Sounds familiar

A settlement visa as they wanted to move to the UK. They are already legally married.

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Another stupid question - can't she just fly over for the wedding as a visitor and re-apply for the settlement visa afterwards?

Another stupid question - can't she just fly over for the wedding as a visitor and re-apply for the settlement visa afterwards?

Yes, she could have done this.  But now she has a rejection as a spouse so it looks iffy.  To ensure she could get in she should now apply for a vistor's visa in advance.

Yes, she could have done this.  But now she has a rejection as a spouse so it looks iffy.  To ensure she could get in she should now apply for a vistor's visa in advance.

I see I see.

Sounds like bad planning from their side tbh

One thing that remains unanswered about this is the spouse visa rejection.

She didn't ever mention in the non-priority thread that she had received anything.

Yet the border officer told her it was refused in May, and that seems to line up timeline-wise as she applied non-priority at the end of February.

So, how is it the case that, two months on, she had not been notified?

Personally, a world where a couple who love each other have to scale such bureaucratic obstacles just to be together and enjoy their special day together, to me, is a sign of a world that's gone very wrong somewhere along the line.  I can't help but sympathise.

I do agree that it does feel horrible that people have to jump through obstacles to just be together. I totally sympathise with that. But this wasn't *THE* special day. It was a party and they were married in the US prior. I sort of also feel like it wouldn't have made a difference if it was the special day thought because - although it totally sucks and I have all the empathy in the world of how crap it is - it does come down to making poor choices. They could have easily just had her visit for the party and go home to apply for the visa OR apply for the visa, get it approved, THEN plan the party. There was really no need to plan the party when they knew it would fall closely enough to when they'd be waiting to hear back on their visa. That is just common sense and I would expect people with their level of educations to know that. The obstacles are crap, but we have to do as much due diligence to make them as easier as we can, but that's just my opinion.

I do agree that it does feel horrible that people have to jump through obstacles to just be together. I totally sympathise with that. But this wasn't *THE* special day. It was a party and they were married in the US prior. I sort of also feel like it wouldn't have made a difference if it was the special day thought because - although it totally sucks and I have all the empathy in the world of how crap it is - it does come down to making poor choices. They could have easily just had her visit for the party and go home to apply for the visa OR apply for the visa, get it approved, THEN plan the party. There was really no need to plan the party when they knew it would fall closely enough to when they'd be waiting to hear back on their visa. That is just common sense and I would expect people with their level of educations to know that. The obstacles are crap, but we have to do as much due diligence to make them as easier as we can, but that's just my opinion.

I agree with you that the whole thing was poorly planned.

Personally, I would never have tried to do anything like she did.  It was just foolish.

But I still think the ultimate intention was perfectly understandable, so I sympathise.

Also, it seems like she wasn't notified that her visa was rejected, which, if that is the case, isn't very fair either.  Those two months could have been used to apply for a visit visa to the UK.

Just reading through all the comments.  It’s always heart wrenching to hear people go through any kind of refusal as we know we are going through the same thing.  Getting refused to be with our loved ones is devastating. 

However,  no one is above the rules.  All of us no matter what our situation is subjected to it. 

I feel for them, but they really should have planned it better. 

I have been away from my husband for years because we couldn’t satisfy certain requirements.  Now that we have almost all the boxes ticked we are going for it.  We have a 5 year old daughter who is suffering because she’s without her dad.  I am suffering as essentially I am a single mom.  Saying all that, it doesn’t make our situation any more important than anyone elses.

I agree with you that the whole thing was poorly planned.

Personally, I would never have tried to do anything like she did.  It was just foolish.

But I still think the ultimate intention was perfectly understandable, so I sympathise.

Also, it seems like she wasn't notified that her visa was rejected, which, if that is the case, isn't very fair either.  Those two months could have been used to apply for a visit visa to the UK.

I do agree that if they truly weren't notified, that's unfortunate and I do sympathise with anybody needing to jump through these hurdles to be with the person they love. I do think though that even if they weren't notified, that party shouldn't have been planned. They should have waited to make all those arrangements until they'd heard news because, unfortunately, an approval is never guaranteed.

I think the reason it bothered me was more that it didn't come across like they were taking any responsibility for their poor planning so that is where it becomes hard for me to show my sympathy. And when I realised it was somebody who posted here who was told this was too risky and they did it anyways and were shocked, that just made it even harder.

I'm sure I sound like a total jerk with no empathy, but I promise you that's not the case. I just feel like adults need to take ownership of their responsibilities and I just didn't feel that was happening here.

Absolutely.

Are they reading this thread? Now they aret talking about how this is US citizen complaining and they make it hard for Brits to their county: fingerprints and eye scans just for a two week holiday and can't just turn up at the US border.

With the exception of understanding the visa requirements (as they must not have qualified or demonstrated they qualified to be refused) and not booking anything until the visa was in hand, they didn’t really do anything wrong.

If their application was correct, they should have been perfectly fine to apply in March with an August date for a blessing.  Even though they didn’t pay for priority, they were processed within 12 weeks which was still plenty of time.

I am surprised they took such risks when it’s likely the husband has been through the US process.  I think most of us would take the immigration process for any country with a big dose of pessimism.

I would say the lessons learned are:

1.  Book nothing until visas are in hand
2.  Don’t have loved ones book anything until visas are in hand
3.  Buy wedding insurance
4.  Don’t attempt to enter the UK on a second passport
5.  Take your time with the visa application.  Just because you are a smart, contributing member of society is not a guarantee you will get your visa.  At the end of the day, it’s a tick box exercise.  Tick those boxes everyone!

And honestly - I’m surprised she wasn’t allowed in.

I do agree that if they truly weren't notified, that's unfortunate and I do sympathise with anybody needing to jump through these hurdles to be with the person they love. I do think though that even if they weren't notified, that party shouldn't have been planned. They should have waited to make all those arrangements until they'd heard news because, unfortunately, an approval is never guaranteed.

I think the reason it bothered me was more that it didn't come across like they were taking any responsibility for their poor planning so that is where it becomes hard for me to show my sympathy. And when I realised it was somebody who posted here who was told this was too risky and they did it anyways and were shocked, that just made it even harder.

I'm sure I sound like a total jerk with no empathy, but I promise you that's not the case. I just feel like adults need to take ownership of their responsibilities and I just didn't feel that was happening here.

I'm with you.

My sympathies are with the people who have done all the pre work they need to but somehow still blocked by obstacles outside of their control.

Planning a wedding without a valid visa on hand and betting on getting the spouse visa for sure is the risk they were willing to take and now when the risk occurred they went to the media to whine - it's not responsible adult behaviour to me.

Also, she showed up at the boarder control without a visa but just emails and hoped to get through? REALLY??  that naivety upsets me.

I do agree that if they truly weren't notified, that's unfortunate and I do sympathise with anybody needing to jump through these hurdles to be with the person they love. I do think though that even if they weren't notified, that party shouldn't have been planned. They should have waited to make all those arrangements until they'd heard news because, unfortunately, an approval is never guaranteed.

I think the reason it bothered me was more that it didn't come across like they were taking any responsibility for their poor planning so that is where it becomes hard for me to show my sympathy. And when I realised it was somebody who posted here who was told this was too risky and they did it anyways and were shocked, that just made it even harder.

I'm sure I sound like a total jerk with no empathy, but I promise you that's not the case. I just feel like adults need to take ownership of their responsibilities and I just didn't feel that was happening here.

Not to me, you don't.

At the end of the day, you're offering correct advice. 

I'm with you.

My sympathies are with the people who have done all the pre work they need to but somehow still blocked by obstacles outside of their control.

Planning a wedding without a valid visa on hand and betting on getting the spouse visa for sure is the risk they were willing to take and now when the risk occurred they went to the media to whine - it's not responsible adult behaviour to me.

Also, she showed up at the boarder control without a visa but just emails and hoped to get through? REALLY??  that nativity upsets me.

For me, the fact that it's not even a wedding, it's just a secondary party that isn't reeeaaallllyyy necessary to have sooner rather than later is what makes it seem even more ridiculous. I'm not saying don't have the party, but I don't understand what the rush was??

And honestly - I’m surprised she wasn’t allowed in.

Really?  I wasn't. If you read the border officers posts, they say that they turn more US citizens away from their Ports than any other citizens. Arriving with her dogs, taken exams to work in the UK,  getting another US passport(?) to enter the UK, husband in the UK,  any  strong ties to the US? 

If everybody was honest then this wouldn't be a problem,  but as we see from posts on here and  other forums, too many are dishonest and will lie to enter the UK.