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Topic: I need help!  (Read 10425 times)

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I need help!
« on: February 05, 2020, 08:14:13 PM »
I apologize this is so long.

So here is my situation. I came here on a fiancé visa with plans to marry in november 2018. when i first arrived things were weird between me and my fiancé, but i figured he was still just dealing with his father’s suicide. as the wedding got closer, things got better and everything seemed to be fine. 4 days before the wedding i was walking the dog, got back to find the house locked (i didn’t have the key), and my fiancé gone. he then sent me a text message saying he was having a mental breakdown after losing his job and his mother taking a turn for the worst (i knew nothing about those things). he was going to thailand and i never saw or heard from him again. i in turn had a mental breakdown of sorts and just fell into depression. my dog and i had to stay with random people while i tried to figure out what to do next. i filed for an extension on my visa, but because i had no fixed address, any response i got went back to my fiancé’s home, and i never heard from him.

i’ve been barely surviving on the help of friends (by that, i mean i eat a cheap meal about every 3 days and i sleep in a tiny room that my dog sitter had). i assume by this point my visa has been refused and i’m an overstayer, and the truth is i do really want to go back to america. i have a friend in seattle who offered me a place to stay and a job...

here’s the problem tho: when i came here i spent so much money on bringing my dog, cause i can’t live without him. i lost my family in america and after losing everything here, he’s literally the only thing i have left. i wouldn’t have survived this past year without him, and the thought of losing him now is just the last straw for me.  but my depression and financial situation has become so bad, i can’t even begin to figure out how to get him back. and i’ve basically been hiding cause i’m afraid if i’m caught i’ll be sent back without him and i wouldn’t be able to handle that. not after everything that’s happened.

i’ve reached my breaking point and i’m begging for any help i can. i just want this to be over.


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Re: I need help!
« Reply #1 on: February 05, 2020, 08:38:22 PM »
I apologize this is so long.

So here is my situation. I came here on a fiancé visa with plans to marry in november 2018. when i first arrived things were weird between me and my fiancé, but i figured he was still just dealing with his father’s suicide. as the wedding got closer, things got better and everything seemed to be fine. 4 days before the wedding i was walking the dog, got back to find the house locked (i didn’t have the key), and my fiancé gone. he then sent me a text message saying he was having a mental breakdown after losing his job and his mother taking a turn for the worst (i knew nothing about those things). he was going to thailand and i never saw or heard from him again. i in turn had a mental breakdown of sorts and just fell into depression. my dog and i had to stay with random people while i tried to figure out what to do next. i filed for an extension on my visa, but because i had no fixed address, any response i got went back to my fiancé’s home, and i never heard from him.

i’ve been barely surviving on the help of friends (by that, i mean i eat a cheap meal about every 3 days and i sleep in a tiny room that my dog sitter had). i assume by this point my visa has been refused and i’m an overstayer, and the truth is i do really want to go back to america. i have a friend in seattle who offered me a place to stay and a job...

here’s the problem tho: when i came here i spent so much money on bringing my dog, cause i can’t live without him. i lost my family in america and after losing everything here, he’s literally the only thing i have left. i wouldn’t have survived this past year without him, and the thought of losing him now is just the last straw for me.  but my depression and financial situation has become so bad, i can’t even begin to figure out how to get him back. and i’ve basically been hiding cause i’m afraid if i’m caught i’ll be sent back without him and i wouldn’t be able to handle that. not after everything that’s happened.

i’ve reached my breaking point and i’m begging for any help i can. i just want this to be over.

I remember you! Welcome back.  :)

No doubt about it, you're illegal.
That's the bad news, the good news is that as far as I'm aware, it's very much cheaper and easier to fly a dog back to the US than it is to get them here in the first place.

As far as you leaving, I have no idea if you can just get on a plane or if there will be repercussions due to your situation. The others will be along soon though, they may well know.

Perhaps your friend could loan you the funds to get home?


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Re: I need help!
« Reply #2 on: February 05, 2020, 08:42:07 PM »
We’ve been wondering what happened with you.  Glad you still have your pupper.

Get in touch with the embassy. They will help you with a repatriation loan. You’ll have time to pay it off, but will be without your passport while you do.  There are programs to help you get back on your feet.

Keep us posted and don’t become a stranger!


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Re: I need help!
« Reply #3 on: February 05, 2020, 08:47:59 PM »
We’ve been wondering what happened with you.  Glad you still have your pupper.

Get in touch with the embassy. They will help you with a repatriation loan. You’ll have time to pay it off, but will be without your passport while you do.  There are programs to help you get back on your feet.

Keep us posted and don’t become a stranger!

the no passport thing till i pay off the loan isn’t an issue cause this whole ordeal has made me not want to go anywhere for a long time.

the problem is my intense fear and depression makes me too scared to go to the embassy. i need to know my pup will not be taken from me.


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Re: I need help!
« Reply #4 on: February 05, 2020, 08:53:43 PM »
Of course he won’t. No reason to have those thoughts. Can a friend go with you?


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Re: I need help!
« Reply #5 on: February 05, 2020, 08:58:50 PM »
Of course he won’t. No reason to have those thoughts. Can a friend go with you?
i don’t have any friends here. i have... people i kinda know, but not the type who would go with me to something like this


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Re: I need help!
« Reply #6 on: February 05, 2020, 09:16:00 PM »
Maybe having a read about it will give you more confidence. Or you might want to stat out by giving them a call?  (0)20-7499-9000
https://uk.usembassy.gov/u-s-citizen-services/emergency-financial-assistance/


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Re: I need help!
« Reply #7 on: February 05, 2020, 09:28:39 PM »
Maybe a call to the Samaritans might help too, just to get things off your chest and put them in perspective?

https://www.samaritans.org/scotland/branches/central-london/


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Re: I need help!
« Reply #8 on: February 05, 2020, 09:48:35 PM »
Maybe having a read about it will give you more confidence. Or you might want to stat out by giving them a call?  (0)20-7499-9000
https://uk.usembassy.gov/u-s-citizen-services/emergency-financial-assistance/ [nofollow]
thanks but that only explains how to transfer money from people you know.


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Re: I need help!
« Reply #9 on: February 05, 2020, 09:49:34 PM »
Maybe a call to the Samaritans might help too, just to get things off your chest and put them in perspective?

https://www.samaritans.org/scotland/branches/central-london/ [nofollow]
i actually tried when this all first happened... nobody answered


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Re: I need help!
« Reply #10 on: February 05, 2020, 09:57:59 PM »
thanks but that only explains how to transfer money from people you know.

That’s just one of the things they can help with. If you don’t have anyone who can help you and you have exhausted all your options, you may qualify for a repatriation loan issued by the US Government.

You need to contact first them though, to find out what your options are... otherwise you’re just gonna be stuck in the same position you are right now for who knows how long.

Here’s the official US government guidance on Repatriation Loans:
https://fam.state.gov/FAM/07FAM/07FAM0370.html


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Re: I need help!
« Reply #11 on: February 05, 2020, 11:04:58 PM »
That’s just one of the things they can help with. If you don’t have anyone who can help you and you have exhausted all your options, you may qualify for a repatriation loan issued by the US Government.

You need to contact first them though, to find out what your options are... otherwise you’re just gonna be stuck in the same position you are right now for who knows how long.

Here’s the official US government guidance on Repatriation Loans:
https://fam.state.gov/FAM/07FAM/07FAM0370.html [nofollow]


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well, after reaching out to several people i think i may have come up with enough to cover my costs.

here are my hurdles: i don’t know what i need to move my dog back. paperwork, shots, etc...

home office still has my passport. so how do i book a flight for my dog and i without it, and how do i get it back without just being detained and stuck on a flight back without my dog?


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Re: I need help!
« Reply #12 on: February 06, 2020, 12:05:39 PM »
well, after reaching out to several people i think i may have come up with enough to cover my costs.

here are my hurdles: i don’t know what i need to move my dog back. paperwork, shots, etc...

home office still has my passport. so how do i book a flight for my dog and i without it, and how do i get it back without just being detained and stuck on a flight back without my dog?

Ah, I didn't realise the Home Office had your passport.  Have they had that for the last couple of years then?  Have you received notice of when you need to leave the UK by?  And options?  You'll want to follow the instructions that you have decided to voluntarily leave, prior to being detained.  They'll arrange to have your passport ready for you to board your flight (a Home Office official will check that you've boarded and you'll be handed your passport then). 

It's very easy to bring an animal to the USA.  Nothing like US to UK.  https://www.aphis.usda.gov/aphis/pet-travel/bring-pet-into-the-united-states/pet-travel-dogs-into-us


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Re: I need help!
« Reply #13 on: February 07, 2020, 03:12:14 AM »
Ah, I didn't realise the Home Office had your passport.  Have they had that for the last couple of years then?  Have you received notice of when you need to leave the UK by?  And options?  You'll want to follow the instructions that you have decided to voluntarily leave, prior to being detained.  They'll arrange to have your passport ready for you to board your flight (a Home Office official will check that you've boarded and you'll be handed your passport then). 

It's very easy to bring an animal to the USA.  Nothing like US to UK.  https://www.aphis.usda.gov/aphis/pet-travel/bring-pet-into-the-united-states/pet-travel-dogs-into-us [nofollow]

when i filed for an emergency extension on my visa i still had to use my fiancé’s address cause i was literally living in a shed. i thought i’d at least hear back from him if i got anything from home office, but we’ve had no contact since, so i have no idea what my status is (but i assume i was refused, cause i see no way i’d be approved).

my big worry is that if something happened like i was sent a removal order or reporting conditions (i read all about those), that my attempt to leave may end up with me being arrested for immigration crimes or something
« Last Edit: February 07, 2020, 05:28:46 AM by FinnickMom »


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Re: I need help!
« Reply #14 on: February 07, 2020, 07:37:38 AM »
ok, so a group of friends raised enough money for my ticket, and all the costs to take my dog along as checked baggage.

so the only thing left is my passport. can i contact the us embassy about this? i am WAY too scared to try to contact home office, cause i have no clue what happened with my last visa application or what my current status is.


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