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Topic: Nightmares about bad things happening to your children  (Read 1557 times)

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Nightmares about bad things happening to your children
« on: January 10, 2005, 02:12:21 PM »
Do other parents have these? I keep having bad dreams about Ethan getting lost somewhere or hurting himself.  I had a really horrible dream on Saturday night and the next day we nearly had a nasty accident with the pram whilst getting off a train.


Re: Nightmares about bad things happening to your children
« Reply #1 on: January 10, 2005, 02:16:57 PM »
Welcome to my world!  Yep, I STILL have them!  They're almost all about her getting lost or separated from me s/how.  I think they're a subconscious manifestation of the normal anxiety a mother feels to protect her child.


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Re: Nightmares about bad things happening to your children
« Reply #2 on: January 10, 2005, 02:19:36 PM »
I@m not a parent, but i have these dreams and visions (while i'm awake) all the time about my husband.

I fear when i have children as they will be that much worse.

Someone once told me, you're ready to have children when you're ready for your heart to live outside your body (did someone here write that?)  I always think about that when my imagination gets the worst of me.  


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Re: Nightmares about bad things happening to your children
« Reply #3 on: January 10, 2005, 02:36:34 PM »
I feel a bit better knowing other people have these kind of dreams, thanks.


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Re: Nightmares about bad things happening to your children
« Reply #4 on: January 10, 2005, 02:45:40 PM »
I have them occasionally, but not all the time (thank goodness).  I remember right after eldest dd was born, I dreamt I took her to my office to show my coworkers.  Everyone of them took her from me and then promptly DROPPED her!  It was a horrible dream!  Can't figure out why I didn't just leave after the first one, but noooo, I had to show her to EVERYONE in the office!  >:(
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Re: Nightmares about bad things happening to your children
« Reply #5 on: January 10, 2005, 02:59:41 PM »
I still get them as well, though not as often as when my first child was a baby. They've increased a bit lately after reading the horrifying accounts of some of the tsunami survivors.
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Re: Nightmares about bad things happening to your children
« Reply #6 on: January 10, 2005, 03:01:23 PM »
oh don't remind me, there was a horrible story on the lunchtime news, this poor Swedish woman who had just got married lost her husband and child ... her son was actually pulled from her arms by the currents.


Re: Nightmares about bad things happening to your children
« Reply #7 on: January 10, 2005, 03:24:04 PM »
oh don't remind me, there was a horrible story on the lunchtime news, this poor Swedish woman who had just got married lost her husband and child ... her son was actually pulled from her arms by the currents.

Unfortunately, this happened to many mothers.  And I, too, have dreamed of it happening to me, except by wind.  I've also dreamt her pram got away from me and I could hear her little wail.  Now, she cries when she sees me leaving and it's really painful. 


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Re: Nightmares about bad things happening to your children
« Reply #8 on: January 10, 2005, 03:25:06 PM »
waaaaaaaah!! i'm never going to let Ethan go to school or leave the house ever again!!!


Re: Nightmares about bad things happening to your children
« Reply #9 on: January 10, 2005, 03:31:05 PM »
waaaaaaaah!! i'm never going to let Ethan go to school or leave the house ever again!!!

I quiver when she even goes with her grandmother to playgroup.  And her grandmother loves her beyond anything - Aillidh's the wee girl she never had and is the spitting image of her own beloved mother, Rose.  It's hard no matter what. 


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Re: Nightmares about bad things happening to your children
« Reply #10 on: January 10, 2005, 03:35:49 PM »
I have had dreams and thoughts of bad things happening to my two sons.  It can be very worrying and the state of the world does not help.


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Re: Nightmares about bad things happening to your children
« Reply #11 on: January 10, 2005, 03:46:04 PM »
Obviously, it's pretty normal.  I've had these kind of dreams from time to time, too.  I think it perhaps is some kind of instinctive/protective thing in your subconscious?

I usually had nightmares about the kids when I was about to embark on something.  For instance, before I made a trip to the US, I had a nightmare that the plane crashed into the ocean, and I was frantically trying to save my son and get out of the plane.

More recently, since being back in Chicago, I brushed up my resume and sent it out in response to a couple of ads.  Then, I had nightmares that, while I was at work, there was an emergency at the day care centre and I couldn't "get" to it to help my boys.  i.e. driving around in a panic, getting lost, stuck in traffic, etc. 

These dreams can be unnerving when you first wake, but I think as mothers, we're just wired to protect our children.

Don't worry Liz, you're normal!   :P
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Re: Nightmares about bad things happening to your children
« Reply #12 on: January 10, 2005, 04:53:24 PM »
I used to have this TERRIBLE dream!
I lived in Florida, where the summer just swelters.
I dreampt I had my son in his car seat in the back of the car and drove to work, completely forgetting to take him to day care first. I was inside work for a solid 8 hours, and came back to the car...to find him...oh gawd I can't even bear to think.

I also recall one time he lost sight of me in the grocery store. It was only for a sec, but I heard him cry...and that sound has haunted me to this day. I hear any other child cry that same way and I know it's a child having been separated and I start to cry myself.

Liz, having the panic dreams is very very common. They usually start during pregnancy. My son is now 16 and I still have them.
Married to Graham, we run our own open-source computer training company in beautiful Wiltshire out of our 1814 Georgian Regency home (a former lodging house and once featured in Antiques Roadshow)


Re: Nightmares about bad things happening to your children
« Reply #13 on: January 11, 2005, 11:53:48 AM »
I also recall one time he lost sight of me in the grocery store. It was only for a sec, but I heard him cry...and that sound has haunted me to this day. I hear any other child cry that same way and I know it's a child having been separated and I start to cry myself.

Once you become a mother, you can hear this cry with the hearing of a bat and it will clench your heart even if it's not from your own child. 

I have crap hearing, but I can hear my daughter's every whimper from her cot in the other room, even w/o a baby monitor. 

I think the thing no one can prepare you for when you have a baby is the extraordinary emotional commitment you feel to that child.  Forever.


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