Divorce help required

Hi, I remember coming here a few years ago and managed to get a lot of fantastic help from everyone when my ex partner and I wanted to make the move to the UK.

Just a quick background of information. She is America, I am from England. We got married in Connecticut and then she came back to the UK here.

After a couple months of renting I bought a house with some help from my parents and we got on with our new life together. We shared the bills including mortgage and I personally paid for the ILR visa when that time came along in 2013, I cant off the top of my head remember but it was pretty expensive.
Anyway along comes 2014 and all of a sudden she tells me she is leaving me and going  back to the US because she doesnt Love me any more. Quite a shock but thankfully im over the initial sudden change of life.
I havnt heard from her over the last year with regards to a divorce but I knew it was coming. I december just before christmas she called and asked for £17,000 because what she believes she owes.
We chatted for a while and although I was upset with that number asked if she could think about that cost.

The other day she sent me a message telling me to confirm that I will send her £12,000 and for me to send a bunch of her items she left here at my expense.

Since we were married in the US and over the last year i've been working hard to keep my house and business running I havnt had a chance to look into what to do so im a little lost.

Hopefully someone can help, although she paid into the mortgage, even though we were married in the US and she is over there does she have ground to stand on when asking for a large sum of money?

Please feel free to ask asny questions.

You need to talk to a solicitor.

But yes, she will be entitled to half of everything including equity in the home.  Don't do or give her anything until you've had legal advice.

The fact that you were married in the US does not change anything.

You need to talk to a solicitor.

But yes, she will be entitled to half of everything including equity in the home.  Don't do or give her anything until you've had legal advice.

The fact that you were married in the US does not change anything.

The location of the marriage is moot but where the divorce is filed may be very relevant.  In the US depending on the state wherein the divorce is filed, there is no automatic split into half of assets.  Especially when the marriage was of short duration and when one party may have invested more heavily of pre marital assets.  I don't know UK divorce law at all.  But it may be in his best interest to let her file from the US, especially since it was his parents who helped them get a house.

Well another way of looking at it - how long will it take a couple of divorce lawyers to run up a £12K tab?

I wouldnt do anything just yet. If she feels she has a claim then let her detail it and present it in the proper manner. Dont go flying money everywhere just on a whim.

Are you actually considering sending someone £12k just because they asked?

Agree with rebeccajo - which US state she wants to file from can make a huge difference in what she's entitled to.

I didn't think you could file from the U.S. if the "marital life" was in the UK.  Otherwise, wouldn't everyone pick and choose where to get divorced based on favourable laws?

But I 100% wouldn't give her a penny without solid professional advice.

and for me to send a bunch of her items she left here at my expense.

At least send her her stuff.

At least send her her stuff.

Agreed.

Well i guess it depends what her stuff is and how much it weighs. If its unsubstantial then sure,send it..but if its going to cost a lot,you have to balance it with your personal budget. Of course if your very wealthy then its no issue.

Well i guess it depends what her stuff is and how much it weighs. If its unsubstantial then sure,send it..but if its going to cost a lot,you have to balance it with your personal budget. Of course if your very wealthy then its no issue.

True. But this guy...there's a bit of editorializing going on. Always a little suspicious of people post break-up who paint themselves as saints. "She just upped and left me."

He's asking for legal advice about jurisdiction, but slips things in like, "I bought a house with help from my parents." Is she on the mortgage? If so then a third party gave them money to buy a house together. He's making a case.

The "I am storing items at my expense," which may be a box of photos in a back room, seems petty.

If my wife ran off with a punk rock band, I'd at least send her her jumpers if she asked.

I didn't think you could file from the U.S. if the "marital life" was in the UK.  Otherwise, wouldn't everyone pick and choose where to get divorced based on favourable laws?

But I 100% wouldn't give her a penny without solid professional advice.

"Marital life" has nothing to do with it.  People divorce from outside jurisdictions (foreign or otherwise) every day of the week.  State law will dictate service of the paper work and Bob's your uncle.

"Marital life" has nothing to do with it.  People divorce from outside jurisdictions (foreign or otherwise) every day of the week.  State law will dictate service of the paper work and Bob's your uncle.

That's crazy!   

But this guy...there's a bit of editorializing going on. Always a little suspicious of people post break-up who paint themselves as saints. "She just upped and left me."

That's pretty unfair considering you don't know him or her.  I'd be wary of making any value judgements in a situation like this based on what one anonymous person wrote about the situation.