Great blog post... sorry you had so much trouble getting to the UK!
Just a couple of clarifications on what you wrote:
- you can actually marry as a visitor in the UK, BUT you need to apply for a Marriage Visitor Visa, instead of a regular visitor visa, and you cannot stay more than 6 months. So, like with the regular visitor visa, you have to show you have enough money to support your trip, that you are only visiting and will leave within 6 months, and that you have ties (a job and a home) to return to in the US after the wedding... plus you have to show you are making plans to marry in the UK within the allowed 6 months.
- after you applied for your spousal visa, the 12 weeks you were told in the email is based on business days, not calendar days. So, they did actually mean 12 weeks (12 x 5 working days), NOT 16 weeks.
Their processing standards target is:
- 95% of settlement applications processed in 12 weeks (60 working days)
- 100% of settlement applications processed in 24 weeks (120 working days)