DISCUSSION: Before you move: Things to really think about

Look upon it all as an adventure (that's what it is!).  I had no problems exploring my surroundings & trying public transport.  Sure, it's a little annoying NOW that the grocery is miles away & sometimes doesn't have half the things I need, but when I first came over it was like a challenge to become perfectly aquainted with what's around me & know exactly where to find this & that.

Okay, this is way off topic now.

1.  Yes, it's a grand adventure but the point I was trying to make, "Things to really think about" is that it's not America Lite.  Things are different.

2.  I wanted Sharpies because I was anally colour coding all of my flash cards for law school.

3.  I did not *actually* cry because of laundry detergent.

4.  I've lived here a grand total of 2 years and don't plan on moving back.  I am happy.  I love public transport.  I have a long list of reasons why I love living in the UK.  The point that I was trying to make is that it isn't the same.  And sometimes, just sometimes, when you're already a bit homesick, small frustrations will set you off.  And that's something that people who are thinking of moving here need to take into consideration.

I feel as though I have been misunderstood or I'm not being clear as to my meaning.  http://talk.uk-yankee.com/index.php?topic=27468.0 that is the incident I was talking about, and maybe I explained it better there.

I think that no matter how long you are here, every now and then you will miss something or find yourself suddenly reminded of something you didn't realize you liked back in the US.  And certainly when you first get here, it can be very overwhelming and disconcerting.

I understood what you were trying to say, T. But I'm also glad that you are happy here, too!

I think that no matter how long you are here, every now and then you will miss something or find yourself suddenly reminded of something you didn't realize you liked back in the US.  And certainly when you first get here, it can be very overwhelming and disconcerting.

I understood what you were trying to say, T. But I'm also glad that you are happy here, too!

I to understand what you were trying to say Trillian been through it myself. Im just glad we both have settled in here & are happy with our lives here.

When I moved to England I was utterly overwhelmed with all the little differences (I suppose it didn't help that I was eight months pregnant).  I remember walking down the grocery aisles completely and utterly baffled at all the different brands available.  That said, I've really enjoyed trying all the cheeses and different sweets!   I didn't expect the change to be so overwhelming.  We've been here two years, and now I feel at home here in West Yorkshire even though I miss America.  For some people, it takes time to get adjusted, and that's ok.  Other people really thrive on the change  (such as my dh) and get into the swing of things here right away!  Having a few things around you that connect you with your culture can really make you feel much more at home.  For me, having my kitchen aid mixer from America (kind of odd) has made all the difference in the world.

Great thread!  I'm moving to London in the summer (voluntarily through my company).  I understand that the London that I know from my visits is a very different from the London I will live in and so I think I've been realistic in weighing the pros and cons.  I'm not going to say I've thought of everything listed in this thread on my own, but I've considered a lot of the "warnings" and there's nothing yet that makes me not want to move.  It's more of a nervous excitement...

The problem is that my move is, for all intents and purposes, temporary.  I'm not going over with a husband or boyfriend, and while I have no time limit on my work project, I don't think I'll be living in the UK for the rest of my life (My mother told me that when I have children, I'd better not be living in another country because she wants to know her grandchildren). 

So how do you balance homesickness and adjustment in two different countries in a relatively short amount of time (say, 3 or 4 years)? I'm worried that, like so many of you,  I will become adjusted to life in the UK and when it comes time to move back to the States, I will be "without country." 

I apologize if this should be under a different topic.  It's just one of things I'm trying to think about before I move!

So how do you balance homesickness and adjustment in two different countries in a relatively short amount of time (say, 3 or 4 years)? I'm worried that, like so many of you,  I will become adjusted to life in the UK and when it comes time to move back to the States, I will be "without country." 

As far as homesickness, you do one of two things:  1. wallow in it or 2.  get on with it and adjust.  you do get used to living away from family and friends and everything that is familiar. 

While you can go back to the US after living in the UK, it will never be the same as when you left.  Your eyes will be open wider, you will have a perspective on the world that not many other people will share.  You cannot unring the bell, so-to-speak.

For many who move back, the transition is sometimes as difficult as it was to move to the UK in the first place. It happens eventually, but don't expect that you will just pick up where you left off. 

I always weigh it against the richness of experiences I've gained.  Always, it's on the side of living abroad because those experiences are what has made my life what it is.   

Thank you, it helps a lot.  I suppose I will just cross that bridge when I come to it....

As far as homesickness, you do one of two things:  1. wallow in it or 2.  get on with it and adjust.  you do get used to living away from family and friends and everything that is familiar. 

While you can go back to the US after living in the UK, it will never be the same as when you left.  Your eyes will be open wider, you will have a perspective on the world that not many other people will share.  You cannot unring the bell, so-to-speak.

For many who move back, the transition is sometimes as difficult as it was to move to the UK in the first place. It happens eventually, but don't expect that you will just pick up where you left off. 

I always weigh it against the richness of experiences I've gained.  Always, it's on the side of living abroad because those experiences are what has made my life what it is.   

Beautifully put!

I know that my adventures abroad have surely shaped me into the person I am and the person I want to be. I agree with your eyes widening up to the ways of the world. I was in many ways, naive to things.....now, coming up on 3 years of to and fro between countries, I wouldnt trade any of the experiences I've had.

Fun times.

 

Lots of great information here...have encountered many of these issues in the 13 months I've been here.  A must-read for anyone about to move over--and those of us who are still adjusting.  Thanks!

*hijack*

Best avatar EVER, meebs!!!

 

Vicky

One black, one blue. 

I appreciate the fact that this was your experience, but i cant really accept that it's like this for everyone.   Despite it being 20+ years ago, i do vaguely remember what it was like when i first arrived here-- and it wasn't a trauma.  I'm not the type of person to have a breakdown over anything, really...  let alone washing powder!     Sniff them all... see which one you like best, and buy it!   It was all a big adventure... going on public transport to find something was an adventure, cos we didnt really have trains & buses where i came from.   Going to the supermarket and looking at all the funny brands and labels was great fun!  I wasn't looking for everything to be just like it was 'back home'... I just wanted to soak it all in and experience it all!

I think this is the point of this thread. For some people, myself included, moving to a new place is an adventure. I wouldn't want to eat the same foods or use the same washing powder that I did in America - if I did, I wouldn't have moved away from America in the first place.

However, not everybody is like that. There are people who have difficulty dealing with change --who get extremely upset when they find out that certain things aren't the way they are used to. Everybody has to adjust to a certain degree, and everybody will probably have bad days as they are adjusting, but somebody who absolutely has to have things a certain way should think again before making the decision to move to another country.

I have been coming and going from US to UK for 6 yrs, now finally married and settled in England.  RE-religion - I was raised Christian Reformed - anyone know what that is??  Haven't seen a church of that religion yet, but that does not bother me, as I know God is always with me.  What I appreciate is that my friends and family in northern US are still shoveling snow, and I am planting lilacs etc.  I do get attention because of my (non) accent, but don't mind.  I prayed for years to be able to marry the man I love, and was granted that, no way am I denying it.  Yes, I miss my family, but they are all scattered throughout the US, and didn't see much of them when I lived there.  Yes, I miss my children, but as kids do, they grew up and are in their 20's with lives of their own.  Yes, the government here is different, and I don't always agree with it, but didn't always agree with US government either.   Perhaps it's different for me, as I am 54 yrs old.  But I have lived my life and I am happy.

A quick search seems to indicate that the Christian Reformed Church don't have a mission in the UK.

Vicky

We do have the United Reformed Church in the UK - I don't know if it's any relation to the Christian Reformed Church in the US, but here's the official website and some info about the religion from Wikipedia:
 
http://www.urc.org.uk/

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/United_Reformed_Church