My wife and I have been through this before, albeit a different country's visa process, but very similar. I arrived in the U.S. on a fiance's K-1 visa in May of 2015, and we filed for permanent resident after our wedding. We are completely aware of how ambiguous and misleading government agencies can be about their own policies. That process alone took almost a year for approval before I could even arrive in the U.S. (just waiting, we provided everything up front without any refusals).
Either way, we'll see what they have to say and then take all of what we've been told into consideration to determine our next steps. We have no intention of jumping the gun and canceling our application before hearing that response, though we're grateful for the experienced tips and help provided thus far.