Lots of Questions - Kids 8 and 10 1/2

Cloth? LUXURY.

and you know it had to come......

Ok, I can see why I got the reactions I did re: My kid statements, but it was not that I was worried that Wokingham is a horrid place, but more the uncertainty of not knowing which school they are going to...for weeks or a month would be a ton of anxiety for them.  Of course I know the benefits of moving to the UK for us and them or I wouldn't be considering it strongly!!  If it was my husband and myself we would pack two suitcases and just set off.  😁 yes kids are resilient and I know they will adjust but my youngest already suffers from anxiety so I would want to make the initial change as quick as possible...rip the band aid off! Thinking maybe it makes sense for me to go over first and get the process going.  Also, I know things don't move the same as the us.  I am not expecting that for myself nor do I want an "American" experience, otherwise why go??  My husband is Croatian so I am very familiar with life moving differently which is fabulous, but kids do complicate things.  Also odd that folks that don't have kids are on the parenting forum....  I think parents understand my concern and initial reaction though possibly an overreaction.  My kids are everything to me.  I will only go if it is in their best interest as well as mine.

Oh and did someone say Costco??  I thought I would finally be rid of the craziness that is that store on a weekend!!

There's a Costco in Reading.  Helps so much when I'm feeling homesick.   

I literally lol'd. Edinburgh? Not quite known for its deprivation. However, I live across the water in Fife and we do have to survive on shoe leather and turnips. It's a hard life here up north...

Seriously?  I thought Edinburgh had some rough bits.  Wasn't that what Trainspotting was all about?  Granted I've only visited so I have no real knowledge. 

Ok, I can see why I got the reactions I did re: My kid statements, but it was not that I was worried that Wokingham is a horrid place, but more the uncertainty of not knowing which school they are going to...for weeks or a month would be a ton of anxiety for them.  Of course I know the benefits of moving to the UK for us and them or I wouldn't be considering it strongly!!  If it was my husband and myself we would pack two suitcases and just set off.  yes kids are resilient and I know they will adjust but my youngest already suffers from anxiety so I would want to make the initial change as quick as possible...rip the band aid off! Thinking maybe it makes sense for me to go over first and get the process going.  Also, I know things don't move the same as the us.  I am not expecting that for myself nor do I want an "American" experience, otherwise why go??  My husband is Croatian so I am very familiar with life moving differently which is fabulous, but kids do complicate things.  Also odd that folks that don't have kids are on the parenting forum....  I think parents understand my concern and initial reaction though possibly an overreaction.  My kids are everything to me.  I will only go if it is in their best interest as well as mine.

I don't think it's odd, that people without kids may have responded to your post.  Many people probably read the posts in chronological order and may not even be aware what particular bit of the forum things are posted in.   

Looks like all the replies you got were good ones , from parents or not.

For what it's worth,  we were friends with a family from Berlingame Ca who moved to South London for his work and stayed 3 years.  They had one of their kids here on the NHS as well.  Their kids went to my daughter's school (the oldest was 7) and I think they were very happy with the quality of the school and had a great time in general.  It's just a normal neighbourhood school.  The main point was that it was an overwhelmingly positive experience for their kids.  It's possible that their kids started in the middle of the year and I remember the little American girl being treated like a celebrity.

I hope if you decide to go for it, the same thing happens for you guys.

Well there is a body of childhood development work which says that stability is good for children. One of the bad effects of poverty is childhood chaos....or vice versa maybe. So yes, moving them to a strange country and dumping them in a bad school might be worrying.

But perhaps something I use for my own justification in taking the plunge with a small child...I do believe that children are very resilient, and that if you have a strong family unit, one where the kids feel safe and secure, then a move can be good; they will understand that even with great change, the family functions well.

I mean we lived without furniture for a couple of months here, and while it did my back no favours, my daughter didn't seem to mind at all.....she had her laptop. But there is quite a bit of second guessing.

I'll be honest, if I was in your shoes, I would likely be questioning the move due to kids as well.  If it was a permanent move and my kids would be changing school systems once, I would do it.  I would do everything I could to make the transition as easy as possible.  There is every chance we will move to the US one day (all depends on how my daughter does under the UK school system.  I personally am a fan of the US system.  This is my own bias and I'm not trying to project onto you).

I personally would only do a temporary move if my child(ren) were staying in an American school.  I wouldn't want to move them from the US system to the UK system.  Just to move them from the UK system to the US system in a few years again.  Just my 2p.

If the move is permanent or temporary depends on the visa type.  As you already work for your employer, it would have to be a temporary visa.

If you do come to the Reading area to check it out and want to meet up, let me know.     I run a new but active Americans in the Reading area meetup group.

Children, just like all humans, aren't a bloc, but a collection of individuals. Personally, I would have loved to spend a few years in England as a child. I found my lovely stable midwestern upbringing stifling and wanted adventure. Other children would hate being uprooted and put in a foreign environment. Only you can know your kids well enough to make that kind of a decision for them.

One other option might be to get your kids a tutor to keep them up to speed until they can start school. A British tutor could help prepare them for what they'll experience in a British school as well. Something to consider .

Might not be an option for you.....but there should be a private/international school in Cobham I used to take sports teams to for competition. Seemed like a nice school back then (80's). I know we used to play another in London (American school in London), but I think that is further from Reading. Also TASIS school which might not be too far from Reading. Probably ££ involved with any of those decisions.

I literally lol'd. Edinburgh? Not quite known for its deprivation.

LOL.. me too!  Made my day! 
It's usually Glasgow that gets tarred with that particular brush!

I don't think it's odd, that people without kids may have responded to your post.  Many people probably read the posts in chronological order and may not even be aware what particular bit of the forum things are posted in.   

True.  I just read the link to 'most recent posts'. If it's not included in those 10 pages, I probably won't see it.

True.  I just read the link to 'most recent posts'. If it's not included in those 10 pages, I probably won't see it.

Yeah, I just have the Recent Unread Topics'  page bookmarked and I open each topic from that page. Most of the time, I don't even notice which forum section they've been posted in.

Yeah, I just have the Recent Unread Topics'  page bookmarked and I open each topic from that page. Most of the time, I don't even notice which forum section they've been posted in.

I do the same thing Albatross! Haha. I knew I couldn't be the only one.