One of the problems we can have when first arriving in a new country is identifying with our new home. This is the same for someone going to a new town as it is for someone moving to a new country.
If you are taking up residence in the UK I would suggest that once you've settled in you try and locate voluntary organisations, local schools and social events in your area and join in. I'm afraid just going to work or the local pub doesn't help much. This is as true for someone coming over alone as it is for families.
The hardest thing about settling in is assimilating, and you can't do this from your home. The pub is fine as a meeting place for existing friends, but like bars in the States it doesn't always offer the best environment to make quality friendships. You have to get out and meet the people, and going to evening classes, joining a voluntary organisation or going to regular community events will help. The British aren't that different from us, they like to see that people arriving here from another country are making an effort to become assimilated with their society. In the main you will find new friends and interests if you do this. And if you're shy, you will find this is definitely the right move to make. The British love the quiet ones.
I know this sounds like old hat type advice, but it is sound advice. If you think there is nothing in your area for you to join in, then start something, but don't be pushy, most people here already have a life and it's you that has to fit in, not them.
The British are not very good at making approaches, in fact in the 35 years I've been here the only time I've been approached and offered a welcome is when I've made the effort to become involved.
Don't be afraid to introduce yourself to your neighbours. I make point of doing that whenever I move to new place, that gives me the chance to see what my neighbours will be like and if they are a community or not. If they're not a community I don't buy or rent in the area.
Do your best to avoid making comparisons, even in a light hearted sense, at least until you get to know the people well and that will take time. Unlike the States, where we make friends quickly, the British prefer a slower route. Making comparisons here sound more like complaints to the British ear unless it's them making the complaint, just the same as we do when someone visiting our town tells us what is and isn't available and is avilable in their own country. The Brit's hate whiners, and if your light hearted comments about their country are misinterpreted you may find your self ostracized very quickly.
In the time I've been here I've been involved in a number of charities and local events, and while I have to admit the hardest thing is making that first contact, picking up the phone and calling a stranger to ask about their organisation and if I can be of any help, the effort has never failed to create new and lasting friendships.
If you are hoping that something will turn up if you are here long enough, then don't hold your breath, rarely will that happen here, you have to do the work if you want to enjoy your time here. If you really want to meet the British and see the country don't be afraid to get out there and do some work, you'll find they are very accommodating and will take to you much faster if you are seen to be making and effort.
Well that's my advice for what's it's worth, sorry if it sounded a bit like a do/don't list:)
Oh, and one last thing, this is probaly for my benefit more than the British:) try and avoid being loud, and avoid using terms like "isn't that cute/sweet/quaint", no one likes to be pratonised and nothing will make me run faster from my fellow countrymen when they make it apparent they have just come from the States and feel the need to let everyone within earshot know it, it embarrasses me and the people listening to it. The Brit's generally hate "cute", both in word and deed which may explain their lack of family friendlyness.
Okay, I'm ready for the verbal beating, or should I just get my coat and leave queitly
