EXPEN$IVE

I know I am late into the conversation but when I moved here almost 11 years ago the fee I paid was nominal.  I think around $40.00.  I was gob smacked when my best friend told me that she paid over $400.00 only five years later.

£40!!!  wow!

Oh, you people should have tried this fifteen years ago. Phone calls were like a pound a minute! And flights-you must be joking. And there was no internet either. I laugh in the face of your mobile phone bills! We had to blinking move in order to see each other.

Oh, I understand - there is no way Phil & I could have done this at the very beginning, back in 1985.  It was just beyond us at that time and at that age.  I so understand about the phone bills.   

ee when i were a lad ...

Oh, you people should have tried this fifteen years ago. Phone calls were like a pound a minute! And flights-you must be joking. And there was no internet either. I laugh in the face of your mobile phone bills! We had to blinking move in order to see each other.

The voice of reason speaks ... 

well you dipstick Peedal you should have stayed single and gone to the movies all the time!!! 

Like me 

Sorry, I have to enjoy some of the perks of being single on this board sometimes!
 

There is also instant messenger which is free, if you've already got an internet connection.

I agree that the administrative fee is expensive,  but these things usually are.  I can't say whether it's more than they need, because I don't know how much they pay in overhead--salaries, building maintenance, rent etc., and how much is paid for by British taxes. I will tell you that the rent in that part of New York City  is amazingly high.  A one bedroom apartment can cost 1/2 a million dollars a month.

When we went to the British Embassy in NY last year we were there all day and the number of people immigrating was very very low.  The majority that we saw go through the doors were either student visas, people from countries that needed visas to travel through a british airport <-- vast majority.

If the fees were truely reflected upon the costs to cover overheads then the cost for the other such visas would be higher as well.  The immigrant visa's costs are so high because it is considered a non-essetial visa.  Basically the people don't NEED to immigrate.  They want to immigrate and because of this the British Govt. can charge a premium.  They have raised the fees to the point where it is high enough to be profitable but no so high as to be a deterrant or so high to make a visa beyond the reach of those of lower socio-economic standing.

Furthermore the embassy is not in NY as a favour to non-british citizens wanting visas.  It is an essential building for British Citizens who are in the USA.  It would be there even if it did not have powers to grant visas. 

Furthermore the embassy is not in NY as a favour to non-british citizens wanting visas. It is an essential building for British Citizens who are in the USA. It would be there even if it did not have powers to grant visas.

Excellent point!

I looked at the Visa fee for myself and two children as part of what needed to be done to complete the family unit. 

MAN i posted this like 2 weeks ago. HAHAH!

I am still upset. What i meant, now that i can speak with a less hot head. I dont mind being in a relationship that is costly, OF COURSE, but it juts gets so hard. Everything is backwards and forwards u have to stand on your head and then touch your nose and pick up a ball with ur teeth. U know whati  mean.
   THEN u have to wait  so long to see the other person( unless u are wicked rich) and the flying, i dont kno how to join a frequnet flyers thing. i am not in a big company.
  I also dont know what in the world is up sometimes.   If we get a fiance visa what kind of questions do they ask?  Its so expensive to get one too. almost 500 bucks! and then a plane ticket on top oif that and THEN u have to come back to the US after u are married. and dont forget the wedding costs money and dont u pay for documents andstuff! GOOD NESS LOL..
but i love it  i just  cant stand  being charged an arm and a leg for being in love.

 As for someone saying instant messanging is great! It is, its how i met my sweetheart, howeve its hard when  the time diffrence ( as u all know) is 8 hours  and when u love to hear their voice. u know..

I amlearning to budget my money and such and get a phone card and all that. and learning to say goodbye and not  whine about it.

  Shala

I think it's all relative.  I mean, yeah, if I added up all of the phone bills, plane tickets, wedding costs, visa costs, hotel bills, etc., I'd say I was insane for spending so much on a relationship.  BUT, I chose to build the relationship and the costs are a part of that.  So, in choosing the relationship, I chose to pay for it.

But really, when you think about it, there are ways to lessen the financial burden of an international relationship.  As someone already mentioned, you can stay with friends or family (or, hello, the person you're going to see!) rather than a hotel when visiting.  You can restrict your visits to the "off season" so you can get cheaper airfares.  You can have a simple civil ceremony to cut down on wedding costs.  You can sign up for a phone plan (I was with Sprint at 7 cents a minute and Cognidial at 4 cents a minute before 10-10-987) to save as much money as possible on your calls.  You can communicate solely via computer, saving on phone and postage costs.  The visa cost?  Well, I consider that a small price to pay in order to live with my husband without having to wait the better part of a year for permission to do so (hello, US immigration process!).

Basically, there's a cheaper way to do this, if you really want to.  It certainly doesn't make things any easier or faster though!

But really, as horrible as it sounds, if you can't afford/don't want to pay for an international relationship, don't get involved in one.  It doesn't make sense to me  when people complain about the cost when the cost is a direct result of the choices they've made (that's not directed at you Shala...just talking about people in general).

Yes you can choose whether to pursue an international relationship.  You can't choose who you fall in love with however. Once you're in love, what choice do you have but to pursue the relationship?  I don't see why one can't have a grumble about the expense and logisitical difficulties involved, it doesn't mean I wouldn't do it all again or that I don't think my husband is worth it - far from it, he's worth it a million times over and I don't think it is fair to imply that someone having a moan about the cost of a visa etc doesn't love their partner as much as someone who doesn't  moan.

I'm not implying that moaning about the cost means one doesn't love their partner.  I was just saying that there's no point in moaning about it because when one decides to pursue an international relationship, one knows that there is going to be significant cost involved.    It's like buying a car--I'd love to have drive a Bentley, but there's no way I can afford one, so I'm not gonna head down to the dealership and take one on a test drive. 

After reading all this I can say...thank God I'm already over here with a work visa!  If I meet someone over here to marry then at least I won't have some of the expense!

I'm not implying that moaning about the cost means one doesn't love their partner.  I was just saying that there's no point in moaning about it because when one decides to pursue an international relationship, one knows that there is going to be significant cost involved.    It's like buying a car--I'd love to have drive a Bentley, but there's no way I can afford one, so I'm not gonna head down to the dealership and take one on a test drive. 

I didn't necessarily mean you Lola, others had made the point earlier in the thread.  But going by this logic, then there's no point moaning about all the other issues associated with an international relationship, ie finding work in the other country, finding Mexican food in the other country etc etc.  I can't see anything wrong with letting off a bit of steam.

I didn't necessarily mean you Lola, others had made the point earlier in the thread.  But going by this logic, then there's no point moaning about all the other issues associated with an international relationship, ie finding work in the other country, finding Mexican food in the other country etc etc.  I can't see anything wrong with letting off a bit of steam.

Yeah, I do agree with you to a point (though I still wish there was a Taco Bell around here somewhere!  ).