How did the move effect you before and after?

But being a bit of an oldie myself...

Compared to me, you're a spring chicken!  I would love to be in my mid-30s again!

Compared to me, you're a spring chicken!

 

Thank you guys - I would be a mess without everyone on the boards.

I've been trying to think of it as one big roller coaster ride, some good, fun parts, some really really scary parts, but when you get off (at least with me) you're laughing and saying how much fun it was.

Not much longer now & you'll be my neighbor!!!

yeah - first thing steve said is that I need to learn how to get to your house via bus/walking. So, that will be my one of the first places I learn how to get to

Did you feel like something changed before you left?
Yes, I felt really anxious to leave. I could hardly concentrate on anything anymore.

Did you feel like you changed when you got there?
Yes, at first I was just relieved to be there and so excited about my new life. But my confidence levels dropped after a while when I realized how different everything was and how alone I felt. The longer I was there the more out of place I felt and for a while I was pretty depressed. Things are finally settling down for me now though... it does happen eventually, but not instantly.

Did your relationship (if you had one) w/ your brit SO change in the process of finalizing your plans for permancy and ending the long distance?
Not especially, maybe a little more stress? We were mostly excited.

How much did you relationship change once you arrived?
The longing for eachother brought on by the huge distance faded and we had to go from hardly ever seeing each other to seeing almost too much of each other very suddenly. Although we were both very honest with eachother throughout the whole LDR, we also had to REALLY learn everything about one another, the things that were no longer concealed by the great distance. It wasn't easy for me at first to go from one extreme to another, especially in a different country, but thankfully we happen to be a very compatible couple and are still happy together after all this time.

I've been trying to think of it as one big roller coaster ride, some good, fun parts, some really really scary parts, but when you get off (at least with me) you're laughing and saying how much fun it was.

Let's hope you don't throw up!

yeah - first thing steve said is that I need to learn how to get to your house via bus/walking. So, that will be my one of the first places I learn how to get to

Well if you're walking -- I can learn to meet you halfways & we'll both be that much further along!

Oh another thought on the change business...well two thoughts...one, change (no matter what decision you make) is inevitable -- situations change, people change, relationships change -- a lot depends on how you ride out & adapt to the changes.  As far as going from the LDR to living together -- IMO, there's a certain amount of heightened romance, drama, excitement, longing etc involved with the LDR part...I know when I was in the midst, it seemed constantly exciting (sometimes depressing) as far as when we were going to travel & meet up next etc etc...  'Coming down' to real life together was/is an adjustment for me (particularly after all the excitement of the wedding, the honeymoon & so on) -- you know, like getting disgusted with some of your partner's behaviors or bad habits now that you're around each other all the time...discovering new behaviors & bad habits that disgust or annoy you...one or the other being too clingy at any given time...and the focus shifts from the 'high romance' bit to settling down, paying the bills, washing the dirty laundry, getting a job...  It's definitely a change AND an adjustment to make!

high romance, what's that! lol.

man we had it GOOD when we were apart.  so much passion.

it seems the bills and everyday stuff gets in the way too much so we take a few steps back some days...some days it helps to literally think 'ok, i need to concentrate on HIM tonight and not the TV, dishes, check book etc.'

it is quite an adjustment.

Aimiloo -- you'll be off on your romantic Italian holiday soon!

I really didn't have anything to add to this specific thread but pitt I wanted you to know how excited I am for you!  You started posting on these boards right around the same time I did (although you've been much more diligent about it  ) and I cannot wait to hear your experiences with your last few days in the states, the move, your first impressions of living in England, how everything goes with the BF and uni . . . I wish you all the best and for the meantime I'll live vicariously through you!

Pittpanther, you and I are due to arrive around the same time, so I know what you're going through!

I leave my home town for the east coast where I am to spend a month in two weeks; then go directly to the UK. So I'm leaving in 2 weeks until Christmas.

I do feel weird- and I am doing things other posters have mentioned - going to local sites I never bothered with, etc. This week, I think I will buy a few rolls of film to get pictures of the streets, my house, etc.

Most of all, I just with I was already there. But, I also feel myself kind of missing Vegas already, especially my Dad. But, like another poster mentioned, I would hate to be stagnant. I have to live my own life. 

I feel like I've changed a lot in the past 4 months I've been in England, and not necessarily for the better.  I am enjoying being married and my (new) husband and I get along great.  We have lots of fun together, but I wasn't really worried about us because we had lived together through a student visa in England and through visitor visas in the US.  But since moving here permanently in March I feel I have become more shy and introverted.  The last time I was here (two years ago) I went out and made friends easily, had a job in the village shop I enjoyed, and just generally really enjoyed the experience.  But now that I am back I feel less happy.  Perhaps it's because the first time I knew it was short term and it was all a novelty, whereas now it is long term and the novelty factor is long gone.  My husband also received a new job two months ago, so we have moved from the northwest near his family down south to Wiltshire where neither of us know anyone.  Living in a thatched roof cottage in the country seemed wonderful til we moved in and I realized the only things that can keep me company during the day til I find a job are the cows and horses in the neighboring farmers field!

Cookie, hang in there. Four months, even though it may seem like a long time right now, is really not long enough to assimilate. At least it wasn't for me, and I've always been a huge anglophile and was DYING to move here.... But the reality of living here "for real" takes time to adjust to for a lot of us. It's taken me two years to really and truly find my feet - first figuring out just how life "works" and then to figure out how to fit myself into it.

But since moving here permanently in March I feel I have become more shy and introverted.

Don't worry - this seems to be a common phenomenon. It goes away, I promise.