Dress for a very, very posh English wedding?! HELP?!?!?!?

They have a good return policy so i can order from them, in a few sizes, and return the stuff that does not fit, which is good!

Check out www.vouchercodes.com. There's a Boden offer on for 15% off + free shipping + free returns!

Thank you for the voucher link!!!!

Yea, 3-4 occasions requiring dressy dress seems really excessive for one wedding. Yea, a wedding weekend is nice and all but there's no reason why anything more than the actual wedding should be formal. The evening before sounds a bit like a rehearsal dinner in the US and while I wouldn't wear jeans and a T shirt to most rehearsal dinners, I'd imagine that most people would already have an appropriate outfit in their closet already (ie, a cute sundress or skirt or slacks with a cute top). Day-after brunches are also common and great but decidedly casual, in my view, where jeans and a nice top would be totally fine. This sounds way over the top!

It reminds me of that Debra Messing film The Wedding Date http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0372532/

HAHAHAHA!!!! YES!!!!!

I have been reading this thread and I agree that it is outrageous. It makes me think of my upcoming wedding weekend, which has been posted about excessively, but at least I only have to wear 2 dresses and they don't have to be super posh.

What is with these people? This just isn't the time to expect people to be spending loads of money on other people's special events. Many people are struggling just to pay their everyday expenses.

I'm glad that you've gotten good advice about what to wear. I think you wil be able to find something that looks great on you and doesn't cost a ridiculous amount of money.

I really think it is rude of this woman to just expect that everyone in the world has this kind of money. The package hotel is 400 pounds for the three nights, and we have to pay like 200 to get there... and all the dresses, and my husbands insanely overpriced suit from one of the most expensive places in England... And of course let us not forget that she has registered at Harrods for items costing 200 and up.

I think I hate her...

If it's such a posh wedding, I hope you can at least expect an open bar out of it!    Maybe bring a big bag so you can stuff some extra cake in it to take home!  Make it worth your while!

I think it will be a fabulous adventure....I doubt you will be invited to a load of wedding like this...DH said damn that sounds like a royal wedding haha

As much as it sucks to fork out some money, your DH is in the wedding so must be a close friend and this means this couple will be in your life I assume.
Enjoy it for what it is even if you don't spend ungodly amounts of money on dresses.  She may turn out to be down to earth and want to go camping (LOL) maybe its a family money thing.

Either way I think you will have a fabulous time and I want a full recount of the events and a few pics wouldnt hurt either ;-)

enjoy hon!

It is true that I may not be invited to many more weddings like this (hopefully!) - but formal events will come up, because of the school my husband went to, and who some of his friends are... But I am sure this will be the most over the top of them all. Even my husband has said that it is totally over the top!

It sucks that it is the first one! I would like to ease into this sort of social event slowly, ya know?

It will be open bar, and very nice foods... The woman doing the catering used to cook for the members of the royal family - I kid you not. But, I am not looking forward to it at all - I would rather read a book. Spend my few funds on household items that we badly need.

I have met the bride, and she will not be going camping in this lifetime. When I met her, we had traveled up to the cider farm, and it was all muddy and it was raining, and she was wearing a maroon silk designer dress, high heels, and a long black velvet coat!
ON A MUDDY CIDER FARM!!!!!!
IN THE MIDDLE OF THE AFTERNOON!!!!!
And she was drinking champagne... and eating caviar for lunch.

Her soon to be husband (my husbands friend) was in torn Levi jeans, a rock band t-shirt, wellies, and an odd cap, and drinking cider... while playing Bob Dylan songs on his old guitar.
I like him a lot.
He owns the cider farm and it is lovely. It is a hobby of his.

Neither of them WORK for a living. Nor have they EVER worked. I assume they never will...

My husband is a builder, and I am an out of work librarian. They live on a different planet than we do!

Just because they've registered at Harrod's (or anywhere, for that matter) doesn't mean you have to buy them something they've registered for - especially not if you can't afford a £200 gift. I have an intense dislike of registries (that's another whole story), so I never buy anything from a list, on principle. Also, I assume that if I'm a close enough friend to be invited to a person's wedding, then I'm close enough to know their taste and choose something else that I know they'll like. I always buy 'off-registry' presents.

Yeah, my husband said we are just sending them a bottle of champagne and chocolates in a gift basket from a shop in town that he likes.

If you go the ASOS route here are 5 pound off 20 spend codes that I'm not using. They are 1 time use only and expire June 30
73347CDD5E27

73D3E2679701

6E8186B1B64F

edit: just saw this dress on slickdeals. $13 to ship to the US so it might be pricey to send to the UK but at $10 I think you might not have to pay customs charges.
http://www.davidsbridal.com/Product_Short-Cotton-Strapless-with-Back-Tie-F13818_Outlet-Outlet-Bridesmaid-Dresses?langId=-1&currency=GBP&catalogId=10051&storeId=10052&postbackURL=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.davidsbridal.com%2FProduct_Short-Cotton-Strapless-with-Back-Tie-F13818_Outlet-Outlet-Bridesmaid-Dresses&y=12&Country=GB&e4x.country=GI&x=131

THANK YOU
THANK YOU
THANK YOU
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

UPDATE:
Well, the weekend is here... And we were going to leave tomorrow morning, and return Monday morning... But my hubby has FINALLY come to his senses.
We CANNOT AFFORD THIS 3 NIGHT WEDDING!

So, rather than that, so he can work on Friday and Saturday, we are going up on Sat morning - and we are driving because it IS cheaper and takes only 3 and a half hours rather that 5 hours on the train - and returning on Sunday.

So, YAY!!!!!!!! ONLY ONE NIGHT!!!!!

Which means I do NOT need dress for Friday!

I got a 20 pound dress at T.K. Max (marked down from 140 pounds!), and 40 pound shoes (marked down from 90!), and a 7 pound black wrap (charity shop, silk!). I borrowed one of those silly hat/feather things from my hubby's mom, in black, but I might not wear it.
The dress looks very expensive (although not next to everyone else wearing Vera Wang - but I do not care at all!). It is maroon, sleeveless, to the knee. The shoes are awesome - black velvet. I borrowed a black velvet beaded purse from his sister. It is super cute and cool.
ALL GOOD.

I am wearing the dress to the wedding AND the party after - I do not care if it is socially "uncool" to her. (Because she is mean - she told me at a dinner party full of people, an hour after I was discussing my visa, that "immigration was ruining England and should be banned." Nice, huh?)

And on Sunday I am wearing something I already have - BECAUSE MY STUFF FROM NYC IS BEING DELIVERED TODAY!!!!!

Thank you all for your help!

That sounds sensible. Good for you!