Pooping in the UK (sorry!)

I fear this thread has not brought out the best in us. 
I'm especially sad that I posted a video of me on the beach without a single comment , but everyone has time to talk about poo!

I did not see that...  are you sure it posted?

I have found since becoming a mother, poop conversations are second nature.   

Phatbeetle, my first year here in the UK, my parents were visiting at Christmas.  On Christmas Day my dad blocked the one and only toilet in my house...  <sigh>  We managed that night after trying EVERYTHING we could think of to unblock it.  I didn't own a plunger of course...  We bought one early on Boxing Day and THAT didn't unblock it.  So finally had to break down and pay £350 for an emergency plumber to come out on Boxing Day to unclog it.  Took him about 5 minutes...     That was when I learned that tenants in the UK are basically responsible for anything and everything in a rental.   

Since you asked, here's a link
Some might call this a mid life crisis

https://r.tapatalk.com/shareLink?share_fid=39132&share_tid=89724&share_pid=1167884&url=http%3A%2F%2Ftalk%2Euk-yankee%2Ecom%2Findex%2Ephp%3Ftopic%3D89724%2Emsg1167884%23msg1167884&share_type=t

Move away from the poo

On Christmas Day my dad blocked the one and only toilet in my house...  <sigh> 

So what did he say?

"Whooooo doggie! Limme tell ya! Know any good plummers?"

"Better give that a few minutes before you go in "

So what did he say?

"Whooooo doggie! Limme tell ya! Know any good plummers?"

He was very sheepish.  What I hated is they left £350 in cash on the bedside table when they left.  They had already spent a fortune coming over at Christmastime.

This thread gave me a good giggle.  A couple weeks ago we visited family in France and unfortunately I was taken ill and the F***ING TOILET WOULD NOT FLUSH A SECOND TIME.  So embarrassing.  I had to hang out in the bathroom for like HALF AN HOUR until it would go again.  It's definitely an adjustment.

The other part of that story is that the next time I threw up I sought out a different bathroom but all it had in it was a bidet.  My husband was crying laughing.

Lol my best friend has stomach issues. At our wedding, she got drunk and sick it was er coming out both ends. She ended up throwing up in the bidet and her poor boyfriend [now husband] literally cleaned out the bidet.  Poor guy


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I did not see that...  are you sure it posted?

I have found since becoming a mother, poop conversations are second nature.   

I think that's fair to say. Puke, poop, pee lol not shy about them anymore.

I swear every time we go out and I take our daughter to the toilet it's for a poo. Once at an event, she wanted me to take a look at all the poo in the porter potty toilet



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Lol my best friend has stomach issues. At our wedding, she got drunk and sick it was er coming out both ends. She ended up throwing up in the bidet and her poor boyfriend [now husband] literally cleaned out the bidet.  Poor guy


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Yeah, my poor husband did the same.  But his reward was getting to remind me that this involved me asking, mid illness and with that terrible nausea headache, 'What's up with that crazy toilet in there?' 

Thanks all for your entertaining responses. In summary, it sounds like laying down some toilet paper on any potential landing areas might help. Other than that, it's normal to have to use the toilet brush to clean things off when you're done. (That's why it's there, I suppose.)

I'm sure it'll seem normal eventually. Cheers, thanks!

I must have the sense of humour of a six year old, because this thread has had me in absolute hysterics. Thank you all for the much needed giggle...

// bookmarks link for a rainy, dream day...

I must have the sense of humour of a six year old, because this thread has had me in absolute hysterics. Thank you all for the much needed giggle...

// bookmarks link for a rainy, dream day...

The immigrant experience.....you either cry or laugh...

But you know these....earthy things....sometimes shine a very poignant light:

What I hated is they left £350 in cash on the bedside table when they left. 

I can vividly see that stack of mixed notes left there...

Have you ever used one of those electronic toilets and shot a high pressured stream of water straight up your a**hole?  That's an experience! I got soaked as I jumped up terrified and it sprayed water all over my suit.  It was classy!  I enjoyed returning to the office after that experience...

I'm sorry, but I literally just burst out laughing upon reading this hahahaha

I'm sorry, but I literally just burst out laughing uppon reading this hahahaha

I just spent 2 weeks in Japan and many of the toilets there are electronic (well, the 'Western style' toilets are... the 'Japanese-style' ones are squat toilets).

They have music/running water sounds for 'privacy', plus the toilet seats are all electronically heated, and they have separate wash buttons men and women (the water angles towards different areas), plus some even have built-in dryers as well .

I must have the sense of humour of a six year old, because this thread has had me in absolute hysterics. Thank you all for the much needed giggle...

// bookmarks link for a rainy, dream day...

hahaha nooo I thoroughly enjoyed this thread as well!

I just spent 2 weeks in Japan and many of the toilets there are electronic (well, the 'Western style' toilets are... the 'Japanese-style' ones are squat toilets).

They have music/running water sounds for 'privacy', plus the toilet seats are all electronically heated, and they have separate wash buttons men and women (the water angles towards different areas), plus some even have built-in dryers as well .

Haha I've heard about that but wasn't sure how common that really was. We are planning a trip there next year and I was wondering if what I've heard about the toilets were true and now I'm SO curious to check it out for myself hahah