Just have vent-moving here has changed everything I thought about America!

@F4mandolin so tell me then, how am i wrong and what is your opinion of Americans?

Has anyone ever noticed how it's always the people who are full of complaints and generalisations about the UK and the people who live here who are on the receiving end of the anti-American comments? There's an obvious conclusion to be drawn from that . . .

No country is perfect, but if there's someone from a foreign place who is constantly emanating displeasure and critical of everything, then people are not going to be nice to that person or try to have a reasonable discussion of the merits and drawbacks of each country--they are going to react defensively. You keep saying that they are rude because they make these remarks to your face, but what are you doing to their faces?

Not everyone in the UK hates Americans. If everyone you're meeting seems to hate Americans, then sorry but the common factor is you. It's like the quote from Justified:

"If you meet an a**hole in the morning, you met an a**hole. If you meet a**holes all day, you're the a**hole"

Not calling you an a**hole, by the way, just saying that maybe you'd benefit from a bit of honest reflection about the kind of image you're presenting to those around you.

@historyenne wow, ok. then i guess all the other people on here complaining of the same thing must be jerks too. just below this thread is one about someone sick of hearing how Americans are stupid. But it must be just me right? Even though there are articles, books and TV shows (by Brits themselves) that are about how the British hate everyone, even each other.

And what planet are you living on where you think people in England, in particular south England, are friendly and nice? Either you havent lived there or are just arent perceptive.

And I've recieved many personal messages on here with people saying they know exactly how I feel and glad they aren't alone. Because this forum is about support and this thread about people's struggles. I'm listening and empathizing with people, not just dismissing their feelings and suggesting they are jerks.

If anyone is living up to the insular, un-caring American stereotype, it's you.

Well thanks for just insulting me - a Brit who is from the south of England and has lived in the UK (almost) her whole life.

I try to be friendly and nice when I can and I don't routinely go around being rude about Americans or my own country either. I have lived in the U.S. and I have American relatives myself.

Historyenne has lived in the UK for a number of years now and if I recall is also now a UK citizen herself.

The topic you mention about Americans being stupid is a satirical blog written by an American.


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@F4mandolin so tell me then, how am i wrong and what is your opinion of Americans?

Americans are very insular. When you live in the US, the vast majority of what you see and hear is about the US and until you spend a fair amount of time out of the US it is very difficult to get any other view. Too keep it real simple....Americans are just another group of people. They are not better than everybody....they aren't nicer than everybody.....they aren't meaner than everybody.....they're just Americans.....with tons of faults and good points....like every other country. Not to see that.....is ignorant. These comments are not meant to be insulting. I would be curious to know how many of the people who agree with your views have been living out of the US for very long. My experience (about 30 years in the UK/Germany/Japan working as a school teacher on US military bases....including Southern England) is that there are quite a few Americans who move to the UK (or Germany etc) and hate it and can't wait to get back to the US. There are also quite a few Americans who learn to live somewhere different and enjoy the experience. The ones who don't like their situation spend all their time talking about how horrible things are....or how rude people are....or that the weather is terrible. You are an unhappy person, but I do wish you well and hope things work out for you........ My last comment on this topic.....I'd rather spend my time dwelling on nice things.

@ksand24 ok fair enough on you but are you going to sit here and say, in general, are people from London/South England friendly?

Just like I'm not going to sit here and say Americans dont have a gun problem and are quiet and reserved? (which by the way I am but i know i'm not the norm)

To be honest, I've never really noticed either way whether they are friendly or not. It's not really my concern and it doesn't really matter to me either way. People are people - everyone is different and I take them as they are individually... Some people I click with, some I don't, some are friendly, some aren't... Just like anywhere else in the world.

I work with people from all over the UK and from other countries too and I don't really notice much of a  difference in levels of friendliness in relation to where they are from.


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@ksand24 you dont notice because you arent in the same position as some people are here. you dont know how hard it is to be an outsider and not have people let you in because you are not from here. that's what this forum is for, for people struggling with this. 

and i work with people from all over the world too and travel quite a bit for work and i disagree completely. i dont think it's the same everywhere. does every place have different kinds of people, yes but i think some places are more livable and happier than others.

Wow, historyenne, you just basically just insinuated that Lala (a person that you have never met before) is a b*tch/a**hole of some sort and that must be the reason why some of her Brit co-workers repeatedly say unnecessary and unpleasant things about her country and countrymen and women. Wow. Can't say I'm surprised...you always get the expat or two who blames the unhappy victim of Brit rudeness. My sense is that Lala does not want to be treated better than anyone else. She just wants to go to work, get things done, and have neutral, polite interactions with her co-workers. But she can't because some (not all) of the British people around her make what appear to be deliberately baiting rude remarks. If your hypothesis is true that Lala's conduct caused the Brits to react defensively, then maybe you think she can repair things by praising the superiority of everything that is English or British. Of course, she would be lying. And in any event I didn't read in her original post that she ever insulted the Brits around her. This is a private forum for American expats to vent (it's called the Airing Cupboard). I am sure that Lala does not treat her public workplace as an airing cupboard. So why assume she has misbehaved and brought upon herself this rudeness from her coworkers? You must be willfully blind, deaf, and dumb to refuse to believe that there is a pattern of anti-american bigotry in the UK. Just because it hasn't happened to you personally does not mean it hasn't happened to lots of other expats who have not brought it on themselves.

"If you meet an a**hole in the morning, you met an a**hole. If you meet a**holes all day, you're the a**hole"

Not calling you an a**hole, by the way, just saying

I can't really tell if she's calling her an a-hole or not....a lot of that sort of nuance flies over my head.

In all seriousness though, whether there is an anti-American bias or not, Lala should not be made to hear these things in her working environment. And like sexual harassment, the intentions of the speaker - whether they are joking or not - matter less than how they are received.

@sonofasailor yes exactly. it's so inappropriate, particularly at work. Also, it was pointed out to this person yesterday that maybe she should watch what she says, considering her boss is American (not me btw.) I thought its was a known rule (and surely against policies) to talk about someone's background.

Even aside from the office, on my way back home on the train, the two people sitting beside me and a group standing two seats down were also talking about Americans...at the same time!  But according to @historyenne, I must have made of sort of face or something to make them bring up the subject.

@shakeshack thanks for your comments I have a theory that some expats on here have a bit of self-hate or have taken on the superiority complex now that they fashion themselves "European" and not American anymore. Or they are just bullies. Why else go on to a thread about venting about living in the UK just to tell posters that they must have something wrong with them? it must be just to stir the pot or to prove (to yourself probably) how much better you are, which is really lame. it's one thing to offer some insight about seeing the brighter side of life but that's not what happened here.

For background, I've lived in southern England for seven years. I have loads of friends here. No one has ever been rude about the USA to my face. If anything, they're too pro-America, in the "Why would you ever leave that wondrous place to come to this rainy dump" sort of way. When I explain my reasons for moving, they say, "Well, OK, I guess, but I'd love to live in America!" Why would my experience be so radically different to Lalala's? How can two people living in the same place see things so differently? Logically, it has to do with differences in those two people, not in their surroundings.

Here's the thing: If one person reacts negatively to interaction with you, then it's likely due to some problem that person is having, but if everyone you interact with has the same negative reaction, then the balance of probability suggests that there's something in your behaviour that they are reacting to. That was the point of my Justified a**hole quote. Even if you're not intentionally doing anything, people can sense if you have extreme negative feelings about something, and they will react to that.

This is the only point I'm trying to make. But if you think it's more logical and more constructive to condemn an entire nation and everyone who lives there based on one very subjective criterion without giving any thought to other possible interpretations of the facts, well, that's on you and so are the consequences. I'll save my sympathy for people who need it.

@historyenne first of all, even your british friends say this place is a dump, even they think i'm right

And you are calling me out for condemning an entire nation and yet that is the very thing i am complaining about! except it's only offensive to you when it's aimed at the british.

and i have loads of friends here too, but all of them "damn foreigners." and it hasnt been lost of them that they dont have any british friends either.

i think even british people around you are saying the exact same thing i am, it's just one of us is paying attention

Why else go on to a thread about venting about living in the UK just to tell posters that they must have something wrong with them? it must be just to stir the pot or to prove (to yourself probably) how much better you are, which is really lame. it's one thing to offer some insight about seeing the brighter side of life but that's not what happened here.

Lala, if Historyenne reads this site as I do, by scrolling to the bottom of the first page under: UK Yankee Forum - Info Center and clicking 'View the most recent posts on the forum.' You can't help but see EVERYTHING that is being posted on. The posts are often on threads I don't care about at all.  I'd rather skip all the things I'm not interested in the new posts than go to the individual threads and and have to click in and out of them to catch up.

So yeah, I've seen this ENTIRE exchange. And I do have to say I've been discussing it with my British husband because I am bemused.