COVID-19 Wedding Restrictions (England)

Right. I'm sure most of us who are planning to marry in the UK this year know about the new restrictions for weddings. If not, there is the link to the BBC article explaining: https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-53217342 [nofollow] .


I completely understand the need to be careful and to have guidelines, but it's hard not to be disappointed or frustrated. Our plan was for me to move to the UK in August and to get married late October. Right now, the biggest problem is even submitting the application and getting a biometrics appointment so I can be approved on time (which is looking more like a distant dream each day). Regarding these restrictions, I really don't mind having a small wedding. However, I would like to have my mom and sister present (my mom lives in CA and my sister in FL). It's sad that, on top of the two-week quarantine in place that might make it difficult if not impossible for them to come, celebrating would not be the same with social distancing.


My fiancé and I are exploring all of our options, from going ahead with 30 people max (including my mom and sister) in October (or whenever possible this year) to just having a legal ceremony with a couple of witnesses then having a large celebration with vow renewal next year when it will likely be safer to do so.

As my fiancé and I are discussing, I'm curious what other couples are thinking or planning to do. Feel free to vent or brainstorm if you're in the same boat. Also, any advice would be really appreciated!

We're in Scotland not England but otherwise in a similar boat: big wedding planned for this week was cancelled ages ago, going ahead with a tiny wedding in a few weeks and then will plan the church ceremony and the reception for next year when it is safe.

I emphatically told my family not to come and we're going ahead without them -- not because I don't love them but because it wasn't worth the risk to have them travel, even though they were more than willing to go ahead with a two week quarantine on each end. Especially when, as you say, a wedding which compiles with the rules won't feel much like the wedding you were expecting.

We're thinking of this as 'the marriage' and the actual church ceremony and reception next year as 'the wedding', which helps to not make what we're doing in a few weeks feel like a sad version of what we wanted. We've changed almost every detail as well, other than my fiancé is wearing the same tie and shoes he was planning to in the first place.

In your case, given how America is handling it, I'd suggest planning just the legal ceremony with witnesses when you make it over and then having a larger celebration when safe. My whole wedding was pulled out from underneath me, so hopefully you can be spared the same stress and only have to plan one wedding!

Right. I'm sure most of us who are planning to marry in the UK this year know about the new restrictions for weddings. If not, there is the link to the BBC article explaining: https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-53217342.


I completely understand the need to be careful and to have guidelines, but it's hard not to be disappointed or frustrated. Our plan was for me to move to the UK in August and to get married late October. Right now, the biggest problem is even submitting the application and getting a biometrics appointment so I can be approved on time (which is looking more like a distant dream each day). Regarding these restrictions, I really don't mind having a small wedding. However, I would like to have my mom and sister present (my mom lives in CA and my sister in FL). It's sad that, on top of the two-week quarantine in place that might make it difficult if not impossible for them to come, celebrating would not be the same with social distancing.


My fiancé and I are exploring all of our options, from going ahead with 30 people max (including my mom and sister) in October (or whenever possible this year) to just having a legal ceremony with a couple of witnesses then having a large celebration with vow renewal next year when it will likely be safer to do so.

As my fiancé and I are discussing, I'm curious what other couples are thinking orpor to do. Feel free to vent or brainstorm if you're in the same boat. Also, any advice would be really appreciated!

I would go with option 2 if I were you. Marry with just the two of you and plan to have the celebration sometime in the future when it is safe(r) for everyone.
At least that way you can move on with your lives together. Even just making the decision will make you feel a lot better too. 

We're in Scotland not England but otherwise in a similar boat: big wedding planned for this week was cancelled ages ago, going ahead with a tiny wedding in a few weeks and then will plan the church ceremony and the reception for next year when it is safe.

I emphatically told my family not to come and we're going ahead without them -- not because I don't love them but because it wasn't worth the risk to have them travel, even though they were more than willing to go ahead with a two week quarantine on each end. Especially when, as you say, a wedding which compiles with the rules won't feel much like the wedding you were expecting.

We're thinking of this as 'the marriage' and the actual church ceremony and reception next year as 'the wedding', which helps to not make what we're doing in a few weeks feel like a sad version of what we wanted. We've changed almost every detail as well, other than my fiancé is wearing the same tie and shoes he was planning to in the first place.

In your case, given how America is handling it, I'd suggest planning just the legal ceremony with witnesses when you make it over and then having a larger celebration when safe. My whole wedding was pulled out from underneath me, so hopefully you can be spared the same stress and only have to plan one wedding!

You make so many great points and seem to have an appropriate mindset about everything. Having a wedding this year is definitely more about the marriage than the aesthetics or large celebration. I think there are slightly different rules in Scotland than England, but the concept is pretty much the same. Nothing big or fancy. Make it legal and get out.

I know what you mean about family. I'm sure my mom would be willing to endure a two-week quarantine to see me get married, but I can't help but think it's not quite worth it. It wouldn't be worth taking her so much time off work for what definitely wouldn't be a holiday and what could actually be a risk travelling. It would be hard to make the decision for her not to come, but it would also make so much sense. How did your family take the news? Were they understanding about it?

It's good to hear that you'll be getting married in a few weeks' time! Was it difficult to make new arrangements to get married? Or was there easily availability for a simple civil ceremony?

Regarding my wedding planning, we had the main details sorted: date, church, reception venue all booked and save the dates sent out early. I picked out my wedding dress here in the States in March. I actually had a first alteration fitting just before lockdown. My weight fluctuates a lot and, after talking to my mom about it, thought it would be good to get the dress hemmed here in CA and taken in when I moved to the UK. A good decision looking back, as I've definitely put on a bit of weight during lockdown! 😬 I realize this isn't HALF as much effort as so many people put into their wedding before having to cancel everything. I am a bit fortunate that way. It's still a shame to see the planning and arrangements we already made get pushed, although we will likely ask the venue if we can just move our reservation to next year. Fingers crossed, they'll be accommodating as I'm sure many people are in the same predicament.

I would go with option 2 if I were you. Marry with just the two of you and plan to have the celebration sometime in the future when it is safe(r) for everyone.
At least that way you can move on with your lives together. Even just making the decision will make you feel a lot better too. 

I think you are right. I think making the decision will be difficult- putting a pin in everything we had planned so far and having to put aside our previous ideas of what our wedding would look like. But I'm sure we'll feel better after we figure it out and make our decisions about this year final. It's definitely about starting our lives together   rather than the details of a single day.