Hello
Guest

Sponsored Links


Topic: Dreading the drama  (Read 840 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

  • *
  • Posts: 261

  • Lover of Target and M&S
  • Liked: 43
  • Joined: Nov 2016
  • Location: Philly area to Bicester
Dreading the drama
« on: April 01, 2018, 10:48:53 PM »
My mom is a huge drama queen and loves to have “Health issues” whenever something happens to take any kind of attention away from her. My dad drops major guilt trips.
This is part of why we’re moving.
We’re literally having a hard time deciding when to tell my parents. My mom will say my husband forced me into this, or that I’ll die because of the NHS. This is a woman who told us that she had pancreatic cancer, but then it magically went away (probably when she realized that you don’t survive)
She also told me that I’m the cause of her stress induced COPD flairs.
Ugh.. thanks for reading!
Type of Application: Priority Settlement Spouse Visa
Online Application: 9 March, 2019  Philadelphia,US
Biometrics: 14 March 2019, Philadelphia
Application Mailed: 14 March 2019
Application Received in NY: 15 March 2019
Application Received in Sheffield: 19 March 2019
Decision email received: 16 April 2019
Passport received: 17 April 2019


  • *
  • Posts: 15954

  • Liked: 3807
  • Joined: Jun 2012
  • Location: Wokingham
Re: Dreading the drama
« Reply #1 on: April 02, 2018, 09:01:21 AM »
I'm so sorry.  That's the last thing you need.

How far away does your mom live?  Could you play along with her games?  Tell her you want to attend appointments with her.


  • *
  • Posts: 4175

  • Liked: 441
  • Joined: Sep 2015
Re: Dreading the drama
« Reply #2 on: April 02, 2018, 10:02:14 AM »
Do not blame you at all for wanting space!  Have you set up a plan for how to deal with communications with here after you are farther away?


  • *
  • Posts: 261

  • Lover of Target and M&S
  • Liked: 43
  • Joined: Nov 2016
  • Location: Philly area to Bicester
Re: Dreading the drama
« Reply #3 on: April 02, 2018, 02:53:50 PM »
I'm so sorry.  That's the last thing you need.

How far away does your mom live?  Could you play along with her games?  Tell her you want to attend appointments with her.
I live at 33, she lives at 63. Same street!
Type of Application: Priority Settlement Spouse Visa
Online Application: 9 March, 2019  Philadelphia,US
Biometrics: 14 March 2019, Philadelphia
Application Mailed: 14 March 2019
Application Received in NY: 15 March 2019
Application Received in Sheffield: 19 March 2019
Decision email received: 16 April 2019
Passport received: 17 April 2019


  • *
  • Posts: 15954

  • Liked: 3807
  • Joined: Jun 2012
  • Location: Wokingham
Re: Dreading the drama
« Reply #4 on: April 02, 2018, 03:15:04 PM »
I live at 33, she lives at 63. Same street!

No wonder you want to escape!   :o

Honestly, distance may help your relationship.


  • *
  • Posts: 261

  • Lover of Target and M&S
  • Liked: 43
  • Joined: Nov 2016
  • Location: Philly area to Bicester
Re: Dreading the drama
« Reply #5 on: April 02, 2018, 03:37:54 PM »
Do not blame you at all for wanting space!  Have you set up a plan for how to deal with communications with here after you are farther away?
I will call weekly and can Skype. She is the overbearing, cause a scene in public, helicopter mom that everyone dreads! She’s not above doing this stuff. I’m 46!!!!! 
Type of Application: Priority Settlement Spouse Visa
Online Application: 9 March, 2019  Philadelphia,US
Biometrics: 14 March 2019, Philadelphia
Application Mailed: 14 March 2019
Application Received in NY: 15 March 2019
Application Received in Sheffield: 19 March 2019
Decision email received: 16 April 2019
Passport received: 17 April 2019


  • *
  • *
  • *
  • Posts: 15118

  • Also known as PB&J ;-)
  • Liked: 455
  • Joined: Sep 2007
  • Location: :-D
Re: Dreading the drama
« Reply #6 on: April 03, 2018, 02:43:45 PM »
Errr........ well that sounds pretty drama filled....  and all a bit ridiculous.... 

I don't know. At the end of the day, we are our own people who need to live our own lives.  Your parents will survive. Countless other parents do okay when their kids live on the other side of the world.  There are for example, 14395 members on this site. And most of our parents cope okay  ;)
I've never gotten food on my underpants!
Work permit (2007) to British Citizen (2014)
You're stuck with me!


  • *
  • Posts: 6187

  • Liked: 1012
  • Joined: Oct 2012
  • Location: Berkshire
Re: Dreading the drama
« Reply #7 on: April 24, 2018, 05:43:15 PM »
Bullshitting cancer....? I mean, I definitely don't blame you for wanting to make this move and to get this independence!
My, how time flies....

* Married in the US and applied for first spousal visa August 2013
* Moved to the UK on said visa October 2013
* FLR(M) applied for  May 2016. Biometrics requested June 2016. Approval given July 2016.
* ILR applied for January 2019 (using priority processing). Approved February 2019.
* Citizenship applied for May  2019

**CITIZENSHIP APPROVED July 4, 2019! Formal ceremony on August 28, 2019!**

HEY MOM, I'M A BRIT NOW :D


  • *
  • Posts: 261

  • Lover of Target and M&S
  • Liked: 43
  • Joined: Nov 2016
  • Location: Philly area to Bicester
Re: Dreading the drama
« Reply #8 on: April 24, 2018, 05:59:11 PM »
Bullshitting cancer....? I mean, I definitely don't blame you for wanting to make this move and to get this independence!
Yep. This makes me so mad as I actually had agressive breast cancer. did chemo and all of the fun stuff that goes with it.
She still doesn't know! LOL
Type of Application: Priority Settlement Spouse Visa
Online Application: 9 March, 2019  Philadelphia,US
Biometrics: 14 March 2019, Philadelphia
Application Mailed: 14 March 2019
Application Received in NY: 15 March 2019
Application Received in Sheffield: 19 March 2019
Decision email received: 16 April 2019
Passport received: 17 April 2019


  • *
  • Posts: 6187

  • Liked: 1012
  • Joined: Oct 2012
  • Location: Berkshire
Re: Dreading the drama
« Reply #9 on: April 24, 2018, 06:06:59 PM »
Yep. This makes me so mad as I actually had agressive breast cancer. did chemo and all of the fun stuff that goes with it.
She still doesn't know! LOL

Oh man! While I am so incredibly happy that you've made it to the other side of the fight against cancer, I know I would be INFURIATED if I were in your position and had anybody, let alone my own mom, fake a cancer diagnosis. I am SO sorry that you've had to deal with that kind of stuff happening! I feel like you could find others who have similar stories on https://www.reddit.com/r/raisedbynarcissists/ that might help you at least know you aren't alone.
My, how time flies....

* Married in the US and applied for first spousal visa August 2013
* Moved to the UK on said visa October 2013
* FLR(M) applied for  May 2016. Biometrics requested June 2016. Approval given July 2016.
* ILR applied for January 2019 (using priority processing). Approved February 2019.
* Citizenship applied for May  2019

**CITIZENSHIP APPROVED July 4, 2019! Formal ceremony on August 28, 2019!**

HEY MOM, I'M A BRIT NOW :D


  • *
  • Posts: 261

  • Lover of Target and M&S
  • Liked: 43
  • Joined: Nov 2016
  • Location: Philly area to Bicester
Re: Dreading the drama
« Reply #10 on: April 24, 2018, 06:09:48 PM »
Oh man! While I am so incredibly happy that you've made it to the other side of the fight against cancer, I know I would be INFURIATED if I were in your position and had anybody, let alone my own mom, fake a cancer diagnosis. I am SO sorry that you've had to deal with that kind of stuff happening! I feel like you could find others who have similar stories on https://www.reddit.com/r/raisedbynarcissists/ that might help you at least know you aren't alone.
thanks. I'll have to check that site out. :)
Type of Application: Priority Settlement Spouse Visa
Online Application: 9 March, 2019  Philadelphia,US
Biometrics: 14 March 2019, Philadelphia
Application Mailed: 14 March 2019
Application Received in NY: 15 March 2019
Application Received in Sheffield: 19 March 2019
Decision email received: 16 April 2019
Passport received: 17 April 2019


Sponsored Links





 

coloured_drab