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Topic: Hello from Gabi (and one knock on British customs)  (Read 1508 times)

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Hello from Gabi (and one knock on British customs)
« on: December 04, 2003, 11:23:25 PM »
Hello all,

My name is Gabi and I have been in the UK for a month. I love London - but I would like to be in contact with Americans.

I moved here because my wife wanted to study. And because she wants to be near her family. I haven't found work yet, while she has started working part-time. Her study program starts in Jan. We're house-sitting for my in-laws, who spend the winter in the Caribbean, so it's quite nice. No rent pressure yet.

BTW, I've been to a pub here already and I find this "buying rounds" custom a bit annoying - a commitment to total strangers. Anyone agree?

« Last Edit: December 04, 2003, 11:32:36 PM by GabiP »


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Re: Hello from Gabi (and one knock on British cust
« Reply #1 on: December 05, 2003, 12:12:08 AM »
Welcome Gabi!
Quote
Hello all,

BTW, I've been to a pub here already and I find this "buying rounds" custom a bit annoying - a commitment to total strangers. Anyone agree?


Don't get out much, so I don't even know what that means  ???
;D


Re: Hello from Gabi (and one knock on British cust
« Reply #2 on: December 05, 2003, 03:06:43 AM »
Hi Gabi..welcome to UKY. :)


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Re: Hello from Gabi (and one knock on British cust
« Reply #3 on: December 05, 2003, 04:20:48 AM »
Hi Gabi and welcome!  What is your wife going to study?  Sounds like a good chance for her -though I'd rather be in the Caribbean.  ;D

So where do you hail from orginially?  Enough of the questions.  

I do agree that the whole rounds thing is a bit hard to get used to especially if you aren't going to stay or drink as much as every one else.  It does all come out in the end though.  If you go out with the same group for a while.  

Missy it just that in the UK the custom at pubs is for each person to buy the group a round of drinks.  So if you go out with 5 friends or co workers everyone gets a round versus you buying your own drink.
The wiring in our brain is not static, not irrevocably fixed.  Our brains are adaptable. -Mattieu Ricard

Being ignorant is not so much a shame as being unwilling to learn. -Benjamin Franklin

I have long since come to believe that people never mean half of what they say, and that it is best to disregard their talk and judge only their actions. -D.Day


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Re: Hello from Gabi (and one knock on British cust
« Reply #4 on: December 05, 2003, 09:39:24 AM »
Quote

Missy it just that in the UK the custom at pubs is for each person to buy the group a round of drinks.  So if you go out with 5 friends or co workers everyone gets a round versus you buying your own drink.

[smiley=doh.gif]That shows how much I go to the pubs! Wait! I will be going tonight with about 30 co workers, does that mean I'M GONNA BE BROKE!!   [smiley=wreck.gif]


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Re: Hello from Gabi (and one knock on British cust
« Reply #5 on: December 05, 2003, 01:28:12 PM »
Well, mine is a bit of an international story - I was born in Venezuela but I moved to Washington D.C. when I was 4. I lived in Washington until age 25. Since then, I have lived in Tel Aviv, Israel, where I met my wife, and now in the UK.

My wife is going to get start an advanced degree in Counselling Psychotheraphy and eventually earn a doctorate in the field.

I am taking advantage of my free time (haven't found work) to work on a novel I've written. Soon, real life will start, I will get a job and meet people not only through my partner.


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Re: Hello from Gabi (and one knock on British cust
« Reply #6 on: December 05, 2003, 01:29:59 PM »
Hiya, Gabi, and welcome!

Missy, if you're going out with 30 co-workers, it is v. unlikely that you will be expected to "stand a round" of 30 drinks (and not even the hardest of drinkers could get through thirty drinks in a sitting!)  You will probably find that the group will resolve itself into several groups of 4 to 5 people, each of whom will buy a round for their group.  Or you may find that someone will call out "let's have a kitty!"  In this case everyone puts an agreed sum, say a fiver, into a pot (and it's often exactly that - a beer mug from behind the bar).  The kitty is then given to the bar staff, and whenever someone wants a drink, they just go up to the bar, order it, and the bar person removes the appropriate amount from the kitty and puts it into the pub till.  If you're staying for a long session, the kitty may be refreshed from time to time by an additional "whip-round", i.e., another collection.  If at the end of the session there is any money left in the kitty, it's often used to buy the bar person a drink, or put into one of the charity boxes on the bar.

It's quite okay, if you don't intend to stay long, to announce "it's okay, I'll look after myself" when someone offers to buy you a drink - in which case you're sort of establishing a round of one for yourself.

If you're going to the pub with co-workers and your boss, you may well find that the boss buys the first round for everyone, as a way of saying thanks to his/her staff.  This does not confer an automatic obligation to buy him/her one back.  If someone is having a birthday, they may well buy a drink for everyone in the same way.  It's a bit like being the host of the party.  Or, it may well be, if the birthday celebrant is young/junior/new to the workplace, that everyone else will offer to buy him/her a drink. If the group is large, obviously he/she will not want to accept every offer, and will decline with some such words as "thanks, but I'm okay for the moment!"

Like so many other things in Britain (including the constitution), pub etiquette is largely established by convention, custom and practice, and is unwritten.  It could be that what I've described above doesn't apply in your case!  Why not explain to your group that you're not au fait with Brit pub customs, and ask them to tell you their understanding of them.  This will probably take all evening!

And do tell us how it went!


Deo gratias Anglia redde pro victoria


Re: Hello from Gabi (and one knock on British cust
« Reply #7 on: December 05, 2003, 02:46:27 PM »


 Welcome Gabi,to a wonderful place :)


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Re: Hello from Gabi (and one knock on British cust
« Reply #8 on: December 05, 2003, 04:09:57 PM »
Cool Gabi...it's always good to have international people about.  I myself and most closely from the Norfolk area of Virginia.  So DC was my stomping ground of sorts.  Do you still speak Spanish?  Just curious.  My roomate in college was from Venezuela.

The wiring in our brain is not static, not irrevocably fixed.  Our brains are adaptable. -Mattieu Ricard

Being ignorant is not so much a shame as being unwilling to learn. -Benjamin Franklin

I have long since come to believe that people never mean half of what they say, and that it is best to disregard their talk and judge only their actions. -D.Day


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Re: Hello from Gabi (and one knock on British cust
« Reply #9 on: December 05, 2003, 04:30:02 PM »
Hiya Gabi - American here.   :)  Nice to meet you.  I think you'll find loads of Americans here.  Plus some great Brits that love to get together.  So hopefully you'll be old hat at all the customs very soon.
Give a man an inch and he thinks he's a ruler!


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Re: Hello from Gabi (and one knock on British cust
« Reply #10 on: December 22, 2003, 04:56:05 AM »
Hello, Gabi -- Welcome! Nice to know there's a writer on board. How far along is your novel? Are you going to put a pub scene in, now that the secrets have been revealed?  ;) (It's a big help, don't you think? That's what's so great about this site!) Looking forward to hearing more from you! Katelyn


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Re: Hello from Gabi (and one knock on British cust
« Reply #11 on: December 22, 2003, 08:39:26 PM »
Quote


And do tell us how it went!



Goodness Howard! (sorry gabi!) I just now read this post! As always, great information!  The party was great and drinks were on the boss! A great night out - drinks, meal, DJ and a cab!
Melissa ;D


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Re: Hello from Gabi (and one knock on British cust
« Reply #12 on: December 22, 2003, 09:25:10 PM »
That's triff, Melissa! So glad it went well!

And apologies to Gabi for that thread hijack of mine - it just seemed a good place to talk about pubs and rounds.
Deo gratias Anglia redde pro victoria


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Re: Hello from Gabi (and one knock on British cust
« Reply #13 on: December 29, 2003, 12:03:09 PM »
Hello Gabi,  welcome to UKY...  I too have been here just over a month now...  and finally starting to get past my homesickness...

I lived in the baltimore/DC area most of my life... mostly near annapolis...  

It is nice to welcome another neighbor here...  

Good luck with your novel...  we have a couple peeps in here that love to write, including myself...I have not started a book yet...but I hope to be shortly after I am more settled and have free time.

Shel
Logic is one thing, it keeps us in control!
But the heart only knows one, which is the  
depths of our soul!


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