Ok. I changed my name in the States a few years ago. No biggie. A year before we were going to make the move across the puddle I thought I'd best get my Irish passport updated with the new name. (It'd been in a drawer gathering dust.) Ok, so if I'd been married or divorced and wanted to use a new name, no problem. But because I went to court and had my name legally changed, I had to use it - and accumulate hardcopies of proof of having used it - for two full years before the Irish passport office would issue me a replacement in my new name.
Ok, it's their laws - all I can do is play by their rules. So we had to do the move over with me having two passports, two nationalities, two different names. It's worked out ok. More or less. Schizophrenic situations are no strangers in my household!
Had to get a statutory declaration signed before a JP for the bank to change my name from the old one (which was on the Irish passport I had to use to come into the country and get my banking set up). Had a nice train ride to keep from having to wait an extra month, got that done. Hand carried the paperwork into the bank. Who has sent me replacement credit cards and debit cards in the wrong name, and checks and deposit slips in the wrong name, and also, because the Daughter has signing authority on my accounts, checks and deposit slips to her with the wrong name on them.
I made four separate phone calls to the bank, starting the day after I hand-carried in the court document in and they supposedly changed everything. I received mail that next day with my new last name but old first name and phoned them immediately. Warned them that I was expecting a new debit card, new credit card, and new checks and to please verify that both names had been changed. Yes, all taken care of.
Then the debit card came like that - old first name, correct last name. And with a Mrs on it instead of Ms. Phoned them again. They cancelled it and sent a new one - to my old name, but the card was in the correct name and status, and worked. Then the credit card came - wrong first name. Phoned. They re-issued it in the correct name. Online banking insisted on the wrong first name. Had to phone their webmaster and spent a half hour on the phone getting that sorted. So everything was supposedly fixed. Then the checks came, addressed to my full old name (and Mrs.), with my old first name and new last name on the checks themselves. Took them physically to the bank and sat with a senior banking guy while they tried to get everything corrected - I was still in some of their databases with the wrong first name. They were going to get me new checks sent. Ok, supposedly that's all fixed. We'll see.
I get charged per call, as I'm on a pay as you go plan.
All the UK stuff is now in my current, correct name. (Hypothetically - the bus pass people did the same thing, changed only my last name. That's now fixed.)
So I had sent off a couple of weeks ago using the expedited service to get my Irish passport in my new name, as it's due to expire at the end of the summer. Paid extra for 3-week turnaround service. Followed the instructions given precisely. Included a pre-paid special delivery return envelope for them to send the passport, as instructed. Took it all to the passport express office in City Center in the pouring rain and sent it off.
Should be issued any day now.
So yesterday I'm checking the online tracker. But it says "woah, there's a problem with your application. We've sent you a letter." (Oh, hell.) Sure enough, later that morning a letter arrived, in my pre-paid special delivery envelope that was supposed to have been used to send me my passport, with my application materials and two of the four passport photos they said I had to provide. Seems that they want my passport card back to cancel. Now, they didn't want my actual passport back, as it expires at the end of the summer. I was allowed, per the paperwork, to send a certified copy of that, since there was less than six months left on it. The passport card also expires at the end of the summer and is only valid while the passport that matches it is valid. Nowhere in any of the paperwork did they request I send back the passport card to be cancelled.
What. Ever.
Ok, so mad dash to the post office to send it to them, next day signed for/tracked, special delivery by 1pm. Done right after dealing with the bank officer. Put a note in there saying, sorry, I had not been asked for the card previously, there was nothing in the instructions about sending it back, but I was including it per their request. And did they want the two photos back, as they had requested four and had inexplicably sent two back? And that I hoped they'd send the passport via a secure means as they'd already used the special delivery envelope I'd sent for just that purpose rather than phoning, emailing, or sending a regular letter.
So I'm paying for this first-class/signed/tracked/get there to the London Embassy by 1pm the next day letter at the Post Office counter. My debit card is declined. Paid with a different credit card. Walked all the way back to the bank. Tried the card in the inside ATM, declined to function at all, said to check with the issuer.
Saw the same senior banker I'd been working with earlier in the day, standing in the lobby, and cornered him. I'd had to use the same debit card earlier with him so they could log into my account and look at things there. It worked fine then. He got some people together. They had a huddle, and then looked in their systems and said, oh, we're sorry, it's been cancelled. When I asked why the blazes had it had been cancelled? They didn't quite know, but I should have a new one "early next week". They got me some cash from my account to tide me over. With much apologizing. (Thankfully no mail from RBS has arrived today in any name.)
We were going to travel this weekend. I am not comfortable doing that in case they accidentally kill my credit card, and strand us. I told them that, and the woman behind the counter nearby made a joke about how well "my husband" was going to have to foot all the bill then for it, wasn't he? Oh, haha. I'm afraid I said rather coldly I was not married and we were now having to cancel our vacation due to bank incompetence. (Feel kind of bad now, as she looked like she'd had a bucket of water splashed on her.) So the weekend's postponed until further notice. And one more screw up and I'm moving to Bank of Scotland.
So, anyway, today I'm looking online at the Irish passport tracking service. It's been "in process, due to be issued May 22nd" for several days and then yesterday the "there's a problem, Houston" message.
So tonight it's still listed as "there's a problem with your application" - which I expected. I assume that'll be there for a couple of days. So I'm checking the Royal Mail tracking, and it's showing the returned passport card envelope is still out for delivery. It should have been there by 1pm today. SO, I'm assuming that it's one of those cases where they'll eventually upload the information - perhaps it was signed for on paper and those take longer. (Oh, dear heavens, please let them NOT have lost it!)
Sent an email to the designated Irish contact I was given at the embassy in London with the tracking info and letting them know it should have been there this morning, and could they please confirm that?
Sigh. Because if it's lost I believe I need to go make a written statement to that effect in front of a JP and then send it in to the Irish embassy.
We're kind of in a hurry to get this passport, as we need to get some stuff filed for the Daughter that requires a copy of it be included. Have another appointment a week from Friday with a JP to have some other documents witnessed that need that. So if the passport doesn't arrive by a week from today, we'll have to reschedule with the JP, which will take the better part of another month.
And all of this because of the initial two-year "you must use your name that long, even if you have a court order changing it" because it wasn't done through marriage or divorce.
Christ on a pogostick.