Changing name after marriage vs keeping your own name

*applauds* Amen!!! That was the best thing I've ever read!!

I to was the same, couldn't wait to take my husband's last name because I had gone so long with an awkward maiden name. Not because it was bad but just because when everyone hears it they haven't a clue how to spell it and when they do finally get it spelled they think that I'm spanish (I'm not I'm Italian) but that's how it comes out...my maiden name by the way is Pojeta....said just like it's spelled no 'j' that sounds like an 'h' in spanish names lol...but I love my new last name, 'Humphreys'...very English 

Good luck anyways hun!!!

x x x - Missy 

Songmistress, Ill take Eff over Boner anyday! lol But Leader is great!
Pebs 

I worked with a guy whose last name was "Pecker."  Brian Pecker.  (And went to high school with Brian Dick, but that's another tale.)
He told me that it actually was pronounced "Peck-AR", but that he never bothered telling people that because nobody ever believed him.  They just thought he was trying to get out of being called Pecker.  Poor thing.  He actually had it changed to "Peck" while we were there.

When I got married last summer I couldn't wait to change my name to my hubby's- I'd never been overly fond of my maiden name - but also really wanted to take his name- to show that, like peedal said, for traditional reasons and to make it obvious that we're married hehe

I did all the changing of cards, etc and then felt a real sadness.  Sort of a loss of identity! I was Jennifer D for 31 years of my life. Now, I no longer had the same name as my immediate family..especially my brothers ...and realized that I would never again answer to the same name! It's taken me a bit, but I do love my new name. It's a sign of my future with my husband and will be the name our children have.

I'm glad I changed it...but it's not for everyone!

Jen

My family just acted like my name hadn't changed at all, but then, my family also acts like I never got married and don't have a child to worry about.

The only thing I hated giving up was my initials.  I used to be able to initial everything "Sam", just like that.  Bi S little a little m.  Then M wasn't my last initial anymore...and Saf just isn't the same.  Sometimes I use "Samf".  But I still miss Sam.

My Mom's are the best, though.  She went from "SLD" to "SLM."  Now the people she works with for years call her "Slim."  Lucky!

I worked with a guy whose last name was "Pecker."  Brian Pecker.  (And went to high school with Brian Dick, but that's another tale.)
He told me that it actually was pronounced "Peck-AR", but that he never bothered telling people that because nobody ever believed him.  They just thought he was trying to get out of being called Pecker.  Poor thing.  He actually had it changed to "Peck" while we were there.

My fiance' told me about this woman he worked with whose last name was Carr.  She named her son "Wayne".  Ok, say it fast now, both first and last name together, and see what it sounds like! LOL!  Jamie couldn't believe a mother would be so cruel to her own boy!

omg that is horrible.....horribley funny!!!

can't believe someone would name their kid that....no thought went into that!!

x x x - Missy 

My fiance' told me about this woman he worked with whose last name was Carr.  She named her son "Wayne".  Ok, say it fast now, both first and last name together, and see what it sounds like! LOL!  Jamie couldn't believe a mother would be so cruel to her own boy!

Try doing a google search for Michael Hunt - 2,870,000 hits. Unbelievable.

On the subject of bad names, I have a coupla funny ones... but before I continue, although I will use asterisks where appropriate, I must warn you that this posting contains bad language...

If you don't mind that, read on!

My grandparents had a friend whose last name was A**hole--- pronounced "ah-SHOLE"... One day, I was sniggering to a friend, who topped that one, saying that one day he was at the DMV and the member of staff who was calling out the names stammered, "Um.... er..... would a Mrs. S**t Head please come forward..."

And this woman stood up, and said, angrily, "It's pronounced 'shih-THAYD"

!!!

Heck, I'd keep my current last name...

I'm definitely keeping my maiden name when I get married.  'Clark'  Nice, simple, easy to spell....although everyone keeps trying to add an 'e' to it here in the UK!    Of course, my fiance has a nice generic last name too, but I've never wanted to change my name.  I like it because it comes from both sides of my family- my mother's maiden name was Clark, and then she married my father- a Clark!  Gotta love those incredibly common last names.   

I've never felt the urge to change my name to show I "belong" to someone, cause I don't feel a marriage works like that.  I don't feel the need to be identified with my husband, I'm a person in my own right, regardless to whom I'm married.  Never had a problem with anyone else changing theirs, just not my cup of tea. 

I think the 'Shi-theyd' is a bit of an urban myth. I've heard that many times before! Along with 'oranh zhello' and 'leh mohn zhello' (orange jello and lemon jello)!

I'm having a bit of a hard time with the name thing. My last name is so unique, if I posted it here and you Googled it, everyone with that name would be related to me and you could find me a little too easily! 

It's essentially a made up name. Yes, it was made up by men, but by my Grandfather and his brother in the 1920s. They changed it from Cohen to try to avoid anti-semitism in the US.

So, it's a relatively new name but it's a rather odd one (a bit of a pain to spell for some for some inexplicable reason). Add that to the fact that my Dad died when I was 9 and there are so few of us with that name now... I just can't see giving it up. I've spent 34 years with it. Changing would be so hard.

If I'd married my last ex, there would be no way I'd have changed my name. I hated his last name! But my DF here has a pretty cool name - Havelock (as in the General in Trafalagar Square). But the really odd bit is that there's a real similarity to his last name and mine. A lot of the same letters and quite a bit of alliteration going on.

So... do I change it totally? Do I hyphenate? Do I drop the middle name and move my maiden name to middle and use his last name? Do I use one professionally and one for legal and personal stuff? The possibilites are numerous and I'm still stuck.

I'm not worried about kids. They're adaptable and won't really care. There are loads of families with multiple names. I do *like* the idea of us all having a family name which is why I'm leaning towards adding his to mine (hyphenation or whatever). And kids would just take his. But still, it's really driving me mad. It would be a mouthful, but right now my thinking is that my name is already a bit complicated (odd spellings of first and middle name as well as 'made up' last name). So why not make it just a bit more complicated?!

I was going to keep my maiden name because I was used to it, it sounded great with my first name, and because I used it professionally.  The longer we've been married, though, the more I've started to use DH's last name.

At first it was Lola Ellen Maiden, then it was Lola Ellen Maiden Married. 

Then it became Lola E. Maiden Married. 

Then Lola Maiden Married. 

Now, at work, I'm just Lola Married.  My NIN and bank account are Lola Married.  And I have the SSN form in an addressed envelope to send to the Embassy to change from Lola Maiden to Lola Married.

So, I guess the "more married" we became, the more Lola Married I've become!   

So, I guess the "more married" we became, the more Lola Married I've become!   

Yeah, I won't be surprised it that happens to me, too. And I won't correct people, except professionally. But I think it'll take a few years if it does happen.

That said, a Canadian friend told me that over there you can legally get away with any permutation of your maiden and married name. So she's Katherine Maiden by choice but she could sign any document (banking, legal, etc) with that, her maiden and her husbands's name, or just her husband's name and have no problems. Very cool.

I've never felt the urge to change my name to show I "belong" to someone, cause I don't feel a marriage works like that.  I don't feel the need to be identified with my husband, I'm a person in my own right, regardless to whom I'm married.  Never had a problem with anyone else changing theirs, just not my cup of tea. 

So nice to see diversity.  I'm the other side of the coin.    I DO feel the need to be identified (and am, indeed, proud to be identified) with my husband.  I want to declare to the world that I belong to him and that he loves me so much that he would take me as his own and make me his forever (and one way to do that is to take his name).  I was talking about this last night to him.  I said that I know that some women would be offended and would resent it if everywhere they went all they were called and refered to as was "so-and-so's wife".  Now, I have - what I think is - a beautiful first name.....but, I would be thrilled to hear everywhere I go, "Oh, there goes Jamie's wife."  It makes me smile just thinking about it.

Do I take my identity from him?  Sure I do.  He's the only reason I breathe.  Yeah, some may think I am extreme....but, that's just me.   

So nice to see diversity.  I'm the other side of the coin.    I DO feel the need to be identified (and am, indeed, proud to be identified) with my husband.  I want to declare to the world that I belong to him and that he loves me so much that he would take me as his own and make me his forever (and one way to do that is to take his name).  I was talking about this last night to him.  I said that I know that some women would be offended and would resent it if everywhere they went all they were called and refered to as was "so-and-so's wife".  Now, I have - what I think is - a beautiful first name.....but, I would be thrilled to hear everywhere I go, "Oh, there goes Jamie's wife."  It makes me smile just thinking about it.

Do I take my identity from him?  Sure I do.  He's the only reason I breathe.  Yeah, some may think I am extreme....but, that's just me.   

Much how I feel about my husband!