So........ Nick says, "Watch this replay of Ronaldo's goal." I begrudgingly watch.
I say, "Is he Italian?"
Nick looks at me incredulously. "Italian? Why on earth would you think he is Italian?"
I said, "I dunno. He kind of looks Italian."
He said, "HE'S PORTUGUESE!!"
I said, "Well how they hell would I know?"
"Because you know it is Portugal against Czech Republic."
"So?"
"So he can't be Italian!"
"Why not? He plays for England, too."
"He does not!"
"He does. He plays for the team you root for!"
Nick is shaking his head, flabbergasted.
I said, "Well, does he not play for England?"
"NO! He USED to play for Manchester United!"
I said, "See! He did play for England!"
(I actually caught on to the difference about 1/2 way into the conversation, but I just like to screw with his head. That'll teach him to make me watch some replay.

)