Coping with the LDR

Sell all the stuff he gave you on Ebay! 

Well,  I called him and poured my heart out to him begging for him to come home.

He told me in his mind he has already moved on and i should do the same.

Guess thats as good as its gonna get,  Time for me to move on, even though i dont want to and its the hardest thing i have ever had to do.

Take care all xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Moving on is sooo hard. My previous long term relationship was so serious I thought I was gonna marry the guy. When I ended it, it was incredibly hard. Let yourself mourn but also keep reminding yourself it's OVER, and never call him again no matter how tempting it is. That's the ONLY way to get over him.

But remember, time heals everything. And it really does. Throw away EVERYTHING, no matter how sentimental -- love letters, pictures, cards, everything. I'm usually a hoarder, but I did it after the breakup, and it really freed me.

You'll get over him, believe it or not. And when one door closes, another opens. 

A name change might help you too. I was previously known on here as Angie....my ex-english-bf is the only person who  I ever let get away with calling me that. So when we broke up, it use to drive me crazy getting on here and seeing it.

I was thinking getting rid of the tickers may help a bit too, or changing them to something you can look forward to. Try to look for something positive to focus your attention on. I am sure it must be hard... hugs to you. Hang in there!

Well, I have nothing to suggest really, as eveyrone else has said what I would say

I just want to say I'm sorry you're going through such a bad time, and hang in there! And vent all you need, people on here will always listen and offer you advice and consolation.

You know what? This thread is kind of nice. I thought I was the only one on here who had a failed LDR.

Hi guys,

I have spoken to a couple of you outside of the forums and it has helped me a lot, and so have many of the suggestions for moving on.

As you can see,  my tickers have gone and so has my original avatar.

Dave called me last night and we had a very friendly talk about whats going on in our lives now.  It still seems weird to me to not tell him i love him, but i kept those thoughts to myself and i never said a thing about us. I kept it all very formal.  His voice was kind of suprised when i told him I had to go, it was always the other way round and i would not let him hang up before.

I have boxed up most of the memories, but every now and then i come across something and just go and put it in the box.  I have already changed the size of the box once already and its getting full again. I never realised how much stuff we had accumilated in the 5 months he was here and the 2 yrs we were together.

Well,  time to move on i guess, its no good sitting in the past because hes not going to be coming back.

ImissEngland and MissIndigo,  Thanks for the chat the other night,  it helped heaps   

Good for you. It's not easy but you'll get there.

Healing a heart and mind takes time.  Wishing you good things.

I just want to say I am glad you are still around here, and have found some comfort in chatting with others that have been through similar experiences. I am sure it will take time, and lots of it, but you will make it through! Try and keep your head up! 

you are doing awesome girl!  really.......

Just found out how to change my display name too   

Think this one os pretty good

This happened to me a few years ago Jane. I changed my telephone number and blocked his emails (he ended the relationship). It helped me enormously to "get over" him.

He eventually tried contacting me through another email address, asking me to call him as he found he still loved me and wanted to be with me. It threw me into a whirl of emotion, but I decided that I could never trust him again, and so I replied asking him not to contact me and wished him well for the future.

He came over to the UK and knocked on my door one day out of the blue!  We talked for hours, I told him how much he had hurt me and you know, All I could see was that his ego was stroked that he had caused me pain (he said the right words but the looks said something entirely different). I asked him to go and let me have some time to think. He went back to the US and I sent him an email a few weeks later to say "sorry and no thanks".

That was over five years ago. Since then I have met and married my husband who I love to bits.

I hope this might help in some way. I feel for you , lots of hugs.

My ex had the nerve to say "I still loved you, but I just did think we would ever be able to be in the same country again." WTF?!? This while I'm living in England, and he's got a girlfriend.       

ok guys, i need you more than ever now.

Dave was meant to call me last night but i left him a msg telling him i was having an early night and not to call.
Well, he didnt call last night, but called me first thing this morning to ask me why i didnt want him to call last night.

Anyway,  the chat got round to us and i told him i am getting used to the idea of moving on and thats why i dont call him.
He tells me that nothing is set in stone yet and he is still very confused about the whole situation and cant get me out of his head.  I tell him he has to work on that. ( Giving me the impression there still may be a chance ) He tells me he doesnt feel enough to come back though. But then goes and tells me he just got a loan out and bought a new truck which is in the 6 figure sum.
I tell him that there is his answer, He cannot come back now as he has made other commitments for himself. He says he has just dug a bigger hole for himself.

Im thinking i should just call him and tell him to sort his life out, not to call me for maybe a month, get his confusion out of his head and live his life and let me live mine,  but, thats not what i want to do, I want to give him the time to work things out in his head but still look at it as it is and that we are through, that way when he makes his mind up, i wont get thrown into the darkness once again but will have prepared myself for it and if he decides that he is coming back then that would be a bonus.

This has thrown me into confusion once again, just as i was starting to get out of my hole.

Help me out guys