Nope, no one is sticking to the rules. So I will.
Scotland is no good. You don't want to come to Scotland, nope, nope, nope. Midgees, no sun in the winter, cold-damp-rain, not being able to sleep in the summer because of the light levels, it takes forever to get anywhere on windy-single track roads, not having your packages delivered because you're 'not in the mainland UK', running out of food in the shops in the winter when the snow block the roads and the lorries can't make it north, and having the newsteams not care about you.