know what you are going through. Even with my partner, he has never moved anywhere for an extended period, away from family or friends..so it is hard for him to understand.

BostonDiner, I think you have an amazing story...I read about your journey and funny enough, I am trying to do the same thing with regards to another EU citizenship. My grandfather was German and it appears I may be able to claim it from my mum. We are still in the process and finding birth records and marriage certificates is proving to be more difficult than anticipated...but I am hopeful.

And yes KFdancer, I feel the same. It was a bit tough for the first year, but I was at Uni and I suppose that helped as I was always around people my age and many of them international. But 4+ years on, I am still 4 years away from ILR as I was on Tier 4 and Tier 1 PSW visa prior. :-(

Anyway, writing about this helps...thank you both for your comments. :-)

Good luck with the German angle.