high risk pregnancy in the UK

She did not say she was going to have a child while she was poverty stricken.  Besides which.... even if she was desitute does being poor mean that you can't have children? 

No, but as one has the option to wait a bit until she's a little more established/closer to family/kids are older, etc. it seems the responsible thing to do for the entire family.  As a parent, I can't imagine conceiving a child whom I KNOW is going to be born so prematurely that his/her health will be very seriously compromised and is at increased risk for lifelong disabilities, especially when I already had two other children.  Their lives would be impacted as well.  It's heart-breaking enough for me when my daughter falls ill through unavoidable circumstances, so I wouldn't want to have one knowing he/she would experience so much pain at the outset.  But that's just me; may not be the same for all. 

I do not see where  I told you not to offer an opinion or to take it to Pettifog.  Feel free to  opine away... I just differ in mine and simply thought that perhaps Elly-ah's post was being taken to a direction that was not her intention.   I just really do not like how someone being Rh sensitive is being called irresponsible for perhaps wanting another child. I also may be losing my senses from reading too much for my courses, but I do not see where she said she was going to be bad off financially either.    In the end I think it's up to Elly-ah to explain what she meant if she chooses to. I for one will put down my placard and leave the discussion to people who like these types of discussions.  

I for one will put down my placard and leave the discussion to people who like these types of discussions. 

Not sure what that's supposed to mean but whatever. 

She did say her financial circumstances were less than stellar, that her baby would most likely be 6 weeks premature and she would require hospitalization for blood transfusions.  Regardless of what it would do to her own health, I don't pretend to understand having another baby knowing that child would be premature and have all the health problems that can come with prematurity.  It's not a risk that I would take.  

Yes ok, we get the point, you've said it 3 or 4 times now, thank you! You would do something different if you were in what you understand to be her position. Great. Good for you. You've made your point now though, and by going on and on about it you're sounding pretty harsh and judgemental towards the poster. IMHO.

Guys!

Hey...I know why everyone is so tense here lately...you're all worried about me and my surgery Wed.

Don't worry!  I'll be fine!  I'm a little scared too, but that's no reason for us all to get so touchy with each other.

Big hugs.  I'm not leaving you for long, I promise!  I'll be back in a few days!

OK? 

 

Yes ok, we get the point, you've said it 3 or 4 times now, thank you! You would do something different if you were in what you understand to be her position. Great. Good for you. You've made your point now though, and by going on and on about it you're sounding pretty harsh and judgemental towards the poster. IMHO.

God forbid I clarify my point.   

  Besides which.... even if she was desitute does being poor mean that you can't have children? 

I am not commenting on the original poster specifically, but if someone is destitute or poor, having a child would probably not be a wise choice.  So being poor doesn't mean you can't have children, but it might mean you shouldn't.  Just my opinion...

OK OK all points have been clarified and alot of judgements have been made.  And we all know how easy it is to know what other people should do in any situation.  Now, could we all return to topic and keep pregancy and parenting a happy supportive place.  Pretty please. *


*this is your one asking nicely everybody. 

Hey...I know why everyone is so tense here lately...you're all worried about me and my surgery Wed.

Don't worry!  I'll be fine!  I'm a little scared too, but that's no reason for us all to get so touchy with each other.

LOL. Exactly. Don't worry, everybody, Saf is going to be just fine. In fact in less than a week she'll be back here with us and have a lovely little baby to tell us about!

Lol SAF!!! Hugs woman!

<i>I assume that when I get pregnant again, my kids will be much older and we'll be closer to family, but say the unexpected were to happen when i'm up here in Fife with financial circumstances less than stellar. </i>

After scanning the replies that have cropped up in the last couple days, I'm having a hard time understanding where I went wrong.  I am not currently planning on another child.  I *am* curious about a new healthcare system.  I am also curious what would happen to me if I were to get pregnant at a bad time.  I did not intend to start a war on gestational ethics.

Incidentally, I was being half-facetious with my doctor's comment about getting my tubes tied.  He has offered it to me as an option, and probably made a point of doing so because the US doesn't like to give tubals to young women unless there is a good reason.  The reason in my case is that it would be difficult and high risk, and if I was certain I didn't want any more children, it would be a reasonable choice for me.  That's really beside the point, however.  The risk  would be mine and my family's and the cost, in this country, would be to the taxpayer.  If that in itself is a problem, then I'll prepare an argument on the philosophies behind socialized healthcare, but I'd really rather not think that's the case.

Now that I have that off my chest...

Thank you to those who didn't hasten to jump on my words. 

Oi...

Whether people agree with or not, the existence of socialized healthcare removes a lot of the argument.  A person might resent me for getting pregnant again.  Another might resent a person for smoking.  Another might resent a person for not aborting a seriously disabled child.  But what really is the point, aside from exercising your right to make others feel guilt?  There is no reason for a values discussion ever, really.  It's not like the government is going to start picking and choosing who gets their healthcare paid for anytime soon.  Because of unforunate events in my first pregnancy, to balance the playing field of reproductive rights, I need costly procedures.  I fail to see how this is fundamentally different from the person who wants a heart transplant in order to exercise his right to live as long as possible.  This is one reason why I think progressive ideas like socialized healthcare are a good thing; people become defined less by their cost and more by their needs.  At least that's the idea.  Apparently there still exists a lot of 'american-style' sentiment that a society has more to do with who benefits society and who burdens it and less to do with a society with aggregate needs that need to be taken care of. 

Anyhoo..I'll try to avoid contentious phraseology in the future

Is it just me, or did several posts get moved/deleted? *confused*

yes the moralistic debate got shifted to a new thread

Off-topic replies have been deleted by Mindy, as was warned.