Are You Checking Me Out?

It happens to me, too all the time. Aren't we lucky?

I've been here two years now and it only happened once.

Yeah, that's the kind of stuff we say when you catch us. 

Hehe... well, it happens. 

In London, I had the opposite. Men half a block away would immediately divert their eyes towards the ground or step off the curb and mothers I would pass every morning on their walk to school would grab hold of their child's hand. I thought it was the strangest thing until someone explained it to me.

I am relatively confident I am good looking and not a child abductor. 

In London, I had the opposite. Men half a block away would immediately divert their eyes towards the ground or step off the curb and mothers I would pass every morning on their walk to school would grab hold of their child's hand. I thought it was the strangest thing until someone explained it to me.

I am relatively confident I am good looking and not a child abductor. 

For some reason, they'll try to get my eye contact. It's creepy sometimes... I'll be strolling down the street minding my own business and they'll sometimes reach out and try to speak to me. My friend noticed this as well. I don't know why this is happening... 

It depends where you are living I suppose! I live in a leafy white neighborhood but walking in other neighborhoods the attention does change a bit.

If I encounter anyone while walking between my house and the metro station, or otherwise around the shops and stuff in the neighborhood, people tend to look me in the eye, smile, say hello, etc.--regardless of whether we have been introduced or not.  Once I get on the metro and head downtown, people stop doing that so much, although I think people around here just tend to look at each other more than I am used to.  I've noticed other people on the metro or the bus idly looking at the other passengers.

I guess I always assume people are looking at me because I am quite, ahem, plus-size.  Maybe I dress funny, too, and don't realize it?

Doesn't really happen in my neighborhood.  Sometimes the garbagemen or the shop owners setting up for the day say hi, but mostly we're all doing our own thing.  Definitely not on the tube.  Like sweetpeach, I'm from NYC, so you definitely wouldn't make eye contact when you're walking, people just don't do it. 

For some reason, they'll try to get my eye contact. It's creepy sometimes... I'll be strolling down the street minding my own business and they'll sometimes reach out and try to speak to me. My friend noticed this as well. I don't know why this is happening...  

Ok, I got followed today. And this is not the first time it has happened. I swear I don't try and get eye contact or spoke to anyone, but I'm usually just on my commute, wearing my head phones, just minding my own business. He tried speaking to me. Asking my name, where I lived, how old I am, if I'm single...   Obviously, I was NOT comfortable with that! Eventually, he got the message but after about a half hour. Has this happened to anyone else? Thankfully, it was in the early afternoon and there were plenty of people nearby, but it still bothered me...

Can anyone give me advice in case it happens again and there is nobody around...? Again, not the first time this has happened.

Wow, that sounds terrible! Where were you when this happened?

Ok, I got followed today. And this is not the first time it has happened. I swear I don't try and get eye contact or spoke to anyone, but I'm usually just on my commute, wearing my head phones, just minding my own business. He tried speaking to me. Asking my name, where I lived, how old I am, if I'm single...   Obviously, I was NOT comfortable with that! Eventually, he got the message but after about a half hour. Has this happened to anyone else?

At least once a week when I lived in London... never in Scotland (touch wood!)

Ok, I got followed today. And this is not the first time it has happened. I swear I don't try and get eye contact or spoke to anyone, but I'm usually just on my commute, wearing my head phones, just minding my own business. He tried speaking to me. Asking my name, where I lived, how old I am, if I'm single...  Obviously, I was NOT comfortable with that! Eventually, he got the message but after about a half hour. Has this happened to anyone else? Thankfully, it was in the early afternoon and there were plenty of people nearby, but it still bothered me...

Can anyone give me advice in case it happens again and there is nobody around...? Again, not the first time this has happened.

Were you near any shops or anything?  Did you answer him when he asked you questions?

From the Suzy Lamplugh Trust:

http://www.suzylamplugh.org/personal-safety/national-personal-safety-day-2009/personal-safety-tips/

http://www.suzylamplugh.org/personal-safety/personal-safety-tips/on-the-streets/

Were you near any shops or anything?  Did you answer him when he asked you questions?

I was near Deptford high street. I said it was 'inappropriate' as a response, but perhaps if there is a next time, I won't utter a word. He doesn't know how to find me or where I live or any information like that if that was what you were referring to.

If you were by any shops, ducking into one might be an option if this ever happens again.

I was near Deptford high street. I said it was 'inappropriate' as a response, but perhaps if there is a next time, I won't utter a word. He doesn't know how to find me or where I live or any information like that if that was what you were referring to.

Next time walk straight into a shop and tell them what's going on.  Don't worry about being polite or a good girl. Get your phone out.  This is wrong and it's scary.  Have a look at the Suzy Lamplugh Trust page.  There's some good advice.