An interesting article about gay couples moving to the UK

Don't know if anyone posted this article from the Guardian.  I thought it was interesting reading. 
If you follow the link there's also a human interest article describing two different couples. 
http://www.guardian.co.uk/gayrights/story/0,,1766934,00.html

A bit sensationalist...So same sex couples are so desperate they move to the UK. HOW???  Are the EU or UK partners?  Otherwise, they are just waiting for a work permit visa?

True that some states in the US do not offer the same rights to same sex couples, but that article made it seem as if they were being forcefully pushed out of the US, which I don't think is the case.  I know many same sex couples in MA and NY who are quite happy.

A bit sensationalist...So same sex couples are so desperate they move to the UK. HOW???  Are the EU or UK partners?  Otherwise, they are just waiting for a work permit visa?

True that some states in the US do not offer the same rights to same sex couples, but that article made it seem as if they were being forcefully pushed out of the US, which I don't think is the case.  I know many same sex couples in MA and NY who are quite happy.

It didn't seem sensational to me.  Are the people you know part of international couples?  Were they able to sponsor their foriegn partner?  That's what the article is about.  People are moving to the UK with their EU or UK citizen partner because it's easier to get a visa. 

Thank you for posting this Mindy

A bit sensationalist...So same sex couples are so desperate they move to the UK. HOW???  Are the EU or UK partners?  Otherwise, they are just waiting for a work permit visa?

True that some states in the US do not offer the same rights to same sex couples, but that article made it seem as if they were being forcefully pushed out of the US, which I don't think is the case.  I know many same sex couples in MA and NY who are quite happy.

I think the point being made is the UK has a visa for same sex couples whereas the US doesn't. 

The article isn't sensationalist from my perspective. That's exactly what has happened to my partner and I.

He is Canadian and British (though grew up in Canada). I'm American. He worked in the US for several years, during which time we met, built a life together, etc, hoping beyond hope that the tide would turn. After seven years together, eight years of him living in the US, his visa track was coming to an end and it became clear that through an arcane provision in immigration law he wasn't going to be able to get a green card.

So here we are, settling in London. We love it here, but we are a little bitter at the US gov't that we were forced into the decision. That said, we have a few really great friends here, so that's made the move unspeakably smoother and easier. We miss our life--our friends, careers, family, community--in the US, but if this is the worst thing life sends your way, then I suppose you're alright! 

By the way, I was granted a permanent entry/stay visa (eqivalent to a green card in the US) before I left the states because we could prove how long we'd been in a committed relationship. The US wouldn't even consider letting me sponsor my partner for a green card, as we're not "family." If we were straight, it would've been no problem.

Chs
-Baylor

thanks for sharing your story, baylor.  i'm sure you and your partner's story is far from a singular occurance. 

I can say this is exactly what has happened to me and my partner:

From the article:

When US citizens' foreign partners are not permitted to live with them in their country, Americans are forced to uproot themselves and leave their families, their jobs, their communities and country. Often, they turn to one of the 19 countries with laws that let citizens sponsor their same-sex partners for immigration purposes.

My partner got stopped a couple years ago, coming to visit me, and they claimed he was looking for work and they sent him packing back to the UK.  We tried for 3 years to come to some sort of arrangement, including looking for work, etc and they won't even give him a visitor visa now because "we think you will stay with Mr. Kelly and not leave."

He is very close to my family and so yes, we basically are going to have to sell our house in the US and live in exile in the UK.  Luckily we have the skills and resources to survive in another country.  We are hoping once we have a mortgage in the states that they will actually grant him a visitors visa so he can go back with me to see the family on holidays.

Being a Bi-National Gay Couple in the US STINKS.  Of course everyone has helpful advice like "oh, why don't you get married in Massachusettes or get a civil partnership in Vermont."  I am tired of explaining that our relationship isn't recognized on a federal level in any sense, and probablly won't be for quite a while to come.

I am totally happy and amazed with the UK civil partnership law.  I mean we can feel like a real couple and have right and benefit bestowed upon two people living together.  I not a huge "gay rights" fanatic who has to run around and impose my viewpoint on others, but people don't realize that all I am asking for is to live my life the way I want to and be left alone.  The problem is that is impossible in the US right now.

So I think in certain cases, that is spot on though I doubt the number of bi-national UK/US couples is a huge amount statistically, though it makes a huge difference to each of us on an individual basis.

I am totally happy and amazed with the UK civil partnership law.  I mean we can feel like a real couple and have right and benefit bestowed upon two people living together.  I not a huge "gay rights" fanatic who has to run around and impose my viewpoint on others, but people don't realize that all I am asking for is to live my life the way I want to and be left alone.  The problem is that is impossible in the US right now.

So I think in certain cases, that is spot on though I doubt the number of bi-national UK/US couples is a huge amount statistically, though it makes a huge difference to each of us on an individual basis.

It is good to hear that this is helping you and your partner kitsonk...I wish things were better in the US for couples such as you who are just trying to live and be happy with the person they love.

Being a Bi-National Gay Couple in the US STINKS. 

Ain't that the truth!

I am totally happy and amazed with the UK civil partnership law. I mean we can feel like a real couple and have right and benefit bestowed upon two people living together. I not a huge "gay rights" fanatic who has to run around and impose my viewpoint on others, but people don't realize that all I am asking for is to live my life the way I want to and be left alone. The problem is that is impossible in the US right now.

Very well said.  I could go on, but I don't want to turn this into a debate. 

Good on the UK, the US should take their cue.

Interesting article. It really puts things in to perspective when "real" people here share their stories. Thank you all for sharing! I wish the US was more open and understanding in these situations, but since they are not, I am glad people are able to find happiness together in the end. Maybe someday the US will follow the example and stay out of gay or straight people's bedrooms and let committed couples live together in peace 

Very well said.  I could go on, but I don't want to turn this into a debate. 

Good on the UK, the US should take their cue.

The good news it that this doesn't appear to be a debate.  At least in the UK.  The Civil Partnership law seems to have gone in with a few chuckles and some curiosity, but it has happened.  That is what is amazing is the "fear" that seems to be in the America that we are going to try and be "normal people" and that they might not be able to tell us from "normal" couples.  No one is getting voted out of office because of it, as shown yesterday.  It is become such a none issue.

The strange thing, my dad, who has been accepting of my lifestyle but has always though that I was "just going through a phase" and that gays should not be alloted any "special rights" recently told my mom "why don't they go get a civil partnership in vermont or Mass..."  My mom still didn't even understand as I explained the challenge of state laws versus federal laws and then even the number of states that have refused to recognize the two states the accomidate it.

I don't think the average American citizen realizes the real problem and if they did understand and got past all the fearmongering, they would just accept that laws like this actually promote a stable moral society instead of one that destabilizes it.

Alas, I will continue to tilt and windmills and accept my exile from my native born country and in ways I couldn't be happier, in others, my partner and I are very close to both sides of our families and property is just so much cheaper in the US.

I don't think the average American citizen realizes the real problem and if they did understand and got past all the fearmongering, they would just accept that laws like this actually promote a stable moral society instead of one that destabilizes it.

We had a debate about this at my last family reunion.  Only my conservative aunt, myself and my husband believed this was a non-issue that required no thought whatsoever.  My aunt is in a long term unmarried heterosexual relationship, and because of it she is acutely aware of the rights you lack when you aren't married.  She has no desire to get married, but doesn't understand why people shouldn't be allowed to if they desire.  The rest of the family seemed to think that allowing same sex couples to marry would be an insult to religon.  They just couldn't grasp the concept of a state-allowed marriage versus a church wedding/religious ceremony. 

I think the point being made is the UK has a visa for same sex couples whereas the US doesn't. 

Thank God you're here to point out what the point is in these complex posts, otherwise I suppose we'd all miss the point........

I don't think the average American citizen realizes the real problem and if they did understand and got past all the fearmongering, they would just accept that laws like this actually promote a stable moral society instead of one that destabilizes it.

I wish the US would catch up with the UK on this one, but I'm afraid that I think it'll be a long time coming. Remember -- nearly 50% of voting America elected Dubya twice.