My employment seeking journey filled with disrespectful UK employers

I've lost count of how many applications I've filled out since coming to the UK.  I stopped keeping track somewhere around 200.  But the disrespect I've received from some managers/supervisors remains clear.  Here's a bit about me.

I've 30 years experience in the Office & Retail markets. I've been a secretary, a receptionist, & a PA.  I've run the gamut of retail from shelf stocker to sales audit.  I've been a supervisor, a manager, & HR.  I've owned & operated 2 businesses.  And I moved to the UK knowing that I would be starting over & I had no qualms with it.  I didn't know how much negativity I would be facing & was not prepared for it. 

At first I thought it was my CV.  Is it too wordy or not translating well (US words versus UK words)?  Am I missing out keywords?  So I contacted the "CV" people.  Only one replied back saying he could "fix" it for a low cost of £80.  That's great!  Except his reply to me had 3 spelling mistakes in the first 2 sentences.  So I declined his offer.

I tried to apply with the local job centre.  They informed me they only help UK residents.  When I said I was a resident with an NI number & allowed to seek work per the HO, they said I hadn't been Born in the UK so they were under no obligation.  I signed up with a temp service next.  They didn't want to take me because "You're going to struggle understanding the accents since you're not from here."  Ummm---Hello?!  You've got born & bred UK citizens who can't understand a Liverpool accent for goodness sakes.  In 2.5 yrs they've sent me 2 job openings.

I'm registered on 3 online job finder sites.  They're great about sending me "Jobs that match your qualifications".  Except they don't.  Nowhere in my CV do the keywords "HGV driver" or "plumber" or "engineer" appear.  And for some reason they all seem to think that "this area only" translates to any job within a 300 mile radius.

I applied to be a McDonalds greeter.  Their rejection email was priceless.  "I live too far away from the franchise location".  They consider precisely 1 single mile as "too far",  In the "how did we do" survey they attached I replied with the question "Do the employees at this location actually live in the Asda carpark since you think 1 mile is too far a distance to travel."

I applied at a local shoe shop.  I used to own a shoe shop.  Baby feet to Adults, I know it. This should've been a dead cert; the manager thought I was perfect.  Nope.  Her supervisor who stayed at head office wasn't going to "Take her word on hiring anyone."  I thought sexist, egotistical, lying, hypocritical, bigots was just an American thing but I was mistaken.  This man was all that plus.  He said I was lazy for not already having a job,  I was a liar because no one applies for "X" amount of jobs.  And the cherry on top of his crap sundae was "You're probably a thief too.  You'd steal the day's takings given half a chance."

(Updating with a clarification)  The below are some statements I've heard from interviewers.  The responses are my thoughts to the statements.  I did not speak these thoughts aloud. 

"You're overqualified".  Yeah so what?  That's my problem. 
"You're underqualified"  And?  One can't get a job without experience yet one can't get experience without a job.
"Where are you from?"  Umm Hello....You're not supposed to ask that, it's racist.
"Ohhhh you're (*whisper) One of those."  WTH?!
"You don't want to work here"  Why not?  You do.
"It's only "X" days a week"  So?  "X" days is better than nothing.

All I want is a job. 

So sorry you’ve been having so much trouble finding a job .

Usually the biggest hurdle people here on the forum have to overcome is the lack of UK work experience and having no UK references.

Have you tried doing some unpaid volunteering?

That’s one of the things we usually recommend doing as soon as you can after arriving in the UK, because it gives you some UK work experience to put on your CV and also can help with UK references. Once you have something like that on your CV, you may find that employers are more inclined to consider you.


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My friends keep pushing me to become a freelance consultant. I don't think they understand the amount of anxiety that causes me, for so many reasons. Not the least of which is the British attidude towards foreigners, and *gasp*, a disabled one that they might need to make adjustments for. I'm sorry to hear you are also struggling. You've owned businesses before, are there any you could see running over here? Are there any meetups for things you find interesting where you could get to know others in the area? Word of mouth/personal referral seems to be the only way to get a job with any company that isn't completely skeezy.

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I think most employers work on a whitling the pile down basis.  It allows bigotry/sexism to exist while still being deniable. Uncontious too.

I think that if you answer the "Where are you from?" question with "You aren't supposed to ask that, it's racist!", then it's not surprising that you are having trouble finding a job.  Even if you give that reply in the most polite and professional manner, or even just think it, you are going to have a long search. 

I know it's a rant and here is a safe rant space, but if even one tiny percentage of that anger and negativity makes it out in an interview, it's over.  From your description of the shoe shop experience, it sounds like some of it might be.   Most unsuccessful interviews end with some polite lies like "you live too far away" not an argument between the two parties. 

I assumed that given the difficulty in the search, some extra frustration and illustrations of the events that wouldn't be present during the interviews were added here. And guess what? If you'd been met with this much resistance for a year you'd be damn frustrated too.

Volunteer opportunities can be hard to find, but they are definitely going to be needed to show you're not just twiddling your thumbs right now. I think that suggestion is a solid one, so you may temporarily want to focus your search on those while trying to make sure you're meeting people and making connections for more meaningful paying work.

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Ksand24 I've tried for volunteer work & been turned down.  Do you know how hard it is to be told you're not smart enough to know how to set an exam paper down on a desk?  It does do takes a special kind of skill to know that them there black squiggle bits is ain't to be a-showin' to the stewdints right off.  Being a furner I is too thick to knows papers done do get set upsides down in this here country.  Yes that was the message behind the refusal for that unpaid job---I didn't/wouldn't understand the procedure & there wouldn't be any supervisors available to explain the process to me.

Or that I'm not qualified to volunteer at a dementia care home?  For almost 5 yrs I was the sole carer for my father who had alzheimers & sundowner's dementia.

Or that I'd upset the hospital patients by volunteering because they wouldn't be able to understand me?  For goodness sake I speak English not Klingon.

I'm too ashamed to tell me partner how many rejections I've gotten.  Having to say I'm not good enough to even be a volunteer …..I just can't do it. 

In fairness, proctoring official exams is a bit more than just putting the exam paper face down on a desk.  In fact, I was not aware that it was an unpaid/volunteer position.  Exams are serious business.

Ksand24 I've tried for volunteer work & been turned down.  Do you know how hard it is to be told you're not smart enough to know how to set an exam paper down on a desk?  It does do takes a special kind of skill to know that them there black squiggle bits is ain't to be a-showin' to the stewdints right off.  Being a furner I is too thick to knows papers done do get set upsides down in this here country.  Yes that was the message behind the refusal for that unpaid job---I didn't/wouldn't understand the procedure & there wouldn't be any supervisors available to explain the process to me.

Or that I'm not qualified to volunteer at a dementia care home?  For almost 5 yrs I was the sole carer for my father who had alzheimers & sundowner's dementia.

Or that I'd upset the hospital patients by volunteering because they wouldn't be able to understand me?  For goodness sake I speak English not Klingon.

I'm too ashamed to tell me partner how many rejections I've gotten.  Having to say I'm not good enough to even be a volunteer …..I just can't do it.

There are required qualifications for care home workers, even voluntary. Could you find out what those are and acquire them? There are more layers of bureaucracy here than I ever imagined, but the only way up is to assimilate and do what they require, even if it makes no sense. If there's a guide dogs charity near you, I can recommend them. They are well organised and have specific volunteer positions

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Ksand24 I've tried for volunteer work & been turned down.  Do you know how hard it is to be told you're not smart enough to know how to set an exam paper down on a desk?  It does do takes a special kind of skill to know that them there black squiggle bits is ain't to be a-showin' to the stewdints right off.  Being a furner I is too thick to knows papers done do get set upsides down in this here country.  Yes that was the message behind the refusal for that unpaid job---I didn't/wouldn't understand the procedure & there wouldn't be any supervisors available to explain the process to me.

Or that I'm not qualified to volunteer at a dementia care home?  For almost 5 yrs I was the sole carer for my father who had alzheimers & sundowner's dementia.

Or that I'd upset the hospital patients by volunteering because they wouldn't be able to understand me?  For goodness sake I speak English not Klingon.

I'm too ashamed to tell me partner how many rejections I've gotten.  Having to say I'm not good enough to even be a volunteer …..I just can't do it.

Sorry to hear that . Those are more like jobs that you may need to show qualifications/experience for though.

I was thinking more along the lines of volunteering for:
- a local charity shop
- a church
- a charity bake sale
- a local sports event
- a fundraiser (like Comic Relief, who say they welcome diversity)
(I.e. Something that they basically can’t turn you down for).


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To be fair, care homes and similar have strict procedures to protect their vulnerable residents, I can understand this.

I was going to suggest an animal charity. At least the clients there won't judge you. Best of luck, I can't imagine the frustration you must be feeling.

From your description of the shoe shop experience, it sounds like some of it might be.   Most unsuccessful interviews end with some polite lies like "you live too far away" not an argument between the two parties.

Jimbocz,  I wasn't the one with the anger or negativity issues.  The man said I was Lazy Lying Thief.  What would your response to being called that have been?  Mine was to leave without stooping to his level of nastiness.

And most unsuccessful interviews end with the lies "We'll be in touch." or "We've a lot of other candidates to interview" or "Nice to have met you."

But thank you for your response.

JFKimberly,  This truly was a volunteer position.  And it did only involve setting papers down on each desk.  The description for the job said nothing about needing qualifications.  You wouldn't be in contact or interact with any pupils at any time according to them.  It was just taking a stack of papers & putting one upside down on every desk.  That's all.

Society here is very "judgy", even if it's not legal for them to be in the hiring process they still are. It could be worth consulting with a professional agency to get some tips and adjust your CV accordingly. It's a harder life up north, I genuinely hope you can talk with your other half about the struggles you're having. My husband is not much help but he is at least fully aware of every rejection I receive. Not feeling like I need to hide it helps since I'll soon be completely dependent on him financially. All you can do is keep trying, eventually it will happen and this will all be a thing of the past!

(But I do feel like experiences like yours are becoming more common. You can see it in job postings they are clearly discriminating against people legally in the country on family visas and it's perfectly fine for them to do that.)

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Society here is very "judgy", even if it's not legal for them to be in the hiring process they still are. It could be worth consulting with a professional agency to get some tips and adjust your CV accordingly. It's a harder life up north, I genuinely hope you can talk with your other half about the struggles you're having. My husband is not much help but he is at least fully aware of every rejection I receive. Not feeling like I need to hide it helps since I'll soon be completely dependent on him financially. All you can do is keep trying, eventually it will happen and this will all be a thing of the past!

(But I do feel like experiences like yours are becoming more common. You can see it in job postings they are clearly discriminating against people legally in the country on family visas and it's perfectly fine for them to do that.)

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It is a case of "what can you do?"

I do feel strongly that "UK experience" is bigotry plain and simple. An office in Putney is the same as one in Milwaukee. Same computer. Same spreadsheet. Almost everything is now rationalised across the world.