Who actually PLANS on staying in the UK?

Hi Sandy,

I think you will have a better time in a larger city.  It seems that in larger cities they tend to be a bit more willing to have friendly relationships with us "ugly Americans".   :-/  I have never had a problem in Canterbury or other large cities only here in Herne Bay.    

As far as moving that really is not an option right now.  George might have a job in the states.  It is a 50/50 chance but it is worth the wait because he would be one of the owners of the startup.  Hence, the no moving.  We are trying to also save a large down payment for a house.  Right now we are looking for land incase we do not move to the states.  And as we both know Kent is a bit over built already.  I would love to move but I have also put a lot of work into fixing this apartment up.  I mean every room has been done.  I hate to give up all that work for some nasty laddette women.

If you do not mind can I give you some advice on the intrusive ex.  Please do not think this will happen to you but it is best to have a game plan in place for you and your Soon To Be Husband.  First I would talk indepth to your STBH about how he will react to his ex when she over steps her place.  Such as you inform him what the boundries should be and ask him how he will handle the ex.  George and I discussed Tracey indepth but never really discussed how we will handle her once we became married.  That caused issues.  I felt George took her emotional well being over mine time and again.  George felt he was trying to be the good guy to both of us.  The wrong stance was that George did not take my feelings into account and should have only been considerate of me.

Again I have no idea if your STBH has children with this woman.  It might make it worse.  In my view and experiance with all of George's exs they seem to never give up.  Tracey used her daughter as a means to keep ties to George and so does Irene.  Both of these children are not George's and I found it odd that they expected George to be there for them.  Plus I find it odd that they have no problem calling and demending time with him. Our marriage almost ended because George would not stand up to these women.  In all honesty talk to your STBH and both of you come to POJA (Policy of Joint Agreement) on how to handle the ex.  You never know she might be nice but I have only one of George's ex that has minded her own business and not tried to cause a wedge between us.  Just my thought.  I would hate to see you get hurt over any misunderstandings.