Bereaved partner visa, power of attorney, guardianship of kids, etc.

This is a hypothetical question, but it's one my wife and I have pondered for a while. Because my status as a non-citizen will be so precarious, we are trying to prepare for worst case scenarios.

If she were to die (I can hardly bear to think of the possibility) while our kids were still minors (her biological, my step)...I know that I would apply for ILR as a bereaved partner.

But how would we sort out guardianship for the kids? Would it be exactly the same as if I were a UK citizen, or are there special immigration considerations? What if my wife were alive but incapacitated? Does being a non-citizen affect my ability to have power of attorney or medical surrogacy (ability to make medical decisions on her behalf)?

Although we of course hope we'll both be alive and healthy for decades to come, in some ways it would be easier if something happened to me. If I had to assume full custody of two kids in a foreign country with very little understanding of the culture and all the nitty gritty of paperwork/bureaucracy, I'd need a lot of help. I know there's not too much you can do to prepare for "what if," but I'm trying to find out what I can.

Anyone have information?

Very curious as what would happen if you didn't have kids and your UK spouse died (again, hopefully that doesn't happen for a long long time!) would you have to leave because there's no children or anything that would technically keep you there??


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

No, if your partner dies you can apply for ILR right away.

https://www.gov.uk/visas-partner-dies

But how would we sort out guardianship for the kids? Would it be exactly the same as if I were a UK citizen, or are there special immigration considerations?

Is their father still alive? If he is, I assume he will be their legal guardian as their father. If he isn't alive then can you adopt them asap?

Is their father still alive? If he is, I assume he will be their legal guardian as their father. If he isn't alive then can you adopt them asap?

I've pondered this because my step daughters mother passed away. What would happen hypothetically if my husband died. Would I get custody? Or could her nan (biological on mothers side) fight for it...because she would if I ever tried to move away.

Again hoping this never happens, but we never expected to lose her mum either.


Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk

Is their father still alive? If he is, I assume he will be their legal guardian as their father. If he isn't alive then can you adopt them asap?

Their dad is alive, but we never know what could happen. If he was still alive, of course he would have custody but I would share responsibility. But my fear is that something might happen to both of their parents and what I would need to do.

I've pondered this because my step daughters mother passed away. What would happen hypothetically if my husband died. Would I get custody? Or could her nan (biological on mothers side) fight for it...because she would if I ever tried to move away.

Again hoping this never happens, but we never expected to lose her mum either.


Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk

I think, although I'm not sure, it would have to be specified in the will. We are trying to set ours up and are talking about options.

Their dad is alive, but we never know what could happen. If he was still alive, of course he would have custody but I would share responsibility. But my fear is that something might happen to both of their parents and what I would need to do.

 I think you will find that legally, it is their father who has the responsibility. Any responsibility for a stepfather, would need the parents agreement.


As the parents aren't together, the odds of them both dying at the same time, seems remote.

You might need to talk to a solicitor about this.

I've pondered this because my step daughters mother passed away. What would happen hypothetically if my husband died. Would I get custody? Or could her nan (biological on mothers side) fight for it...because she would if I ever tried to move away.

Grandparents do have rights with their grandchildren and you are only a stepmother, unless you adopt her. A solicotor will be able to advise.

Again hoping this never happens, but we never expected to lose her mum either.

That's why people prepare, just in case: take out insurance, sort out where children (and pets )will go, write a will etc.

This is a really good (if morbid) question, AV, and has set me to thinking as well...

I actually have legal custody of our (my and my DH's) two children, because when they were born, DH was going through a hellish custody battle and divorce with HIS ex and I wasn't sure whether DH and I were going to survive that battle (it took almost 4 years, all told). So I went to court in the US (he didn't contest or anything) so that I could get custody and also get court sanctioned child support. However, now that we are married, and living in another country, does my custody still hold up? I guess I should check...if something were to happen to me now, I don't want his custody rights to be questioned.

Sorry to hijack, AV...but you got me thinking!

This is a really good (if morbid) question, AV, and has set me to thinking as well...

I actually have legal custody of our (my and my DH's) two children, because when they were born, DH was going through a hellish custody battle and divorce with HIS ex and I wasn't sure whether DH and I were going to survive that battle (it took almost 4 years, all told). So I went to court in the US (he didn't contest or anything) so that I could get custody and also get court sanctioned child support. However, now that we are married, and living in another country, does my custody still hold up? I guess I should check...if something were to happen to me now, I don't want his custody rights to be questioned.

Sorry to hijack, AV...but you got me thinking!

Not hijacking. I think it's good for everyone to consider. I HOPE this never becomes a real thing, but I keep seeing myself as a new widow, grief-stricken without even the kids' dad to help, and completely clueless as to how to care for the kids. I mean, yes of course I'll be their stepmom and live with them and everything, but no one can replace Mum and Dad.

I guess it's more on my mind than most as my own dad died last year.