If you take the approach of neither encouraging or discouraging it, may I ask how you will handle the child when he/she goes to nursery and uses such words? There will surely be censure there. Won't it be confusing when they are reprimanded in school for using foul language, yet at home it is ignored?
It's a good question and I wasn't really going to go any further into what my husband and I personally do because I didn't think it was relevant, but I'm never loathe to talk when asked.
I'll use my six-year-old stepdaughter as an example. We've acted the same with her. She uses f*ck whenever she wants at home. We have always been of the opinion that language is language and that making some off limits to children is actually more confusing than instructive. Anyway, like I said, she pretty much says what she wants to when she's with us. She doesn't walk around constantly saying f*ck or s*it or damn, but she does use those words. The really amazing thing is this: when she's at school (or when she was at nursery) she actually self-censors herself. She understands, almost intuitively, that some language is ok in some places, but not so ok in others.
Personally, I think it's much, much more confusing for a child not to be able to use words they hear than an explanation that in some
places certain language will get a different response than at home or with their parents.
I raised my 16-year-old son the same way. He uses strident language at home but not as much as some might expect. He's an incredibly articulate young man who expresses himself exceptionally. I'd like to add that he's also studying Politics, History and Economics in college, but that's more because I'm proud of him.
Understandably, our perception of language and how we deal with our children in regards to that won't suit everyone. I don't expect it to. My main purpose in posting was to try and impart some of my experience to lil evo as she seemed rather distressed at her toddler's behaviour.
